Modern Society
I am full of a lot of teen angst but this is a more entertaining variety
I skim and skim and skim and skim through all of the communities and websites of people created, maintaned, and cherished by my peers. I feel so god damn disgusted in my own way because well....to be selfishly honest, I have nothing in common with anyone. I think Gabby is the only girl who even has anything in common with me....thats why I love her so much, plus shes very kind.
But I read and I see people make fucking freaks out of themselves in the name of loud and proud self-expression. It is all meaningless not because we all should conform to what I say and be a master race of automotons. Thats just as bad and happens no matter what.....people subconscienly conform no matter how hard you try. Its just people glorify and get into all these stupid things that were never a part of thier lives in any way in the first place. It is all a very very very stretched out fantasy and its getting the fuck out of hand. When you combine with the fact that not coforming breeds a feeling of elite self esteem. Oh and the fact that this elitism also likes to plug itself into the empty and contradictive everlasting friendships which are meaningless anyway in this fast fast world of backstabbing and judgement that people have taken upon them as the norm in this area even though its REALLY REALLY MESSED UP!
Well I am sorry but in this large vast world I have succeeded in being the most ostrasized person around. Even the unpopular kids and misfits find more unity and bonding among thier own then I ever will. I pull it off for some to be honest completely unknown reason to me. I am not evil or contain evil whims or even do anything that inconsiderate. Everything is so standard and logical to me. People can say to me "maybe if you were not so annoying"......::sigh:: look I have some reality for you for anyone who says that to me, you are much more annoying then I will ever be, I just dont say anything because I am polite and I happen to be a little more deeper then that with regard to how a person actually is. Like for instance nothing makes me wanna put a circular saw to someone who says the following "heh', "eh" and the worst of them all "meh". Ok it was funny the first 500 times now its in the millions and now its a regular part of english speech with a lot of people looking to use it as some kind of crutch. Look I been so high and drunk many many times and been on a bunch of other drugs and I STILL do not use those words or ones related. Granted it might slip out of everyone (me included) and something instinctive on a very rare occasion, but not to make it a fucking facet of your god damn vocabulary. That is just one of many memorable things people do which annoy the ever loving piss out of me but I dont say something because I try and be ever so nice....why I dont know.
So where was I? Oh yeah.....to not conform and be completely unique stems so much elitism and groups and cliques and sub-societies it isnt funny. It becomes the name of the game to develop that sort of slice of the pie. I am probobly the winner in all of that pissing contest, I dont try either. I be me and I do not hide who I am in any way. If I like it I like it I hate I hate I am exactly whats shown when it comes to simple shit like that and noone ever will fucking understand that or even connect with me in that way and its kinda fucking fundamental if you wanna have some sort of life with friends. I did meet one person I felt that kinda thing with....and we all know what happend to her.... I feel like I am some kind of loophole, some kind of person who can beat it all on the social scale yet not even try, some kinda of pure luck which also is a curse, for this loophole if you will is recognised as so foreign in the world that accepts such malicious and wicked actions among others and dares call it the norm. I get fucked over in every which way possible and without any sort of god damn remorse.
I think God either was murdered by most of you cunt rags (Ill name names on request) or was egged on through such horrible activity to blow his own brains out.
The ironic thing is I just am better then almost everyone with a majority of things and im like 99.99999% right with a lot of shit. I dont try and its not my goal ever and to be honest I wanna be wrong, and to be normal, but also myself. I wanna have friends and feel comfortable and have things be the way thats right for a flawed but hopefully meaningful world, not how it is now with me.
I dont get it.....I just dont....so have fun with your really messed up culture and views in this rotten area...I love the parks but majority of you people need to be lobotomozed or horrible tourtured or something that will snap you out of the fucking bullshit you spit on my face with.
if you keep it up Ill start naming shit which really pisses me off....we all know how much trouble that starts.....and MaryBeth, Ill stop speaking when the world stops lying.
I skim and skim and skim and skim through all of the communities and websites of people created, maintaned, and cherished by my peers. I feel so god damn disgusted in my own way because well....to be selfishly honest, I have nothing in common with anyone. I think Gabby is the only girl who even has anything in common with me....thats why I love her so much, plus shes very kind.
But I read and I see people make fucking freaks out of themselves in the name of loud and proud self-expression. It is all meaningless not because we all should conform to what I say and be a master race of automotons. Thats just as bad and happens no matter what.....people subconscienly conform no matter how hard you try. Its just people glorify and get into all these stupid things that were never a part of thier lives in any way in the first place. It is all a very very very stretched out fantasy and its getting the fuck out of hand. When you combine with the fact that not coforming breeds a feeling of elite self esteem. Oh and the fact that this elitism also likes to plug itself into the empty and contradictive everlasting friendships which are meaningless anyway in this fast fast world of backstabbing and judgement that people have taken upon them as the norm in this area even though its REALLY REALLY MESSED UP!
Well I am sorry but in this large vast world I have succeeded in being the most ostrasized person around. Even the unpopular kids and misfits find more unity and bonding among thier own then I ever will. I pull it off for some to be honest completely unknown reason to me. I am not evil or contain evil whims or even do anything that inconsiderate. Everything is so standard and logical to me. People can say to me "maybe if you were not so annoying"......::sigh:: look I have some reality for you for anyone who says that to me, you are much more annoying then I will ever be, I just dont say anything because I am polite and I happen to be a little more deeper then that with regard to how a person actually is. Like for instance nothing makes me wanna put a circular saw to someone who says the following "heh', "eh" and the worst of them all "meh". Ok it was funny the first 500 times now its in the millions and now its a regular part of english speech with a lot of people looking to use it as some kind of crutch. Look I been so high and drunk many many times and been on a bunch of other drugs and I STILL do not use those words or ones related. Granted it might slip out of everyone (me included) and something instinctive on a very rare occasion, but not to make it a fucking facet of your god damn vocabulary. That is just one of many memorable things people do which annoy the ever loving piss out of me but I dont say something because I try and be ever so nice....why I dont know.
So where was I? Oh yeah.....to not conform and be completely unique stems so much elitism and groups and cliques and sub-societies it isnt funny. It becomes the name of the game to develop that sort of slice of the pie. I am probobly the winner in all of that pissing contest, I dont try either. I be me and I do not hide who I am in any way. If I like it I like it I hate I hate I am exactly whats shown when it comes to simple shit like that and noone ever will fucking understand that or even connect with me in that way and its kinda fucking fundamental if you wanna have some sort of life with friends. I did meet one person I felt that kinda thing with....and we all know what happend to her.... I feel like I am some kind of loophole, some kind of person who can beat it all on the social scale yet not even try, some kinda of pure luck which also is a curse, for this loophole if you will is recognised as so foreign in the world that accepts such malicious and wicked actions among others and dares call it the norm. I get fucked over in every which way possible and without any sort of god damn remorse.
I think God either was murdered by most of you cunt rags (Ill name names on request) or was egged on through such horrible activity to blow his own brains out.
The ironic thing is I just am better then almost everyone with a majority of things and im like 99.99999% right with a lot of shit. I dont try and its not my goal ever and to be honest I wanna be wrong, and to be normal, but also myself. I wanna have friends and feel comfortable and have things be the way thats right for a flawed but hopefully meaningful world, not how it is now with me.
I dont get it.....I just dont....so have fun with your really messed up culture and views in this rotten area...I love the parks but majority of you people need to be lobotomozed or horrible tourtured or something that will snap you out of the fucking bullshit you spit on my face with.
if you keep it up Ill start naming shit which really pisses me off....we all know how much trouble that starts.....and MaryBeth, Ill stop speaking when the world stops lying.