(no subject)
La tee da. I'm not going to bother getting very much into the drama, just, there it is and there's too much of it. Oh well, at least this time, the drama has nothing to do with me. Well, very indirectly has to do with me, all about my sister, actually. Prrowr. I'm trying not to get horribly upset, I have too much stress as it is without letting other people's decisions about their lives twig me out.
I read Invisible Monsters today and I wrote down a couple of quotes that I liked very much, so here they are for your reading pleasure. Chuck Palahniuk, for those of you who don't know:
"Almost all the time, you tell yourself you're loving somebody when you're just using them. This only looks like love."
"The whole time, growing up," Evie says, "I just thought being a woman would be... not such a disappointment."
"All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring."`
It's kind of funny, because the quote about being a woman being such a dissapointment was along the lines of what I was trying to say with a poem I wrote the other night while I was rather drunk. I'll put it here. I was made to feel oh so very humble when Chuck summed it all up in a sentence when I had to think about it forever and go on so. Ah well, we all have to start somewhere, I do believe.
BATHROOM
the mirror
I see the mirror
know the contours of the reflected face
When I was a girl,
all long dresses
long hair
long days
reflections were in my mind.
Wondering who I would be
after I was
big
Assumed I would be respectable
fervently hoping, fingers crossed
as I stood tip toe
that when I grew up
in a few years
I would not recognize
the mirror
I see the mirror
and I do.
Invisible Monsters was my favorite Palahniuk book so far, even though I must say, it was a mistake for him to write it from the viewpoint of a woman in the first person. He really can't make believable female characters. I felt the book was a success despite that fact. Either that or the main character is just so fucked up it really doesn't matter what gender she is, she doesn't seem human enough to have such a petty label.
Bah. I don't know why I get out of bed in the morning. Without my Backus, it feels so pointless, even more of just the stupid revolving door bullshit where I run and run but don't get anywhere no matter how hard I try. And god dammit, I try fucking hard. At least when he is here I know that I have something to look forward to at the end of the day. And there is nothing like the smile of a person who is genuinely joyed to see you.
I believe a word by Yannis Ritsos would be appropriate here to end all this:
Don't squander still another hour
with forecasts and remorse, with self-reproach
as your fingertips roll another fat cigarette
-From 'Insufficiency'
I read Invisible Monsters today and I wrote down a couple of quotes that I liked very much, so here they are for your reading pleasure. Chuck Palahniuk, for those of you who don't know:
"Almost all the time, you tell yourself you're loving somebody when you're just using them. This only looks like love."
"The whole time, growing up," Evie says, "I just thought being a woman would be... not such a disappointment."
"All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring."`
It's kind of funny, because the quote about being a woman being such a dissapointment was along the lines of what I was trying to say with a poem I wrote the other night while I was rather drunk. I'll put it here. I was made to feel oh so very humble when Chuck summed it all up in a sentence when I had to think about it forever and go on so. Ah well, we all have to start somewhere, I do believe.
BATHROOM
the mirror
I see the mirror
know the contours of the reflected face
When I was a girl,
all long dresses
long hair
long days
reflections were in my mind.
Wondering who I would be
after I was
big
Assumed I would be respectable
fervently hoping, fingers crossed
as I stood tip toe
that when I grew up
in a few years
I would not recognize
the mirror
I see the mirror
and I do.
Invisible Monsters was my favorite Palahniuk book so far, even though I must say, it was a mistake for him to write it from the viewpoint of a woman in the first person. He really can't make believable female characters. I felt the book was a success despite that fact. Either that or the main character is just so fucked up it really doesn't matter what gender she is, she doesn't seem human enough to have such a petty label.
Bah. I don't know why I get out of bed in the morning. Without my Backus, it feels so pointless, even more of just the stupid revolving door bullshit where I run and run but don't get anywhere no matter how hard I try. And god dammit, I try fucking hard. At least when he is here I know that I have something to look forward to at the end of the day. And there is nothing like the smile of a person who is genuinely joyed to see you.
I believe a word by Yannis Ritsos would be appropriate here to end all this:
Don't squander still another hour
with forecasts and remorse, with self-reproach
as your fingertips roll another fat cigarette
-From 'Insufficiency'