random thoughts
I want to go to the Faroe Islands.
I went on an amazon spending spree after Tenzing's death - I think to fill the hole in my heart. But of course it doesn't - just a distraction. Anyway now I have lots of new books and music to listen to:
Bob Dylan - Oh Mercy
A Badly Drawn Boy - Original Soundtrack from the movie About a Boy
Marianne Williamson - A Return to Love
Spruill and Watson - Feng Shui with What You Have
Leo Tolstoy - Anna Karenina
Outsider Art Sourcebook
Aboriginal Art (World of Art)
Charles Bukowski - Run with the Hunted
Jack Kerouac - Wake Up
Some of you on my friends list may remember yourselves mentioning some of these books or music lately - which is what got me started in wanting them too.
I want to oil paint again - outdoors - but will have to wait till better weather. I see myself going out with a folding lawn chair and setting up down back somewhere.
I want so much to heal a relationship in my life - need to practice a constant forgiving attitude even as I hold my ground against abuse that may come my way. Thinking of miracles of forgiveness and letting go of the past. Need to Let Go Of The Past. If I truly forgive it will not exist anymore.
Going to plant the sweet williams I had in pots last year (they were way too crowded and didn't do well) - I have the spot picked out now. Also need to plant the shasta daisies that were in pots from last year and the silver dollar plants.
Listening to Oh Mercy right now - love it.
Waiting for mom to finish her hot coco - wish she would just DRINK it and get done so I could give her her bath. Sometimes she takes so long - it is so tiresome. But she needs that hot coco cause it has her laxative in it. One of the worst problems that elders have is with their bowels and moving them. I know, ...TMI.
I have a pain in my own bowels lately - probably a spat of diverticulitis. It feels like I have a big painful mass of jelly in my guts that hurts when I move, and when I don't move. Maybe I need to eat softer for a while - no nuts or other hard to digest things. More liquid, more water. I'm having so many aches and pains right now - a crick in my neck and an all day headache behind my eyes yesterday (not there today thank goodness). I am a person who seems to have a pain somewhere in my body, constantly - the pain changes where it is and what it is, but it is a constant thing. I call it my traveling pain (a name I think I got from my sister as she has them too - our mom had them). Lower back pain, open places on my thumbs or fingers, middle back pain, hip pain, chest pain, foot pain. Geez. The fact that they are in a new place everyday makes me not take any of them seriously. Basically I think I truly am a healthy person - it's just physical pains that are trying to get my attention to distract me from mental pain. I need to feel my feelings and let them go.
pains
OK - need to get off here and get on with mom's bath even if she isn't done drinking - the day has to go on...
I went on an amazon spending spree after Tenzing's death - I think to fill the hole in my heart. But of course it doesn't - just a distraction. Anyway now I have lots of new books and music to listen to:
Bob Dylan - Oh Mercy
A Badly Drawn Boy - Original Soundtrack from the movie About a Boy
Marianne Williamson - A Return to Love
Spruill and Watson - Feng Shui with What You Have
Leo Tolstoy - Anna Karenina
Outsider Art Sourcebook
Aboriginal Art (World of Art)
Charles Bukowski - Run with the Hunted
Jack Kerouac - Wake Up
Some of you on my friends list may remember yourselves mentioning some of these books or music lately - which is what got me started in wanting them too.
I want to oil paint again - outdoors - but will have to wait till better weather. I see myself going out with a folding lawn chair and setting up down back somewhere.
I want so much to heal a relationship in my life - need to practice a constant forgiving attitude even as I hold my ground against abuse that may come my way. Thinking of miracles of forgiveness and letting go of the past. Need to Let Go Of The Past. If I truly forgive it will not exist anymore.
Going to plant the sweet williams I had in pots last year (they were way too crowded and didn't do well) - I have the spot picked out now. Also need to plant the shasta daisies that were in pots from last year and the silver dollar plants.
Listening to Oh Mercy right now - love it.
Waiting for mom to finish her hot coco - wish she would just DRINK it and get done so I could give her her bath. Sometimes she takes so long - it is so tiresome. But she needs that hot coco cause it has her laxative in it. One of the worst problems that elders have is with their bowels and moving them. I know, ...TMI.
I have a pain in my own bowels lately - probably a spat of diverticulitis. It feels like I have a big painful mass of jelly in my guts that hurts when I move, and when I don't move. Maybe I need to eat softer for a while - no nuts or other hard to digest things. More liquid, more water. I'm having so many aches and pains right now - a crick in my neck and an all day headache behind my eyes yesterday (not there today thank goodness). I am a person who seems to have a pain somewhere in my body, constantly - the pain changes where it is and what it is, but it is a constant thing. I call it my traveling pain (a name I think I got from my sister as she has them too - our mom had them). Lower back pain, open places on my thumbs or fingers, middle back pain, hip pain, chest pain, foot pain. Geez. The fact that they are in a new place everyday makes me not take any of them seriously. Basically I think I truly am a healthy person - it's just physical pains that are trying to get my attention to distract me from mental pain. I need to feel my feelings and let them go.
pains
OK - need to get off here and get on with mom's bath even if she isn't done drinking - the day has to go on...