God is good...but will He listen...
"You have such piercing blue eyes." "I love your hair." "You understand me better than anyone." "How is it that you can read me so well." "You speak poetry." "It's not like your looking into my eyes, it's like your looking into ME." "You remind so much of my ex-faience/boy friend." ...That's what they say to me, my friends. I am soooooooo "poetic." I am soooooooooo "sensitive." I am sooooooooooooooo "mysterious." I am a "beautiful man." But you know what, so were their boyfriends. Serious boyfriends, faiences, soulmates, best friends...all of whom broke the hearts of these girls. So what does this mean? It means that they think they can read my next move. "I can see so much of what i adored in my ex-boyfriend in you. But he hurt me so much." I love it. I love having a record for a track i never ran! It just hurts ME. They are beautiful, charming, thoughtful, quality girls more than worth their salt. And they see me and think of their ex's. There is a girl here who, when i first got here, captivated me. She's tall and has long dark brown hair. She has a smile that would charm a cobra out of it's hood. Se was the first friend i made here. The night of the day we met, we went for a walk on the beach together and talked about everything. We had one of those heart-to-hearts that builds a strong bridge between them. I felt incredible that night. She was the first girl i had really "connected" with after Amanda. There was just something about her. That night was the last night we ever spoke. From then on, she ignored me. The next day she started going around with another crowd. I would say "hi" or try to sit with her at lunch or hang out or whatever, but to find full tables, she was with another guy, or just "too busy." I reminded her of he ex. She was the first of these girls to tell me. When she looked into my eyes, i felt like a little boy. She made me blush, and that was uniquely wonderful. But then she dropped me like a Jew would a ham sandwich. And that hurt, um, alot. That was in August. Then a few weeks ago, i learned that it turns out after me, this girl had done the same thing to about seven other guys here. They had the heart-to-hearts, earned their affection and promptly dropped them. I was officially another name in the hat...which was insult to injury. Today she came up and thanked me for the poem i wrote her. I wrote this poem that day we met. She was in te library, where we met, and i was sitting across from her. During a pause in the conversation, she started to read and my Muse began to speak to me. Her eyes, and the way she looked at me enchanted me. I wrote and wrote and wrote about her. She wanted to see it and so i gave it to her. And now, months later, she thanked me for it because it inspired her to write something that helped one of her friends. I am already mad at this girl for what i felt was using, not only me, but my brothers here. But her eyes hav'nt lost their magic. All i could do was look at her and say "thank you for looking at me." And I walked away. But she re-opened that wound. Your so wonderful...so was my ex boyfriend. I'm sorry, my dear woman, i don't fit into that mold.