[Thread] - The makeup's all off

[waterfell]

Characters: AU: Uchiha Sasuke, OU: Mizuno Ami [PGSM]
Where: ??? Mystery!
When:
after Mercury's recent entry and
after Jadeite crashes the party
Summary: Mercury needs comfort. Aww, Sasuke is right there. Wut?
Warnings: possible angst

Comments

[waterfell]

Sounds drifted in from the kitchen, but Mercury ignored them. When the cooking aromas began to permeate her room as well, it became harder to deliberately not notice. What she did notice suddenly was that she hadn't eaten anything yet.

How pathetic. To go without, if that was necessary, should be no hardship. But to wallow in whatever this ridiculous emotion was, so much that she simply neglected to nourish herself, that wouldn't do her much good. She would weaken physically if that sort of thinking kept up long enough, and become easy prey for enemies.

More likely, your enemy would already have destroyed you. That had been a favorite reminder of Kunzite's if she made easily avoidable errors in training; it was very effective. There was a finality about it, a feeling of narrow escape. It propelled the hearer to improve so that the dire warning did not, in fact, become reality.

Mercury knew all that. But somehow, she just didn't feel it.

She was tempted to sneak out and try to steal some of the food. The blue-haired girl was fairly sure Sasuke wouldn't really mind it 'disappearing' And now that he'd - inadvertently, she assumed - made her realize it, she was very hungry.

Did Sasuke care? Somehow the question had become of importance for her, meaningless and futile though it was. Just as it was important to her to know about that man. You tell yourself he wants you... Those words of Orochimaru's had taken root watered by her natural skepticism. Still, she did not think badly of Sasuke, not in the least; whether he cared or no, nothing had been said or done that it would be a betrayal of.

In the end, Mercury unfolded her legs, climbed off the bed, and snuck to her door to try to catch a glimpse of the current kitchen situation.

[embalmment]

He himself was hungry, so it was a good excuse on his part too. He made food and there was extra's. Simple. It really figured that he was this bad. Making excuses for himself because he felt something akin to human. Sasuke stared at the pot of simmering vegitables.

His great stare of intesity upon the food set to cook was interrupted by that feeling. The soft click of a door and that feeling of a presence near by. Mercury of course. She hadn't come in to view yet, however. It was... vaguely amusing, and he couldn't help the very small hitch that caught the corner of his lips. Coals shifted behind long black bangs and his head tipped just a touch to the side for a moment.

Sasuke didn't call her on it. Instead, he looked back to what he were doing; continued what he was doing as if he didn't notice anything out of the ordinary. He placed the boiling kettle off the burner and on to a cool surface to let sit moving to the cupboards to pull down two plates. Only the sound of one if she were listening so closely.

[waterfell]

She felt a little silly when she saw the two plates, but it was a different kind of silly. Instead of pathetic and ridiculous, Mercury simply had the feeling she could have walked right in and should have. This wasn't someone who was going to annoy, taunt, ridicule, or harass her. Actually, it was someone who was taking care of her, it seemed. That was... a nice thought. Particularly right now. That might have been a smile as she stepped somewhat sheepishly into the kitchen.

Now that she was here, she might as well make herself useful. Mercury wordlessly began arranging the table settings and utensils, giving Sasuke the chance to finish the food. It was calming, having some mundane task to complete. She was - despite a very faint normal teenage-girl sweet tooth - normally a healthy eater, and the vegetables smelled good. When she'd finished, she found herself in a corner of the kitchen furthest from Sasuke. She glanced at him.

[embalmment]

He didn't need to further anymore table preporations as Mercury came out into the kitchen herself and wordlessly took that task on her own. If she looked, behind that curtain of ebony which hid his expression, she'd probably see that he were wearing a mild smile when she came forward. It wore down gently in to a calm expression.

Words weren't neccessary right now. They rarely were if you knew the person enough. Words were often unimportant. Merely a way to solidify thoughts, truths, and facts. They meant nothing without application.

When everything was finished he brought the steamed vegitables and cooked rice to the table. The tea as well. He looked up at her. There were signs of her upset etched into her features still, but he did not make any expression that could be interpretted wrongly. Coals merely looked at her as he went to sit upon his knee's at the low table.

