39
To my love on your birthday
You would've been 39
I know you'd be proud of me
But without you it still hurts all the time
This year feels harder than all the ones before
Everything's changed but nothing's changed
so I don't understand why I feel it more
I'm somewhere in the middle of kansas now
A place I'd never thought I'd be
Doing what I dreamed of
But is it enough for me?
I know you'd have advice to help in times to get me through
A fresh perspective, a new outlook
One that could only come from you
I feel like I've been waiting forever
just to see you in my dreams
Its bullshit how there's so many haunted situations
But none that bring you to me.
At least you don't have to be here
to see how much worse it is now
I often get jealous of that
But I keep the sweat on my brow
I wonder if you'll ever come to see me
I wonder how you'll be.
All I know is you'd be 39
in 2023