The slow descent into apathetic surrender of life
Job search is not going well. At all. I would even go so far as to say it's going quite terrible.
I'm starting to get depressed and very scared about the future. I look at job listings, but gloss over so many thinking that I'm not qualified. Because I'm not. Every single one is really the same:
3-5+ Years experience with [Skill I've never used professionally]
The only logical conclusion is that I am a Failure™. I, apparently, have few - if any - marketable skills. And apparently I've already exhausted the list of companies who actually want the few skills I do have.
It's very frustrating going through job listings and eliminating a third of them because you've already applied there.
It's harder and harder to have the energy and motivation to DO anything anymore. Read? Why bother. Work on various projects? Meh, too tired. Sleep? Too Anxious/Scared to actually GET to sleep. And then when I do, in the morning I don't have the energy or willpower to drag myself out of bed.
I'm probably one or two more rejections away from just curling up in my closet and letting myself just wither away to nothing. Which isn't actually all that far away, because I'm barely eating as-is.
One can only blame the economy, or the end of the year, or whatever so much. At some point I just have to face the fact that I am a complete failure. I just suck at this whole "life" thing, and really don't deserve to have it anymore.
I'm starting to get depressed and very scared about the future. I look at job listings, but gloss over so many thinking that I'm not qualified. Because I'm not. Every single one is really the same:
3-5+ Years experience with [Skill I've never used professionally]
The only logical conclusion is that I am a Failure™. I, apparently, have few - if any - marketable skills. And apparently I've already exhausted the list of companies who actually want the few skills I do have.
It's very frustrating going through job listings and eliminating a third of them because you've already applied there.
It's harder and harder to have the energy and motivation to DO anything anymore. Read? Why bother. Work on various projects? Meh, too tired. Sleep? Too Anxious/Scared to actually GET to sleep. And then when I do, in the morning I don't have the energy or willpower to drag myself out of bed.
I'm probably one or two more rejections away from just curling up in my closet and letting myself just wither away to nothing. Which isn't actually all that far away, because I'm barely eating as-is.
One can only blame the economy, or the end of the year, or whatever so much. At some point I just have to face the fact that I am a complete failure. I just suck at this whole "life" thing, and really don't deserve to have it anymore.