Commercials during hockey games.
Last night, while watching my Senators lose a heartbreaker to the Sabres, I saw three ads that made me laugh. Or cringe. Or both.
The first one, denkizero and I laughed pretty hard at together the other night. It's for a jewellery place in Ottawa, and it features one of the Senators, Jason Spezza. They show one of his more spectacular goals of the season, and then they show him in a suit putting on an expensive watch in the store, with some clichéd voiceovers. One of them goes thusly: "I think motivation is what drives me."
"I think motivation is what drives me"?
Jason, look, I know you're a hockey player and all, but you actually had time to think about this before you said it. You even could've had someone else write it for you. Motivated by drive? Driven by motivation? Ugh.
The other two, were both for the same product. Now, I was watching the game on the Ottawa channel, so I'm not sure who else would've seen them, but anyway... they were for a product called something like "Cheetah Energy Drink". It's in the mold of Red Bull, except that they claim there's no caffeine in it.
The voiceover in the first ad for it was something like this (and when you read the voiceover, you'll probably be able to picture more or less what was on the screen): "The Cheetah - one of the fastest creatures on Earth. Ben Johnson, one of the fastest human beings in history. Where does he get his energy? From Cheetah Energy Drink." (Queue cheesy images of Ben Johnson running superimposed over that of a cheetah running, along with lighting bolts over top of it all.)
So, that set up the product for me, and the second ad had me laughing out loud. It was done in the style of a talk show, called "Being Frank", hosted by some guy presumably named Frank. His guest? One Ben Johnson. "Frank" sets up the talk show by saying that it's called "Being Frank" and the point of the show - as the name suggests! - is not to pull any punches. Then, he leans in towards Ben and asks, "With that said, Ben, do you ever cheat?"
"Yes Frank, I Cheetah all the time!" *holds up a can of the drink*
*Everyone in the audience gasps, then laughs and cheers.*
Where do they get these ideas?
Also, gawdamn, where's Alfie been? It might be too late for him to show up now.
***
Since people were asking about the origins of my user name, I'll go through it here once more. Although, I should mention, that I've answered this question in the past. I suppose I'll just put this entry in the memories or something, and then just point them to it in the future.
When I first started on the Internet, oh, 8 years ago or so, one of the first places that I spent any real time online at was Scarleteen - specifically, the message boards there. Initially, I picked as my username "loshc", because it was what I used for everything online - mostly email addresses. Soon after, though, I realized I didn't want any of my real life friends to stumble across very personal, sex-related posts that I might make at ST. And so I created a new account there, with a new user name. I couldn't decide what to call myself, though, so I opened up an atlas that was lying around near the computer, closed my eyes, and put my finger on a page. It landed close to a town in Mongolia called "Dzuunmod", and so I took that as my user name.
The first one, denkizero and I laughed pretty hard at together the other night. It's for a jewellery place in Ottawa, and it features one of the Senators, Jason Spezza. They show one of his more spectacular goals of the season, and then they show him in a suit putting on an expensive watch in the store, with some clichéd voiceovers. One of them goes thusly: "I think motivation is what drives me."
"I think motivation is what drives me"?
Jason, look, I know you're a hockey player and all, but you actually had time to think about this before you said it. You even could've had someone else write it for you. Motivated by drive? Driven by motivation? Ugh.
The other two, were both for the same product. Now, I was watching the game on the Ottawa channel, so I'm not sure who else would've seen them, but anyway... they were for a product called something like "Cheetah Energy Drink". It's in the mold of Red Bull, except that they claim there's no caffeine in it.
The voiceover in the first ad for it was something like this (and when you read the voiceover, you'll probably be able to picture more or less what was on the screen): "The Cheetah - one of the fastest creatures on Earth. Ben Johnson, one of the fastest human beings in history. Where does he get his energy? From Cheetah Energy Drink." (Queue cheesy images of Ben Johnson running superimposed over that of a cheetah running, along with lighting bolts over top of it all.)
So, that set up the product for me, and the second ad had me laughing out loud. It was done in the style of a talk show, called "Being Frank", hosted by some guy presumably named Frank. His guest? One Ben Johnson. "Frank" sets up the talk show by saying that it's called "Being Frank" and the point of the show - as the name suggests! - is not to pull any punches. Then, he leans in towards Ben and asks, "With that said, Ben, do you ever cheat?"
"Yes Frank, I Cheetah all the time!" *holds up a can of the drink*
*Everyone in the audience gasps, then laughs and cheers.*
Where do they get these ideas?
Also, gawdamn, where's Alfie been? It might be too late for him to show up now.
***
Since people were asking about the origins of my user name, I'll go through it here once more. Although, I should mention, that I've answered this question in the past. I suppose I'll just put this entry in the memories or something, and then just point them to it in the future.
When I first started on the Internet, oh, 8 years ago or so, one of the first places that I spent any real time online at was Scarleteen - specifically, the message boards there. Initially, I picked as my username "loshc", because it was what I used for everything online - mostly email addresses. Soon after, though, I realized I didn't want any of my real life friends to stumble across very personal, sex-related posts that I might make at ST. And so I created a new account there, with a new user name. I couldn't decide what to call myself, though, so I opened up an atlas that was lying around near the computer, closed my eyes, and put my finger on a page. It landed close to a town in Mongolia called "Dzuunmod", and so I took that as my user name.