(no subject)
I need 2 stop acting like a child i'm firstly a women and i'm 16 yrs. old i need to start acting my own age. But, i still can't change the way i feel..i feel like sumone crushed my heart and left me there 2 rot...i feel lonely and hurt...i can't sleep...and when i'm upset i eat and and eat and eat now everyone knows y i'm over weight evere think y?! Well now u know! I think everything is my fault..my cat Bonzii dieing my family SPLITTING APART..my brother not being able to hang out with me any more..my dad being sick and all..y me and my family r seperate and far away from my loving family in croatia...for hurting people cuz i'm hurt too and thatz the only way i can get rid of sum of my pain...my life is always seems to be in ruins sit ons the floor kneeling about to spit up tears begging for sumone to help her but like always no one listens to her crys. Cuz know ones know her from the inside. Y didn't end this life a long time ago i shouldn't be here i just make everything wrong upset and hrut everyone and including myself! I would of given everything away on that christmas i would of gave EVERYTHING ALL MY PRESANT ALL YM HAPPINESS ALL MY JOY OF BEING WITH MY FAMILY JUST 2 HAVE UU YES U MY WORLD MY LOVE MY EVERYTHING THATZ ALL I WANTED 4 CHRISTMAS IS U BY MY SIDE..U THERE 2 CARE 4 ME AND LOVE ME BACK...*crysso loudly* but i didn't feel any love...none at all. I don't y did i do sumthing wrong *crys sum more and begs 4 u to tell me* PLEASE cuz i have been thinking about it all daya nd all night thatz all i keep thinking "Did i do sumthing wrong for him not to love me?!" please don't let it be truei feel my world falling apart and me including. Every breath i take is just a waste let me hold it back and not waste any more. Every tear is another tear of emotions i have 4 u any every time i beg on my knees is the amount of times i felt u didn't have love 4 me. i'm scared..i'm lonely...i just don't know what 2 do i don't know what 2 say i only feel i only see and hear. I want to close my eyes and wish it would all go away but it won't so i cry and cry sum more. Tell me please this is all i want to know "Did i do sumthing, did i do sumthing wrong?"...I'm sry 4 ruining ur life and making ur sis jelious i don't want that i love and her i love u both i want the best 4 us all i want u guys 2 have that bond NEVER lose it. *tears stop* But happens when life ends and ur world is really gone?! <-- a question that never will be answered!