queen b take it
i've had a really bizarre weekend. quite literally an emotional roller coaster. unfortunately, i can't be totally candid about it, which i think is why i was having such a hard time dealing with it all. i really just wanted someone to talk to, and there wasn't anyone available that didn't have a stake in things. i found myself wandering okcupid seeing if i could just find someone to chat with and dump all my issues on. but that just seemed mean. but i'm out of the woods now. sort of.
let's start with the bad stuff. actually, i'll probably have to do this in chronological order but whatever. i've spent two weeks with aliquant and each day there was less and less to do, to the point where friday was painfully boring. i never thought i would run out of ways to get the internet to entertain me, but there was only so many overthinkingit articles i could read before my eyes started to fall out of my head. so about forty minutes after i got out of work friday i get a call - which i missed - from office team. the voice mail sounded bad but i wasn't able to get back to them before they left for the week. so i spent the weekend wondering if i would have a job on monday. i don't. *sigh* but that's alright. if i got one long term position, i can get another, and at least it gave me a good excuse to leave target and not look back because i had every intention of leaving anyway. besides, technically the position is on "hold" so when things pick up again for them, and hopefully they will, i can get it back.
on the up sides of said roller coaster, my cousin uli got married to his long time partner bill. and i can effectively call them my gay uncles now (uli's my second cousin - i think, what's it called when their actually your parent's cousin? - but i like saying uncle). i couldn't help but smile stupidly during the ceremony, it was all so sweet. but with all the stress and crazy thoughts that were going through my head i made for a very down party-goer. but at least i got to dance to "alejandro."
sunday i was starting to feel a lot better, my hormonal bubble popped finally and even though i was still dealing with cramps i was mentally in a better space. it also helped that i got to tour new haven with a cool guy. once we exhausted the street sights we went to see salt, which was surprisingly good. it was a bit like spy porn, i wasn't paying attention to all the ridiculous physical feats, but the more espionage type stuff i enjoyed. so it was a suprisingly weekend in many ways.
so office team says they're going to do their best to keep me busy, but even so i have nothing to do at the moment and that's kind of upsetting for me. i liked being an office, i liked working 8 to 5 even though it made me hate the computer by the end of day and drowsy during my free time. dad suggested i work on some personal projects, which is a good idea, i've been reading a lot so many i can muster up the motivation to finish one of my short stories. and apply to more jobs. since i updated my resume i've been getting a couple random calls from employers. nothing interesting, to be honest, i like to think of it that there is just as much opportunity in the world as there was two weeks ago. i can't give up now.
let's start with the bad stuff. actually, i'll probably have to do this in chronological order but whatever. i've spent two weeks with aliquant and each day there was less and less to do, to the point where friday was painfully boring. i never thought i would run out of ways to get the internet to entertain me, but there was only so many overthinkingit articles i could read before my eyes started to fall out of my head. so about forty minutes after i got out of work friday i get a call - which i missed - from office team. the voice mail sounded bad but i wasn't able to get back to them before they left for the week. so i spent the weekend wondering if i would have a job on monday. i don't. *sigh* but that's alright. if i got one long term position, i can get another, and at least it gave me a good excuse to leave target and not look back because i had every intention of leaving anyway. besides, technically the position is on "hold" so when things pick up again for them, and hopefully they will, i can get it back.
on the up sides of said roller coaster, my cousin uli got married to his long time partner bill. and i can effectively call them my gay uncles now (uli's my second cousin - i think, what's it called when their actually your parent's cousin? - but i like saying uncle). i couldn't help but smile stupidly during the ceremony, it was all so sweet. but with all the stress and crazy thoughts that were going through my head i made for a very down party-goer. but at least i got to dance to "alejandro."
sunday i was starting to feel a lot better, my hormonal bubble popped finally and even though i was still dealing with cramps i was mentally in a better space. it also helped that i got to tour new haven with a cool guy. once we exhausted the street sights we went to see salt, which was surprisingly good. it was a bit like spy porn, i wasn't paying attention to all the ridiculous physical feats, but the more espionage type stuff i enjoyed. so it was a suprisingly weekend in many ways.
so office team says they're going to do their best to keep me busy, but even so i have nothing to do at the moment and that's kind of upsetting for me. i liked being an office, i liked working 8 to 5 even though it made me hate the computer by the end of day and drowsy during my free time. dad suggested i work on some personal projects, which is a good idea, i've been reading a lot so many i can muster up the motivation to finish one of my short stories. and apply to more jobs. since i updated my resume i've been getting a couple random calls from employers. nothing interesting, to be honest, i like to think of it that there is just as much opportunity in the world as there was two weeks ago. i can't give up now.