NEWS VS KAT-TUN
Title: NEWS VS KAT-TUN
Starring: NEWS, KAT-TUN cameo's from Kanjani8 and HSJ
Rating: PG but subject to change as Jin, Ryo and Ueda have such a wonderful way with words XD
Summary: Shounnen club proudly presents its newest segment, in which two of the biggest idol groups of the country shall face each other in the biggest battle to see who shall reign supreme.
Author's Note: This is the first time I've ever written a multi-chaptered crack-fic. I'm not even really sure it's allowed, but I'm doing it anyway!
Note #2: This is the FINAL update, I've divided this into three different parts, so just follow the link at the bottom of the entry. So yes, this is LONG. Approximately 8K words.
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone, if I did this wouldn't be fiction. It would totally happen!
Previous Chapters
Prologue
Round one:Preparations
Round one: Cosplay
Round one: Cosplay part II
Round Two: Ueda Vs Koyama
Round Two: Ueda Vs Koyama part II
Round Three: Ryo Vs ???
Round Three: Lollipop
Round Four: Surprise
Round Four: Tag-team boxing
Round Four: Ready to rumble part I
Round Four: Ready to rumble part II
Round Five: Arts and crafts
Round Five: Arts and crafts Pt. II
Round six: Battle of wits
Round six: Battle of wits part II
Jin decided he’d put his grand master plan into effect, and so found himself at the NHK studio early in the morning a good three hours earlier than was necessary.
Poking around the corner, he was rather disappointed to find that he wasn’t the only person there that early. Masuda and Shige were busily talking in hushed whispers.
Masuda looked apprehensive and Shige simply looked tired, Jin fought a pout, how was he supposed to put his awesome plan into action if he had these two poking around?
Shige probably wouldn’t let him do anything, and Masuda…well he’d stare at him funny, and Jin really didn’t want to put up with that at the moment.
He stood, contemplating the best course in action, until that is he heard Shige’s whisper, “well it only makes sense, and I’ll make sure and you get ready for the next game.”
So Shige knew what the next event would be, did he?
Shaking away all thoughts about booby traps, flying honey and falling condoms, Jin discreetly inched closer to hear what the two were saying.
“I’m not so sure, Shige,” Masuda said, doubtfully crossing his arms across his chest.
“Well neither am I, to be honest, but it’s the likeliest event,” Shige said.
“And if it is, wouldn’t it be better if I, you know acted like myself?” Masuda asked.
“Normally I’d say yes, but I’d rather not have Ryo use me as his dartboard, so I’m going to say no.”
Masuda frowned slightly, while Shige looked rather regretful, “You know I think you’re absolutely perfect,” he said, giving Masuda’s shoulder a squeeze, a light pink tinting his cheeks.
Masuda grinned, “Oh, I know,” he said.
Jin glared at the floor, he wasn’t sticking around to hear Shige try and flirt with Masuda, he wanted information!
“But you don’t have the normal taste of a girl,” Masuda went on, “so I guess it’s safe to say I should make a few changes.”
“Yeah, I don’t think girls are going to find your insane trivia and sweet bumbling as cute as I do,” Shige said, making a swift turn and resolutely walking down the hall.
“You think I’m cute?” Masuda asked, a playful grin on his face as he trailed behind.
“Did I say that? Because girls you’ll have to pick up won’t,” Shige called back.
Pick up girls?Jin thought to himself. He still wasn’t exactly sure of what the two were talking about, and ended up slowly creeping along the wall, listening for their distinct voices.
There was no strategy that didn’t entail spying on the enemy, right?
* * *
“Where the hell have you been?” Kamenashi demanded, once Jin successfully made his way into their dressing room.
“Or what the hell have you been doing?” Koki asked, taking in Jin’s sweaty and disheveled appearance.
“You haven’t been groping someone in the supply closet again, have you?” Ueda asked looking rather bored.
“No, I was being a ninja,” Jin replied.
There was absolute silence in the room.
“You’re kidding…right?” Nakamaru said, hopefully.
Ueda gave Jin one penetrating look, “no he’s definitely not kidding.”
“I was following Shige and Massu around,” Jin explained, “and I found out a ton of stuff!”
“Like?” Taguchi prompted.
“Well I think Shige may be gay for Massu,” Jin said, a pensive look on his face.
“Are you on crack?” Kamenashi asked.
“No!” Jin replied hotly.
