If I were a tea company...

[ebenbrooks]

...I would offer the following teas:

1. Made of Assam
2. Pu-Ehr Baby
3. Mr. Green in the Dining Room with a Teapot
4. The Twelfth Ceylon
5. "I'm Drinking a Sticky Rice Ball" Genmaicha
6. Long John Silver Needle
7. Can't We All Get Oolong?
8. Good Enough for Jasmine
9. I'd Swear That This Is Darjeeling
10. Chamomiles to Go Before I Sleep
11. Curse of the Black Pearls