I love you...and stuffmyeyescantlieApril 3 2005, 00:29:23 UTC
I know how you feel. Sorry, I know empathy is annoying sometimes, but I really do understand. A little different though, in my case. You see, I never had that close relationship with any of my current friends. I never had that spend-every-weekend-at-eachother's-house type of friendship. I'm not trying to say that you have it easier for experiencing that, in fact, it may be easier having never had that. You can't lose something you never had to begin with. Anyway...I know how you feel when you say you don't feel like you fit in. I honestly don't know the last time one of my friends called me and just asked me if I wanted to hang out. It sucks. As for you and I...I consider you one of my best friends. I'd like to think that that's mutual, but I don't know. You definitely are not "that one person," at least not in my eyes. I've never heard anyone talk about you like that either. You said that you didn't want anyone to just tell you about yourself, so I'm going to make this part brief. I trust you, more than any other friend I have. I mean, you have the password to my other journal, you're one of the two people that read this one, I tell you...well, everything that's important. I honestly can't think of one secret I have from you. I tell you the truth and you return that back. I can trust that you're not just going to tell me what I want to hear, what will make me feel better. You're going to tell me the truth, no matter how much it hurts. You listen to me and you've stuck by me through all my stupid dramatic teenager-in-highschool shit. It sucks that the majority if not all of our friendship takes place at school. I mean, I think we have a pretty great time there when we actually show up for a full day. That is, besides all the annoying teachers, students and homework. I hardly ever see my friends outside of school. Besides that everyone lives millions of miles away, I'm always worried about turning into, as you put it, "that one person." And I figure people have better things to do with their time. I mean, I know you have homework, and you spend the majority of your weekends with Vinnie. Hell, I don't even know if I'm one of the people that you miss and want to see more. Maybe you see me enough as it is and are sick of me, but if not, I'd love to hang out more. You know I don't really sleep, so if you're ever bored or something, give me a call. And I know it's wouldn't be the same, but if you feel like writing three million page emails or notes with funny pictures on them to me, I'd love it. Sorry, I know I get all emo-sounding and shit, but you said to be honest, so I am.
And by the way, i read every single one of your entries, and check daily to see if you've posted anything new. what it comes down to, what I really think, is this: you're the best friend I have, and if I haven't made that clear through my own journal entries and such, then hopefully you can believe it now. I love you.
As for you and I...I consider you one of my best friends. I'd like to think that that's mutual, but I don't know. You definitely are not "that one person," at least not in my eyes. I've never heard anyone talk about you like that either. You said that you didn't want anyone to just tell you about yourself, so I'm going to make this part brief. I trust you, more than any other friend I have. I mean, you have the password to my other journal, you're one of the two people that read this one, I tell you...well, everything that's important. I honestly can't think of one secret I have from you. I tell you the truth and you return that back. I can trust that you're not just going to tell me what I want to hear, what will make me feel better. You're going to tell me the truth, no matter how much it hurts. You listen to me and you've stuck by me through all my stupid dramatic teenager-in-highschool shit.
It sucks that the majority if not all of our friendship takes place at school. I mean, I think we have a pretty great time there when we actually show up for a full day. That is, besides all the annoying teachers, students and homework. I hardly ever see my friends outside of school. Besides that everyone lives millions of miles away, I'm always worried about turning into, as you put it, "that one person." And I figure people have better things to do with their time. I mean, I know you have homework, and you spend the majority of your weekends with Vinnie. Hell, I don't even know if I'm one of the people that you miss and want to see more. Maybe you see me enough as it is and are sick of me, but if not, I'd love to hang out more. You know I don't really sleep, so if you're ever bored or something, give me a call. And I know it's wouldn't be the same, but if you feel like writing three million page emails or notes with funny pictures on them to me, I'd love it.
Sorry, I know I get all emo-sounding and shit, but you said to be honest, so I am.
And by the way, i read every single one of your entries, and check daily to see if you've posted anything new. what it comes down to, what I really think, is this: you're the best friend I have, and if I haven't made that clear through my own journal entries and such, then hopefully you can believe it now. I love you.
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