three tests

[eaerendil]

this is gonna be a fun week. i forgot how good blood tastes.
helps me study. maybe its all mental. idk
i'm not sure i care. part of me still hopes.
i'm such a pushover. i'm either gonna collapse or go nutz and niether sounds tempting.
but i feel it
growing...
somethings going to give
i want more options
but i have no one left to talk to.
no calls back.
no one seems to want to hear.
or they say they don't want to listen.
though the best response so far is "get high, it'll take your troubles away...
...for the night"
fuck that.
no good.
noise shit up.
people that care call.
damnit.