Torchwood Review - Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang
Making video reviews of every single episode of this new series would be extremely time consuming, and probably extremely boring for anyone bothering to watch. So instead, I've decided to do written reviews, just in case y'all want to hear what I've got to say. I also have RL stuff which is gonna be shoved in another post to keep things neat, so sorry for the slight spammage. ^^
So let's talk about Torchwood. Or scream in a wild, flailing manner whilst waving around a poster of Jack's face with a big heart drawn round it. Because that's what I'm doing. Right now. In my mind.
I'm going to be systematic and go through it in more or less chronological order, just to keep thing tidy. So let's start off with - the old lady. I loved that old lady. As Nez pointed out, her eyebrows were marvellous. And how great was it that she knew who Torchwood were? That just cements my theory that Torchwood are the WORST secret organisation in the world. The fish prosthetic was good too, but I didn't like his big ranty speech in which he summarised all of the team - it felt very much like unnecessary exposition, and how the hell did he know anyway? But of course, it was good to see Torchwood hasn't lost it's sense of nonsense. ^^
Owen shooting out of a moving SUV was strangely hawt. That is all.
And hooray! The Torchwood team are actually a team! I know that was said over and over again in the promos and previews and whatnot, but it is actually true - they were working together, they weren't bitching as much, and horror of horrors, Ianto was actually useful. And a character. With lines. All the way through. It was so good to see an episode that wasn't necessarily centred on him where he still had a proper role to play - he got the good one liners, he added the practicality (whistling for a taxi whilst the rest of the team were floundering around with gadgets), and he got to be a hero at the end, which was fantastic to see. I really hope this development of Ianto from teaboy to Jack's lover an essential team member continues, because Gareth David-Lloyd really deserves a bigger part. He's too good to waste, in every way. You just watch him when he's in the background or the camera cuts to him for a brief moment - he's always reacting, and those reactions are always spot on. Such a talented actor.
Jack's glorious return was just that - glorious - although as Nez pointed out, there could've been more questioning from the team - I mean, if my boss had disappeared for a couple of months without any prior warning, I'd be a bit more insistent about finding out where he was. Besides which, would it kill them to mention the Doctor explicitly for once? All this 'the right kind of doctor' stuff is a bit wishy-washy - we all know who you're talking about Jack, so just say it.
But can I just ask - why on Earth was Gwen in charge?? I recognise that she's 'omgsospeshal', but she's not the most experienced member by a long shot, and she's not the brightest either. And while we're on the subject of Gwen, all those Gwen/Jack moments were infuriating to say the least. I'm so fed up of their speshal bond just because Gwen is the most sensitive person since Gandhi... Let's hope Rhys actually manages to make an honest woman out of her.
Let's take a moment to remember how wonderful Rhys is. God bless him and all who sail in him. I mean, even when he wasn't there, he was the most compelling character on screen. 'He tried to (get down on one knee), but he had a twinge in his back and had to have a lie down on the settee'. Bless him.
Now. Let me just get this out of my system. SPIIIIIKKKE!!!!!...OK, I feel better now. But seriously, James Marsters could not have impressed me more. As Roy has said, Captain John is close enough to Spike for it to be hilarious for Buffy fans, but different enough to prove how talented James Marsters really is. John was sexy and funny and a huge stirrer, especially where poor Ianto was concerned, and he was also very ruthless - but there's a logic to him that's scarily like Clarkson logic, but with more murder and gay kissing. Well, more murder anyway. And his costume was surprisingly excellent, especially for someone who's very used to seeing Spike in a big black leather coat...I liked the addition of the sword too. And the butt gun.
Course, after Spike John, we got PC Andy, back on the beat. Hooray for PC Andy. He should have his own spin off.
I was very happy to see the cowboy style face off that me and
ladymalchav predicted - we're geniusesesesss. Clearly. And the kiss turning into that fight...good gracious it was brilliant. It was so spot on for their characters - sexy as hell, very dangerous, and obviously enjoyable for both parties. But my goodness, how much did John drink??! A ridiculous amount, that's how much.
What I liked best about this episode was the little teasers into Jack's elusive past, and what's happened since he moved on. The Time Agency shutting down, for example, was a very interesting addition. Although frankly I can see why, if all their agents do is swan around the Universe ripping people off and drinking large amounts of hypervodka.
Well done Chibnall for the Excalibur ref. For those not in the know, that was going to be the title of Rusty's dark sexy sci-fi before he was given the keys to Doctor Who and Jack came into being. Hooray for geekservice.
'You were the wife.' *snigger* They're like Spike and Angel all over again.
The paralytic kiss was very probably lovingly ripped off from the sedative kisses of Mrs Reynolds, otherwise known as Saffron, from Firefly. At least, I really hope it was an homage to Joss Whedon's severely lamented Western sci-fi. Then again, in my mind, all things come back to Whedon in some way or another. I challenge you to find something I can't related back to him. Go on. Dare ya. ^^
The hints of Tosh/Owen, however one sided, were very well played. I like that Owen's grown up enough to realise that he wants a bit more committment, and I do hope that Tosh builds up the nerve to do something about it.
Of course, after the Tosh/Owen we got what me, Nez, Roy and Cait have been anxiously waiting for - IACK!! And my goodness, it was brilliant Iack. Jack's office fetish, 'you're good on roofs', and Ianto's little Super-Wilson-esque hands on hips pose...It was so well played, and so very well scripted. Jack actually seemed to be a bit nervous about it (either that, or he was pretending to be nervous so that Ianto took pity on him), and Ianto's sulky, pretending-not-to-care 'Yes!' made me melt. Finally, they're doing a relationship properly on TW. The hawt secks and stopwatch pr0n is all very lovely, but I also want to see the awkward 'wanna go for a pizza?' stage. It makes it so much more real. Please, Rusty, and all your pals, more of this.
There's really a lot more that I could rant about, but I'll just leave you with this thought - Grey. Or Gray, if they're spelling it the American way. Jack's long-lost very-nearly-a-Mary-Sue kid - Y/N?
Roll on next week.