“Are you sure?” Koki asked.
“YES!” Jin cried, “now will you listen to me?!”
“What?” Taguchi cried, excitedly.
“They figured out what the next event is going to be!”
Silence greeted this new statement, until the avalanche of noise erupted from all sides.
“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL US THIS BEFORE?” the five asked in unison.
Jin simply shrugged, “I thought Shige being gay for anyone but Koyama was more important.”
Kamenashi glowered, but decided it would be a waste to yell at Jin again, as clearly the latter was more interested in his colleague’s sex life rather than wining at this point.
“What’s the event going to be?” Koki asked.
“Something with girls, Shige figured it’d probably have to do with actually interacting with girls,” Jin explained.
Ueda nodded, “that would make a lot of sense, it’s nothing like what we’ve done before, and it’d give the fans a kick.”
There was a general murmur of agreement in the room.
“So, what are we going to do to make Nakamaru more appealing to girls?” Taguchi asked.
Kamenashi sat and stared at Nakamaru, contemplating the question, while everyone else simply eyed him.
Nakamaru could feel heat flush up his neck and the hot blood quietly pound to his head, he really didn’t like the scrutiny he was under.
“Do we really have to change anything?” he asked, eyeing Ueda hopefully.
“Oh, no you definitely need some changes,” Ueda said, “right Taguchi?”
Taguchi nodded, “we should change his clothes.”
“Yeah, dude the preppy look isn’t working for you,” Koki said, before making a bee-line to the rack of clothes on the far side of the room.
Nakamaru looked ready to argue, but was thwarted by Ueda, “you’re wearing an argyle vest, button down shirt and loafers, you’re not allowed to argue.”
Taguchi let out a small laugh, “It’s okay Nakamaru, Uepi’s just trying to help you out.”
“I’d rather he didn’t,” Nakamaru muttered, as he was presented with a pair of jeans, a t-shirt with some English words written across it, and Jin’s sneakers were being forcibly taken off.
“But they’re mine!” he whined, as Kamenashi heaved him off, and pulled the shiny converse sneakers off.
“You don’t need them.” Kamenashi said, handing the shoes off to Nakamaru.
“But Nakamaru will just stretch them out!” Jin cried. He turned his gaze to Taguchi, “Nakamaru should wear Taguchi’s shoes, they’ll bring him good luck, right?”
Nakamaru was literally speechless, a bit to preoccupied with Ueda, who was busily stripping him of his sweater and shirt.
Taguchi glanced down at his sneakers, and shrugged, “do you want to borrow them?”
Nakamaru could only manage a grunt as Ueda hastily pulled his collar off and stuffed the T-shirt on over his head.
Without hesitation, Taguchi pulled his shoes off and tossed them at Ueda, and then turned to take Jin’s shoes.
“Hey, what are you doing?” Jin asked.
“I’m putting your shoes on, you didn’t think I’d wear the loafers did you?” Taguchi said, quirking an eyebrow at Jin, clearly he was missing a few screws if he actually thought Taguchi would willing wear a pair of loafers. There was no way one could hop and run around in those without falling, although it did explain a lot about Nakamaru, now that Taguchi thought about it.
“Which means you have the great honor of wearing Nakamaru’s loafers,” Kamenashi said with a grin.
Jin really didn’t think this was fair at all.
* * *
“I’ve got to say, he doesn’t look too bad,” Ryo said, giving Masuda another look-over.
“Of course he doesn’t, Massu’s very handsome,” Koyama said.
“Obviously,” Shige muttered to himself with an eye roll, Masuda grinned sheepishly.
“But is this kind of clothes really, necessary?” Yamapi asked, staring at Masuda’s chest rather doubtfully.
“What, scared Massu’ll upstage your moobs?” Ryo asked, grinning, when Yamapi shot him a dirty look.
“Don’t worry Yamapi, no one can beat yours,” Tegoshi chirped. “Besides Massu looks really nice.”
And absolutely right he was, Massu’s handsome charms were usually hidden beneath the many long layers of multi-patterned and brightly colored clothes. For this particular event Shige had carefully picked out an entirely new outfit.
Instead of the striped green and yellow, baggy t-shirt he usually wore, Shige had given him a plain button down shirt in black. The cotton fabric, lightly accentuated his broad shoulders and toned arms.
