The Gap
I wanna talk about the gap. The gap between religious folks and those who don't follow a religion. The gap is the pause and physical tension you feel when you mention a nice event or moment and someone who doesn't know your beliefs says "isn't that a gift from God?" You pause not knowing how to react. Do you lie and feign piety, sprinkling your response with 'amen's and hallelujah's? Do you tell the truth and risk getting the "oh you're one of them" (the 'faithless') looks?
The pause is when a relative notes a hard time you're experiencing and says "well, it'll be ok. God has a plan." Do you question why god's plan involved your suffering? Or do you simply note that they are saying what they feel would comfort them in an attempt to comfort you so you accept the love and just smile and nod?
The pause is that moment after someone invites you to church and you try your damnedest [*giggle*] to come up with a legitimate excuse for not seeking "the word of God?" "I was gone praise him, but I got homework."
Because Xtianity is so widely recognized and is basically the default religion for America, there's an assumption that everyone is not only religious, but Xtian. And when those pauses hit and are not met with a waving MLK Jr. fan and swaying arm in the air the gap is made wider.
And I don't yet know how to react. Nor do I know how to approach religion overall. I'm naturally inquisitive and analytical. But my questions are seen as attempts to break down one's faith so people become defensive. I can FEEL it, whether on the phone, online or in person I can feel it. I rarely ask why, at least not individually, because I know that is seen as an attack. But even when I ask what that is met with combativeness as if they feel the why coming and want to avoid it. Sometimes I really just want to know WHAT your beliefs are for the sake of curiosity, knowledge and better understanding. But even if I do want to know WHY you believe, WHY (there I go again) is that so hard to answer?
I just want that space clear. I want to remove the gaps. I'd really like there to be an open venue so people can speak freely about religion. But where do I start? Can this place exist?
The pause is when a relative notes a hard time you're experiencing and says "well, it'll be ok. God has a plan." Do you question why god's plan involved your suffering? Or do you simply note that they are saying what they feel would comfort them in an attempt to comfort you so you accept the love and just smile and nod?
The pause is that moment after someone invites you to church and you try your damnedest [*giggle*] to come up with a legitimate excuse for not seeking "the word of God?" "I was gone praise him, but I got homework."
Because Xtianity is so widely recognized and is basically the default religion for America, there's an assumption that everyone is not only religious, but Xtian. And when those pauses hit and are not met with a waving MLK Jr. fan and swaying arm in the air the gap is made wider.
And I don't yet know how to react. Nor do I know how to approach religion overall. I'm naturally inquisitive and analytical. But my questions are seen as attempts to break down one's faith so people become defensive. I can FEEL it, whether on the phone, online or in person I can feel it. I rarely ask why, at least not individually, because I know that is seen as an attack. But even when I ask what that is met with combativeness as if they feel the why coming and want to avoid it. Sometimes I really just want to know WHAT your beliefs are for the sake of curiosity, knowledge and better understanding. But even if I do want to know WHY you believe, WHY (there I go again) is that so hard to answer?
I just want that space clear. I want to remove the gaps. I'd really like there to be an open venue so people can speak freely about religion. But where do I start? Can this place exist?