[waterfell]

It felt natural to sit here like this; Mercury had also knelt, on the opposite end of the small, low table from Sasuke. She reached for the food and served the man across from her first, quickly choosing the best portions of the food and filling his cup with the aromatic tea. Then she waited for him rather than taking her own quite yet.

Even without tasting it, the blue-haired girl could still tell it would be delicious.

[embalmment]

A thin brow rose when he noticed her serving him. It wasn't that he were waiting for her to do so that he had paused. It wasn't entirely awkward though as they had been rooming together in this empty space for quite awhile and she had frequently been the one to cook. In his eyes it was simply that they came and go. He didn't often understand gender rolls - but when he remembered them from when he was young, things were just like this.

"Mercury," Sasuke finally broke the silence, "you didn't need to do that."

The tone wasn't harsh. It was stated as if it were a fact, and the way his eyes lowered afterwards to his plate was enough to say, 'but thank you.' And also, 'I do acknowledge what you do for me. Those small things.'

Sasuke didn't pick up his sticks to eat first, instead he tended to his tea.

"You need the energy more than I do," the Uchiha continued and took a sip of the warm liquid before he placed it back down, "so eat."

[waterfell]

You didn't need to do that. Such a change from that place where she'd been meant to simply obey and silently. Of course, she'd had no intention of doing that. Kunzite had tolerated her antics, Beryl had hated them, the others had fallen somewhere along that spectrum. Now Sasuke, again and again, was sending such a different message: You're strong, you're worth something whatever part of you is showing, you don't have to do that.

That was part of why she liked doing it. It was her will, her choice.

Mercury was feeling content. She didn't reply verbally right away, but she took the next-best portions for herself. They ate in renewed silence for awhile.

I've been acting like a child. I shouldn't be like this. When I try to calm myself, something keeps happening to make me confused again. Friends, my world, this one, the Dark Kingdom, the senshi, it's all tangled together.

Not, of course, that she knew how to say any of that, although the blue-haired girl finally felt comfortable enough to try.

"Thank you." It was a start. "For the food, thank you." It was delicious, as she'd expected.

[embalmment]

Things were always like this. Of what he remembered, it was how they were. He remembered that it was always the women doing the cleaning and the cooking. That was how things were in his family. It was very rare that a woman had awoken the sharingan as well. It was how things were, but they didn't have to be. Especially here. Mercury was not his partner, or anything of the sort. She was a friend . . . He was pretty certain that Mercury had the power to choose her own actions - whatever the motives.

A reason why the cursed seal didn't settle with him. Why did he let that happen? She wanted it and he stood by her decision. Ami was right though. Orochimaru hit a sore spot of hers, and she didn't need it. And Sasuke was bitter and angry.

His eyes turned down to the plate again and he too began to eat silently. When she thanked him, he nodded in responce.

"You're welcome," he said quietly, 'you should take care of yourself before anything and anyone else' never came out. What a hypocritical statement that would have been.

A soft inhale.

The cursed seal only came out when you wanted it to. When you used it. It was an addictive sorce of power though. The more you used it, the more it took, the more you wanted to use it. But Sasuke had broken that chain. Mercury could too. Or she could simply not use it. You didn't have to use it. She didn't have to use it. He didn't believe that she needed to. So she didn't need to. If she decided that she didn't need to.

Like her, though, he didn't know how to say it, or if it should have even been said at this moment. So he ate and drank in silence.

[waterfell]

She had a traditional mindset in some ways. That happened when you had a past life that stretched for centuries, and when you'd lived all but one year of your current life as a quiet girl. Although the years between the destruction and the reawakening of the sailor senshi and shitennou were blank to her, Mercury remembered the ways of the very distant past. That in itself set her apart; even in her world only three or four people seemed to truly have those memories.

To her, it was the simple fact that Sasuke had been there, that meant everything. When Orochimaru had come, he had been there. She had somehow had the impression Sasuke would have supported - fought for, if need be - her decisions. He was here in this apartment now, taking care of her. He'd done everything for her. Yes, she had total trust in him. All of that, that was what she'd really been thanking him for.