Ryo had suggested a tight T-shirt, but Shige had shot that idea down quickly claiming the last thing they needed was to have people faint from the overload of Massu.
Masuda was quite thankful, he wasn’t exactly sure how he’d feel walking around with his long honed muscles about for everyone to see, he was much too modest for that kind of thing. It was their Leader and Koyama’s job to flaunt their manly attributes, his part was to happily sing and dance with a smile on his face, and to be frank Masuda quite preferred it that way.
Along with the rather average top, Shige had managed to coax Masuda into a pair of straight leg jeans in a pale gray, the jeans hugging his toned legs a little too much for his own comfort.
“I think he looks Korean,” Yamapi said.
The group turned to look at him, “what, he does!”
“Sorry, I don’t see how Massu, clearly Japanese looks Korean to you,” Ryo said.
“Not his face obviously, but the way he’s dressed,” Yamapi mused.
No one quite knew how to respond.
“Oh, come on, tight jeans, tight shirt, remind you of anyone?” Yamapi said.
Ryo simply blinked, Koyama however turned his eyes to Masuda again and lightly raked his eyes over his body.
“Hmmm, you do look a bit like them,” Koyama conceded.
“Exactly, you don’t see us in skin tight clothes showing off our muscles all the time,” Yamapi said.
Ryo snorted, “it’s not like anything you wear can actually hide what you have going on.”
Yamapi glared, why did it seem as though all his current conversations were somehow centered on his physique?
Tegoshi giggled, “Yamapi always looks handsome anyway.”
Masuda for one was glad all eyes were trained away from him at the moment.
* * *
“Domo!” Hikaru boomed, as he hastily stepped across the stage, waving frantically.
“We hope you’re ready for today’s show!” Yabu said, following Hikaru across the stage.
“It’s going to be so much fun!” Hikaru said.
Yabu nodded, “and we’ve got a super treat for the audience.”
“Yes we do, as Yabu said last week, we’ll be having some special MC’s for this final round,” Hikaru explained.
“And I’m sure you’re all dying to know who it is,” Yabu added.
“So we’ll let you all figure it out for yourselves,” Hikaru said, giving the audience as sly grin. It was greeted by a mixture of coo’s and pleas from the fans.
“Now, now, Hikaru let’s not tease the audience,” Yabu said, giving Hikaru a squeeze, of course eliciting a few squeals from the audience.
“But it’s fun!” Hikaru protested.
“But it’ll be even more fun when everyone’s here,” Yabu countered.
Hikaru seemed to turn the thought over in his head a few times, before nodding.
“Alright guys, come on out!” Yabu cried.
And all at once eight people trotted onto the stage, the two shortest leading the pack, and inadvertently leading to huge squeals of ‘Kawaii!’ from the audience.
Yamada grinned sheepishly, as he waved at the audience.
The group assembled neatly, the shortest few in the front, with the taller boys standing to the back. In unison they cried out, “WE ARE HEY! SAY! JUMP.”
The cries from the audience seemed all too happy.
Shige’s palm somehow met his forehead, was Johnny trying to now hold the record for greatest number of people on stage all at once?
Aside from that, were they really trying to kill the fangirls?
The cuteness of Hey! Say! JUMP, the apparent toughness from KAT-TUN and the…wackiness of NEWS all concentrated in one place, it just couldn’t lead to anything good.
“We’re so happy to be here today,” Inoo declared.
“Yes, we’re very excited to spend time with you all, and see what’s in store for Masuda-kun and Nakamaru-kun,” Takaki added.
“Speaking of which, shouldn’t we ask our guests to come out?” Yamada asked, glancing over at Yabu for direction.
“Of course,” Yabu replied.
“Alright everyone, let’s welcome our senpai,” Daiki cried.
“KAT-TUN!” Yuto boomed
“And NEWS!” Keito shouted, attempting to reach the same volume as Yuto, and failing by a small margin.
In unison KAT-TUN and NEWS trotted out, each apparently a member short.
There was a heavy roar of applause, mixed with shrieks and shouts.
“As you can see,” Yabu began.
“Each group is a member short,” Chinen said.
“Yep, that being Masuda-kun and Nakamaru-kun,” Yuto said.
There was a general nod of understanding from the audience.
“Now, I think it’s time we start the final event, right?” Hikaru said.
There was a cheer from the audience, as well as loud booms from the two groups on stage.
