(no subject)
Ughh. I'm grumpy. I dunno if it's because I can't sleep or what, but I'm just fucking irritable.
I only slept for about three hours yesterday afternoon after being awake for about twenty hours the day before. I'm tired, but not enough to actually get any sleep yet, and I've got some heartburn going on that's making laying down uncomfortable and nothing to take for it. No one's online, and I've already been through all of my usual bookmarks- twice- so I'm bored out of my fucking mind. Plus, there's been a heaping helping of internet drama around my friends that sure as fuck isn't helping matters.
I dunno. I think it's just the wintertime that fucks with my mood. It screws up my sleeping and makes me grumpy and sick all the time. I'd probably feel better if I went out and did something reckless and somehow destructive, but I don't even know what the fuck I could do. Alaska is completely devoid of any kind of entertainment, and short of vandalizing public property, there isn't much I can do in the way of catharsis, here.
Still no fucking job. Not even so much as a call back on that last one- which I was almost positive was a sure fucking thing- and really nowhere else to apply. Besides which, most places will be laying a bunch of people off after the holidays, not hiring new people on. The money I'd been saving is dwindling, and what the fuck am I supposed to do about that? I can't just not spend it. I have phone and insurance bills, a handful of other personal expenses. I'm pretty much as fucked as I can possibly get right now. Crippling illness would be the only thing here that could stress me out more.
I've been drifting in and out of a drawing slump. Most of what I've come up with lately isn't much more than a quick doodle here and there for a friend or two. Nothing really complete, and hardly anything that I can post anywhere. More than anything, I don't have any ideas. Nothing that actually inspires me to put it down on paper. I'd take requests from friends, but other people giving me ideas has never really done much to spark my inspiration. As it is, if I tell someone I'll draw them something, I generally have the damnedest time getting it done.
I tried playing Sims for a while, since designing and decorating houses will sometimes get my creativity flowing, but I pretty much just got sick of it after about an hour. I dunno what the fuck my problem is. I hate the winter.
I only slept for about three hours yesterday afternoon after being awake for about twenty hours the day before. I'm tired, but not enough to actually get any sleep yet, and I've got some heartburn going on that's making laying down uncomfortable and nothing to take for it. No one's online, and I've already been through all of my usual bookmarks- twice- so I'm bored out of my fucking mind. Plus, there's been a heaping helping of internet drama around my friends that sure as fuck isn't helping matters.
I dunno. I think it's just the wintertime that fucks with my mood. It screws up my sleeping and makes me grumpy and sick all the time. I'd probably feel better if I went out and did something reckless and somehow destructive, but I don't even know what the fuck I could do. Alaska is completely devoid of any kind of entertainment, and short of vandalizing public property, there isn't much I can do in the way of catharsis, here.
Still no fucking job. Not even so much as a call back on that last one- which I was almost positive was a sure fucking thing- and really nowhere else to apply. Besides which, most places will be laying a bunch of people off after the holidays, not hiring new people on. The money I'd been saving is dwindling, and what the fuck am I supposed to do about that? I can't just not spend it. I have phone and insurance bills, a handful of other personal expenses. I'm pretty much as fucked as I can possibly get right now. Crippling illness would be the only thing here that could stress me out more.
I've been drifting in and out of a drawing slump. Most of what I've come up with lately isn't much more than a quick doodle here and there for a friend or two. Nothing really complete, and hardly anything that I can post anywhere. More than anything, I don't have any ideas. Nothing that actually inspires me to put it down on paper. I'd take requests from friends, but other people giving me ideas has never really done much to spark my inspiration. As it is, if I tell someone I'll draw them something, I generally have the damnedest time getting it done.
I tried playing Sims for a while, since designing and decorating houses will sometimes get my creativity flowing, but I pretty much just got sick of it after about an hour. I dunno what the fuck my problem is. I hate the winter.