Random notes on vulnerability

[dyvinesweetness]

So a while ago I saw "I Won't Love You To Death" and since then I have had a minor celeb crush on Mario. I realize part of this is due to vulnerability. For me, vulnerability is very attractive. In fact, I cannot imagine being attracted to someone without them being vulnerable with me in some way. And people who shield themselves might as well look

Comments

[idoto]

And people who shield themselves might as well look like Shabba Ranks.

That hurts.....it really does.....

[dyvinesweetness]

*shrugs* I mean, he was very successful... like ten years ago. Does that make it better?!

[idoto]

ok....when you think shabba do you think success first or do you think ugly?

so nope....

Besides I think your description is missing a couple of reasons for being that way

[idoto]

never mind....never realy said why they're that way so take it back

[dyvinesweetness]

You wanna detail it? Might lead to nice discussions on it. I have ideas.

[idoto]

sure:

I got...mommy and daddy syndrom: You grow up in a situation where you don't share...you almost don't know how to be vulnerable...or you were always taught to swollow it.

I got...I did that once...ain't work out for me syndrom. Some people have been hurt so bad by someone sometime that they've got a real real hard time doing so again.

I got...I don't wanna know you I just like/want the sex syndrom. Typically the shields are a web of lies or making themselves seem vulnerable to get in them draws.

I got...Association syndrom....I seen what opening up did for this person and has a general mistrust for people because of it....

[dyvinesweetness]

I thought of all except the last. Makes sense.

I can add control issues. Those who are the most vulnerable in the relationship tend to be the least in control. The ones least vulnerable (in situations of extreme disparity) tend to dominate. And power is always tempting.

Somewhat similar to your first idea, if you are constantly told "you're being too sensitive" (like I was told ALL the time as a kid), then being vulnerable can feel like being weak.

I would guess that a lot of folks fall under the second category you described. What do you think?

[idoto]

It doesn't make sense to you?

I've seen so many friendships end, strained, whatever because they put so much more trust in them than they should have. Or they tell them something thinking that they could keep it in confidence only to have their business out on the street. None of this has happened to me but trust me I've learned from it.

control issues.....right

I think alot of folk fall under all of them.

[dyvinesweetness]

"It doesn't make sense to you?"

You are the non-readinest... lol

[idoto]

oh......

my bad....I do skim...insert and take out words at times