Tegoshi was clapping furiously, Ryo shooting looks of utter superiority at the members of KAT-TUN. Jin was practically hooting from anticipation and Taguchi was amongst the loudest of the cheerers.
Within moments a lone junior hurried across the stage, and nearly tripped on his long train in his haste, but managed to hand Inoo the envelope he held.
Koyama eyed the junior worriedly as he skittered across the stage, obviously embarrassed about his little mishap.
“Ganbatte,” Koyama called after him, receiving a rather dirty look from Ueda, that quickly shut him up.
Inoo slit the envelope open, and read the contents, with Chinen peeking over his shoulder.
“As it turns out this event will be held outside the studio,” Inoo began, impatiently allowing the audience to ‘eh?’ in confusion.
“The contestants shall have a battle of social and romantic graces, as they embark on a journey to charm and speak to as many fair young women as possible,” he read.
“That’s a really long title,” Yuto commented.
“It’s not the title, it’s the object of the game!” Ryuutaro replied exasperatedly
“Oh,” Yuto said with a nod. Ryuutaro rolled his eyes.
“What’s that mean in plain Japanese?” Daiki asked.
“It means they’ll be competing to see who behaves best with girls,” Keito explained.
“Can that even be measured?” Yamada asked incredulously
“I’m getting to that part,” Inoo said.
Ryo was getting somewhat impatient, and had to suppress his urge to take the bow in Tegoshi’s hair and throw it at one of the JUMP kids.
Yabu cast a furtive glance at Ryo, and another at Ueda, before cutting into the slight bickering. “Let’s just let Inoo finish the reading,” he suggested.
Inoo smiled and continued his reading, “The two contestants will have to gain as many modes of communication from the fair young women as possible, the winner shall be he, who gains as many as possible.”
“Which means?” Chinen prompted.
“The idol that gets the most phone numbers, or e-mail addresses will be King!” Shige muttered to himself. There was a general exchange of looks between the five members, as Keito translated the message into a much more appropriate form.
“As such, the event will be shot through live-feed and broadcasted right here,” Inoo said, pointing at the screen from behind.
The screen lit up to focus on Nakamaru and Masuda.
The audience screamed, obviously very taken with the new looks the two idols were sporting, none really noting the almost identical looks of utter shock and fear etched on their faces.
Next
Starring: NEWS, KAT-TUN cameo's from Kanjani8 and HSJ
Rating: PG but subject to change as Jin, Ryo and Ueda have such a wonderful way with words XD
Summary: Shounnen club proudly presents its newest segment, in which two of the biggest idol groups of the country shall face each other in the biggest battle to see who shall reign supreme.
Author's Note: This is the first time I've ever written a multi-chaptered crack-fic. I'm not even really sure it's allowed, but I'm doing it anyway!
Note #2: This is the FINAL update, I've divided this into three different parts, so just follow the link at the bottom of the entry. So yes, this is LONG. Approximately 8K words.
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone, if I did this wouldn't be fiction. It would totally happen!
Previous Chapters
Prologue
Round one:Preparations
Round one: Cosplay
Round one: Cosplay part II
Round Two: Ueda Vs Koyama
Round Two: Ueda Vs Koyama part II
Round Three: Ryo Vs ???
Round Three: Lollipop
Round Four: Surprise
Round Four: Tag-team boxing
Round Four: Ready to rumble part I
Round Four: Ready to rumble part II
Round Five: Arts and crafts
Round Five: Arts and crafts Pt. II
Round six: Battle of wits
Round six: Battle of wits part II
Jin decided he’d put his grand master plan into effect, and so found himself at the NHK studio early in the morning a good three hours earlier than was necessary.
Poking around the corner, he was rather disappointed to find that he wasn’t the only person there that early. Masuda and Shige were busily talking in hushed whispers.
Masuda looked apprehensive and Shige simply looked tired, Jin fought a pout, how was he supposed to put his awesome plan into action if he had these two poking around?
Shige probably wouldn’t let him do anything, and Masuda…well he’d stare at him funny, and Jin really didn’t want to put up with that at the moment.
He stood, contemplating the best course in action, until that is he heard Shige’s whisper, “well it only makes sense, and I’ll make sure and you get ready for the next game.”
So Shige knew what the next event would be, did he?
Shaking away all thoughts about booby traps, flying honey and falling condoms, Jin discreetly inched closer to hear what the two were saying.
“I’m not so sure, Shige,” Masuda said, doubtfully crossing his arms across his chest.
