Sometime it all just sucks too much.
I sit here at 1 am in my room too fearful to go downstairs, because I might wake my brothers child. So I must quench my thirst by drinking water from the bathroom sink. Honestly I don't know why I have to put up with it, is it not my house? I dunno I'm not annoy or angry at my brother or my niece, or shit not even my sister-in-law. It just seems with their being here I have to change my routine or even the way I act. I don't like that. I like doing my thing, my way, my time, even if in the end I do it and it fucks me up at least i did it my way. Oh you say "but silly teenage boy you can not always have it your way," and you would be right. I can live with compromise which I can get usually from anyone however this quality does not seem to work on my family.
I had this dream it was weird. I went to the movies with my girlfriend but ALL the seats were facing away from the screen, like side ways. Then this girl I know from school comes in, and I say hi and she kisses me for no reason, then all the seats move and she disappears, my girlfriend doesn't seem to care and then...... I woke up. After that I thought about what it meant and I just think its a lustful dream nothing more. I know my girl might read this and she'll be either hurt or mad, but if I did not tell her I would feel like I was hiding something which I'm not. A dream is a dream unless you tell it to a shrink.
My girl is so good to me, sometime I wish I could spend more time with her but we do spend a good amount together. Shes so sweet the other day she was trying figure out what I liked, what I wanted from life, just something I desired. All I want is peace ,not world peace, but inner tranquil peace. Too bad you can't go buy that in the store you have to find it. (maybe I can buy the map to it) But you know something thanks to my girl I'm closing in on the whole peace thing. When I just lay with her and look into her eye I feel this peaceful calm feeling run through me, a feeling I wish I could bottle and use when I needed it. I dunno if she knows how I feel about her, I dunno if she knows their true feelings. I dunno I think I should tell her more often how I feel there and then and not wait a week later.
I don't belive in god or heaven, and I know if there is such a place I'm probably not going to get into it. But this is how I picture it..... a beach ALL PURE SUGAR WHITE sand, the water all shades of blue and some greens, but yet when you get in you can see your feet. There will be a palm tree right in the perfect spot, not to far from the water not too close, you'll have fish swimming with you and at night you can SEE ALL THE STARs in the sky, there will be a full moon reflecting off the ocean (unless you don't like the moon) and have dolphins jumping and shimmering in the moon light. And on very special nights the ocean will glow with those pretty fishes which glow in the dark, there will never be a shark attack and you can stay in a house only a few yards away from you tree. Thats my heaven. My hell.... I dunno if I'm not alone I can make it into an ok situation but thats me.
Well this post was mostly a rant, it was a way to have people get to know me and a way to tell my girl how much I love her without having to say it. I gotta go now, I hope all who read this have their dream of heaven come true.
I had this dream it was weird. I went to the movies with my girlfriend but ALL the seats were facing away from the screen, like side ways. Then this girl I know from school comes in, and I say hi and she kisses me for no reason, then all the seats move and she disappears, my girlfriend doesn't seem to care and then...... I woke up. After that I thought about what it meant and I just think its a lustful dream nothing more. I know my girl might read this and she'll be either hurt or mad, but if I did not tell her I would feel like I was hiding something which I'm not. A dream is a dream unless you tell it to a shrink.
My girl is so good to me, sometime I wish I could spend more time with her but we do spend a good amount together. Shes so sweet the other day she was trying figure out what I liked, what I wanted from life, just something I desired. All I want is peace ,not world peace, but inner tranquil peace. Too bad you can't go buy that in the store you have to find it. (maybe I can buy the map to it) But you know something thanks to my girl I'm closing in on the whole peace thing. When I just lay with her and look into her eye I feel this peaceful calm feeling run through me, a feeling I wish I could bottle and use when I needed it. I dunno if she knows how I feel about her, I dunno if she knows their true feelings. I dunno I think I should tell her more often how I feel there and then and not wait a week later.
I don't belive in god or heaven, and I know if there is such a place I'm probably not going to get into it. But this is how I picture it..... a beach ALL PURE SUGAR WHITE sand, the water all shades of blue and some greens, but yet when you get in you can see your feet. There will be a palm tree right in the perfect spot, not to far from the water not too close, you'll have fish swimming with you and at night you can SEE ALL THE STARs in the sky, there will be a full moon reflecting off the ocean (unless you don't like the moon) and have dolphins jumping and shimmering in the moon light. And on very special nights the ocean will glow with those pretty fishes which glow in the dark, there will never be a shark attack and you can stay in a house only a few yards away from you tree. Thats my heaven. My hell.... I dunno if I'm not alone I can make it into an ok situation but thats me.
Well this post was mostly a rant, it was a way to have people get to know me and a way to tell my girl how much I love her without having to say it. I gotta go now, I hope all who read this have their dream of heaven come true.