but i won't let this build up inside of me
i'm confused when i should be happy. i was buzzing on thoughts of a teenage sex pot, and now i'm being treated and flattered. i'm not getting soft, that's the problem. i like being challenged and provoked, i don't know what to do with this. i know what i could do, and i'm thinking i might regret it. that's what it is, that's why i'm confused.
i'm developing a cold. i was developing a cold and now i have one. i've been wondering what it would be like to be sick enough to stay in bed. i'm so congested that i'll most likely be able to annoy plenty of people in class tomorrow. i have a quiz in theater appreciation tomorrow, and i think it's just on medea but i'm not sure, which means i could be studying but i'd rather do this. i promised myself i'd do my nails today but i forgot. i also promised myself i would study astronomy and history and the driver's manual. i didn't.
i'm wavering. i don't want to go back, i don't want to look at him. i'm telling myself to just go with the flow. i wish i could just eat this up. i haven't been able to feel like myself. my thoughts haven't changed, i haven't changed. i wish i could be myself and enjoy this, but the two don't fall into place, correlate. i don't hate what this does to me, it just doesn't make sense. no one can be owned, but we want it so badly. is it natural, or uncivilized? perhaps that's want. it doesn't make sense, and i can't put it to words. it's an old battle with new players.
i'm developing a cold. i was developing a cold and now i have one. i've been wondering what it would be like to be sick enough to stay in bed. i'm so congested that i'll most likely be able to annoy plenty of people in class tomorrow. i have a quiz in theater appreciation tomorrow, and i think it's just on medea but i'm not sure, which means i could be studying but i'd rather do this. i promised myself i'd do my nails today but i forgot. i also promised myself i would study astronomy and history and the driver's manual. i didn't.
i'm wavering. i don't want to go back, i don't want to look at him. i'm telling myself to just go with the flow. i wish i could just eat this up. i haven't been able to feel like myself. my thoughts haven't changed, i haven't changed. i wish i could be myself and enjoy this, but the two don't fall into place, correlate. i don't hate what this does to me, it just doesn't make sense. no one can be owned, but we want it so badly. is it natural, or uncivilized? perhaps that's want. it doesn't make sense, and i can't put it to words. it's an old battle with new players.