“Well neither am I, to be honest, but it’s the likeliest event,” Shige said.
“And if it is, wouldn’t it be better if I, you know acted like myself?” Masuda asked.
“Normally I’d say yes, but I’d rather not have Ryo use me as his dartboard, so I’m going to say no.”
Masuda frowned slightly, while Shige looked rather regretful, “You know I think you’re absolutely perfect,” he said, giving Masuda’s shoulder a squeeze, a light pink tinting his cheeks.
Masuda grinned, “Oh, I know,” he said.
Jin glared at the floor, he wasn’t sticking around to hear Shige try and flirt with Masuda, he wanted information!
“But you don’t have the normal taste of a girl,” Masuda went on, “so I guess it’s safe to say I should make a few changes.”
“Yeah, I don’t think girls are going to find your insane trivia and sweet bumbling as cute as I do,” Shige said, making a swift turn and resolutely walking down the hall.
“You think I’m cute?” Masuda asked, a playful grin on his face as he trailed behind.
“Did I say that? Because girls you’ll have to pick up won’t,” Shige called back.
Pick up girls?Jin thought to himself. He still wasn’t exactly sure of what the two were talking about, and ended up slowly creeping along the wall, listening for their distinct voices.
There was no strategy that didn’t entail spying on the enemy, right?
* * *
“Where the hell have you been?” Kamenashi demanded, once Jin successfully made his way into their dressing room.
“Or what the hell have you been doing?” Koki asked, taking in Jin’s sweaty and disheveled appearance.
“You haven’t been groping someone in the supply closet again, have you?” Ueda asked looking rather bored.
“No, I was being a ninja,” Jin replied.
There was absolute silence in the room.
“You’re kidding…right?” Nakamaru said, hopefully.
Ueda gave Jin one penetrating look, “no he’s definitely not kidding.”
“I was following Shige and Massu around,” Jin explained, “and I found out a ton of stuff!”
“Like?” Taguchi prompted.
“Well I think Shige may be gay for Massu,” Jin said, a pensive look on his face.
“Are you on crack?” Kamenashi asked.
“No!” Jin replied hotly.
“Are you sure?” Koki asked.
“YES!” Jin cried, “now will you listen to me?!”
“What?” Taguchi cried, excitedly.
“They figured out what the next event is going to be!”
Silence greeted this new statement, until the avalanche of noise erupted from all sides.
“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL US THIS BEFORE?” the five asked in unison.
Jin simply shrugged, “I thought Shige being gay for anyone but Koyama was more important.”
Kamenashi glowered, but decided it would be a waste to yell at Jin again, as clearly the latter was more interested in his colleague’s sex life rather than wining at this point.
“What’s the event going to be?” Koki asked.
“Something with girls, Shige figured it’d probably have to do with actually interacting with girls,” Jin explained.
Ueda nodded, “that would make a lot of sense, it’s nothing like what we’ve done before, and it’d give the fans a kick.”
There was a general murmur of agreement in the room.
“So, what are we going to do to make Nakamaru more appealing to girls?” Taguchi asked.
Kamenashi sat and stared at Nakamaru, contemplating the question, while everyone else simply eyed him.
Nakamaru could feel heat flush up his neck and the hot blood quietly pound to his head, he really didn’t like the scrutiny he was under.
“Do we really have to change anything?” he asked, eyeing Ueda hopefully.
“Oh, no you definitely need some changes,” Ueda said, “right Taguchi?”
Taguchi nodded, “we should change his clothes.”
“Yeah, dude the preppy look isn’t working for you,” Koki said, before making a bee-line to the rack of clothes on the far side of the room.
Nakamaru looked ready to argue, but was thwarted by Ueda, “you’re wearing an argyle vest, button down shirt and loafers, you’re not allowed to argue.”
Taguchi let out a small laugh, “It’s okay Nakamaru, Uepi’s just trying to help you out.”
“I’d rather he didn’t,” Nakamaru muttered, as he was presented with a pair of jeans, a t-shirt with some English words written across it, and Jin’s sneakers were being forcibly taken off.
“But they’re mine!” he whined, as Kamenashi heaved him off, and pulled the shiny converse sneakers off.
“You don’t need them.” Kamenashi said, handing the shoes off to Nakamaru.