More silence grew. It made her feel very much like her former self, somehow, that girl who never knew how to express herself or what to say.

"What was it like for you, before you had the seal?" she finally asked. What she really wanted to know was whether it could be compared with Metalia, that separation of selves, changing of self, 'rebirth'. Was there a counterpart for him that was as different as Mercury's was to her - just by virtue of a decision, a moment in time?

[embalmment]

He would have stepped in if she decided against it. He would have, and that was definate.

Coals looked up for a moment as she asked that question. He picked up the cut of warm tea after pouring a little more and brought it to his lips. What was it like. What was he like? He took a sip and set it down before responding.

"Addressing..? Myself personally, or myself physically?"

Or something else?

[waterfell]

She hadn't really thought out the question, had she? It was part just wanting to know more about this boy, but it was also wanting to know more about herself. And it was an opening to telling him, or trying to tell him, what she'd been thinking. Let them talk. Get his advice.

"Both of those," she said. After all, everyone knew she always wanted to know everything.

[embalmment]

"before the seal, I was seeking power," he answered after a moment of silence, "after the seal, I was refining my power."

It was the best way he could explain it.

The seal only made what was more solid in his mind. His direction; what he was; who he was; what he needed to do. All of those things were given a firm ground. They were no longer debateable or questionable. They became concrete. They were questions finally answered. So he thought, or pushed himself to believe.

"The physical changes I have endured are not caused by the seal."

[waterfell]

She would have understood those thoughts. Metalia's energy, Kunzite's influence, Mercury sought those things despite her resentments because they had exactly those same - she felt she must believe, as he did - effects. Everything became much clearer and, for her at least, confusion receded.

But then he was talking about physical changes. She knew some of what was happening to him - it was hard to live in close quarters and remain ignorant - but she didn't know nearly all. She took the opportunity to ask. "Then the cause, what is it?"

[embalmment]

"Many," he answered - but added, "nothing you need to worry about."

It was, more or less, true. The things that had altered his body had little to do with the cursed seal if not anything. She did not need to know why the seal was at last effecting him, or what it was doing to him. At least, Sasuke would believe it was not neccessary for her personal knowledge.

He finished up the last bit of his food before neatly placing his sticks down.

"Its not about me, Mercury," he finally spoke again after a moment of silence. His eyes rose towards the female accross him, and he brought the warm cup to his lips for another small sip.

So than, is the seal your concern or is your concern something more general? Power. He recalled her having that feeling of being lost and directionless.

[waterfell]

She had been trying to take away the focus on herself. Of course she had been. And of course Sasuke had noticed. He knew her far too well. There was a half-moment of near panic at that very idea.

He was saying he'd listen to her, and he was Sasuke who she trusted. The panic subsided just as it had begun.

In the Dark Kingdom, we don't have all of our memories. I wonder what else I might be missing. I never had friends before then - only, I'm not sure if that's true. People have told me differently and if I have friends now, they might be right. When they make me feel like I can't change, I don't know why that bothers me. Do I want to be different? I was different before. I didn't like that life. I don't know if I like this one, either.

There was no way to coherently say all of those conflicting and entangled ideas. In the end, Mercury returned to the reason she'd been asking those questions.

"They say our personalities change because of Metalia. My counterpart, she's probably more like I was then."

[embalmment]

Lost. Confuesed in direction. Who am I really? How to explain such a thing; explain his beliefs. Sasuke knew that confuesion to some degree. Yet that, 'this is who you are and what you should be like' was not exactly a pressure he had upon himself as much as it were almost innate to his personality. Ingrained into the fibers of his being: Uchiha. His choices and direction were what had become tangible - and his opinions and beliefs, they too grew and changed. Some more than others.

He let that panic rise and fall as it would and calmly filled her cup with tea. To distract, to sooth, to drink. The kettle was placed back down and he listened. After she had spoken his eyes returned back up to the girl. Like I was than. And that was than, wasn't it? Than which wasn't now.

Sasuke took a short moment before resonding just that way.

"What you were than," he repeated, and went no further yet. He allowed her to continue.