“But Nakamaru will just stretch them out!” Jin cried. He turned his gaze to Taguchi, “Nakamaru should wear Taguchi’s shoes, they’ll bring him good luck, right?”
Nakamaru was literally speechless, a bit to preoccupied with Ueda, who was busily stripping him of his sweater and shirt.
Taguchi glanced down at his sneakers, and shrugged, “do you want to borrow them?”
Nakamaru could only manage a grunt as Ueda hastily pulled his collar off and stuffed the T-shirt on over his head.
Without hesitation, Taguchi pulled his shoes off and tossed them at Ueda, and then turned to take Jin’s shoes.
“Hey, what are you doing?” Jin asked.
“I’m putting your shoes on, you didn’t think I’d wear the loafers did you?” Taguchi said, quirking an eyebrow at Jin, clearly he was missing a few screws if he actually thought Taguchi would willing wear a pair of loafers. There was no way one could hop and run around in those without falling, although it did explain a lot about Nakamaru, now that Taguchi thought about it.
“Which means you have the great honor of wearing Nakamaru’s loafers,” Kamenashi said with a grin.
Jin really didn’t think this was fair at all.
* * *
“I’ve got to say, he doesn’t look too bad,” Ryo said, giving Masuda another look-over.
“Of course he doesn’t, Massu’s very handsome,” Koyama said.
“Obviously,” Shige muttered to himself with an eye roll, Masuda grinned sheepishly.
“But is this kind of clothes really, necessary?” Yamapi asked, staring at Masuda’s chest rather doubtfully.
“What, scared Massu’ll upstage your moobs?” Ryo asked, grinning, when Yamapi shot him a dirty look.
“Don’t worry Yamapi, no one can beat yours,” Tegoshi chirped. “Besides Massu looks really nice.”
And absolutely right he was, Massu’s handsome charms were usually hidden beneath the many long layers of multi-patterned and brightly colored clothes. For this particular event Shige had carefully picked out an entirely new outfit.
Instead of the striped green and yellow, baggy t-shirt he usually wore, Shige had given him a plain button down shirt in black. The cotton fabric, lightly accentuated his broad shoulders and toned arms.
Ryo had suggested a tight T-shirt, but Shige had shot that idea down quickly claiming the last thing they needed was to have people faint from the overload of Massu.
Masuda was quite thankful, he wasn’t exactly sure how he’d feel walking around with his long honed muscles about for everyone to see, he was much too modest for that kind of thing. It was their Leader and Koyama’s job to flaunt their manly attributes, his part was to happily sing and dance with a smile on his face, and to be frank Masuda quite preferred it that way.
Along with the rather average top, Shige had managed to coax Masuda into a pair of straight leg jeans in a pale gray, the jeans hugging his toned legs a little too much for his own comfort.
“I think he looks Korean,” Yamapi said.
The group turned to look at him, “what, he does!”
“Sorry, I don’t see how Massu, clearly Japanese looks Korean to you,” Ryo said.
“Not his face obviously, but the way he’s dressed,” Yamapi mused.
No one quite knew how to respond.
“Oh, come on, tight jeans, tight shirt, remind you of anyone?” Yamapi said.
Ryo simply blinked, Koyama however turned his eyes to Masuda again and lightly raked his eyes over his body.
“Hmmm, you do look a bit like them,” Koyama conceded.
“Exactly, you don’t see us in skin tight clothes showing off our muscles all the time,” Yamapi said.
Ryo snorted, “it’s not like anything you wear can actually hide what you have going on.”
Yamapi glared, why did it seem as though all his current conversations were somehow centered on his physique?
Tegoshi giggled, “Yamapi always looks handsome anyway.”
Masuda for one was glad all eyes were trained away from him at the moment.
* * *
“Domo!” Hikaru boomed, as he hastily stepped across the stage, waving frantically.
“We hope you’re ready for today’s show!” Yabu said, following Hikaru across the stage.
“It’s going to be so much fun!” Hikaru said.
Yabu nodded, “and we’ve got a super treat for the audience.”
“Yes we do, as Yabu said last week, we’ll be having some special MC’s for this final round,” Hikaru explained.
“And I’m sure you’re all dying to know who it is,” Yabu added.
“So we’ll let you all figure it out for yourselves,” Hikaru said, giving the audience as sly grin. It was greeted by a mixture of coo’s and pleas from the fans.
“Now, now, Hikaru let’s not tease the audience,” Yabu said, giving Hikaru a squeeze, of course eliciting a few squeals from the audience.
“But it’s fun!” Hikaru protested.
“But it’ll be even more fun when everyone’s here,” Yabu countered.
Hikaru seemed to turn the thought over in his head a few times, before nodding.
“Alright guys, come on out!” Yabu cried.
And all at once eight people trotted onto the stage, the two shortest leading the pack, and inadvertently leading to huge squeals of ‘Kawaii!’ from the audience.
Yamada grinned sheepishly, as he waved at the audience.
The group assembled neatly, the shortest few in the front, with the taller boys standing to the back. In unison they cried out, “WE ARE HEY! SAY! JUMP.”
The cries from the audience seemed all too happy.
Shige’s palm somehow met his forehead, was Johnny trying to now hold the record for greatest number of people on stage all at once?
Aside from that, were they really trying to kill the fangirls?
The cuteness of Hey! Say! JUMP, the apparent toughness from KAT-TUN and the…wackiness of NEWS all concentrated in one place, it just couldn’t lead to anything good.
“We’re so happy to be here today,” Inoo declared.
“Yes, we’re very excited to spend time with you all, and see what’s in store for Masuda-kun and Nakamaru-kun,” Takaki added.
“Speaking of which, shouldn’t we ask our guests to come out?” Yamada asked, glancing over at Yabu for direction.
“Of course,” Yabu replied.
“Alright everyone, let’s welcome our senpai,” Daiki cried.
“KAT-TUN!” Yuto boomed
“And NEWS!” Keito shouted, attempting to reach the same volume as Yuto, and failing by a small margin.
In unison KAT-TUN and NEWS trotted out, each apparently a member short.
There was a heavy roar of applause, mixed with shrieks and shouts.
“As you can see,” Yabu began.
“Each group is a member short,” Chinen said.
“Yep, that being Masuda-kun and Nakamaru-kun,” Yuto said.
There was a general nod of understanding from the audience.
“Now, I think it’s time we start the final event, right?” Hikaru said.
There was a cheer from the audience, as well as loud booms from the two groups on stage.
Tegoshi was clapping furiously, Ryo shooting looks of utter superiority at the members of KAT-TUN. Jin was practically hooting from anticipation and Taguchi was amongst the loudest of the cheerers.
Within moments a lone junior hurried across the stage, and nearly tripped on his long train in his haste, but managed to hand Inoo the envelope he held.
Koyama eyed the junior worriedly as he skittered across the stage, obviously embarrassed about his little mishap.
“Ganbatte,” Koyama called after him, receiving a rather dirty look from Ueda, that quickly shut him up.
Inoo slit the envelope open, and read the contents, with Chinen peeking over his shoulder.
“As it turns out this event will be held outside the studio,” Inoo began, impatiently allowing the audience to ‘eh?’ in confusion.
“The contestants shall have a battle of social and romantic graces, as they embark on a journey to charm and speak to as many fair young women as possible,” he read.
“That’s a really long title,” Yuto commented.
“It’s not the title, it’s the object of the game!” Ryuutaro replied exasperatedly
“Oh,” Yuto said with a nod. Ryuutaro rolled his eyes.
“What’s that mean in plain Japanese?” Daiki asked.
“It means they’ll be competing to see who behaves best with girls,” Keito explained.
“Can that even be measured?” Yamada asked incredulously
“I’m getting to that part,” Inoo said.
Ryo was getting somewhat impatient, and had to suppress his urge to take the bow in Tegoshi’s hair and throw it at one of the JUMP kids.
Yabu cast a furtive glance at Ryo, and another at Ueda, before cutting into the slight bickering. “Let’s just let Inoo finish the reading,” he suggested.
Inoo smiled and continued his reading, “The two contestants will have to gain as many modes of communication from the fair young women as possible, the winner shall be he, who gains as many as possible.”
“Which means?” Chinen prompted.
“The idol that gets the most phone numbers, or e-mail addresses will be King!” Shige muttered to himself. There was a general exchange of looks between the five members, as Keito translated the message into a much more appropriate form.
“As such, the event will be shot through live-feed and broadcasted right here,” Inoo said, pointing at the screen from behind.
The screen lit up to focus on Nakamaru and Masuda.
The audience screamed, obviously very taken with the new looks the two idols were sporting, none really noting the almost identical looks of utter shock and fear etched on their faces.
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