A tribute to my sister
So if you've ever read my LJ, which assuming you're reading this one, you've probably read before, then you pretty much know my relationship with my family doesn't differ too far from Lorelai Gilmore's.
My mother is literally my own Emily Gilmore minus the money. Anything that Emily has ever used to berate Lorelai works between the two of us and then some. And, like Lorelai, I just keep going back for more. I have escaped, I live over two hours away but I just can't seem to cut it off because i just hope that one day she'll be proud of me, one day she'll love me, she'll treat me like any other mother would.
My father isn't far different from Richard Gilmore. I know he loves me but he's never really been a big presence in my life. More of the absent type. And, like Lorelai, all I want is to be a Daddy's girl but I just can't seem to get close enough.
Thankfully, unlike Lorelai, I have my sister Jennifer. Who is just the most amazing person ever. When we were little we never got along, I was jealous of the fact that because she has Crohn's Disease she was everyone's favorite and basically always got her way (a little unusual for the older child). And I know she was jealous because of how easily I would escape and my intullectual smarts. But now that we've grown up, I think since we've both moved away and become our own people we've gotten a lot closer. In fact at my sister's wedding her friends were telling me that sometimes when she's around them she can't stop talking about how proud she is of me. And it's just... it's wonderful. (I'm starting to tear up as I write this.)
My sister isn't as smart as I am, we'll both admit it, and she has this chronic illness and she's just had so many things go wrong in her life but when I look at her life I'm in awe. She has this great husband who's so good to her and her husband's family treats her like their own. In fact when I go stay with her, they treat me as part of their family as wel. She has this job she loves working with children as a physical therapist and she's put her illness into remission. She's so strong and wonderful and I'm just so lucky to have a sister like her or just a friend like her. I think sometimes she doesn't know how much I appreciate just a phone call from her or how she sends me cards to say how happy she is for me even for the littlest things.
Anyways the reason I'm writing this is that my sister called the other day and she said she knows how much I'm not really excited about my birthday this year. All this stuff with J is bugging me and I'm so worried about the big test coming up and so much is just going on I feel like the world is spinning too fast. She called and suggested that if I drive home the weekend before my birthday then she'll drive there too (Cleveland is right between where we live) and she and A (her husband) will celebrate my birthday with me. I don't know why but it just hit me with how sweet it was for her to suddenly decide to change her plans and meet me in Cleveland for what seems to be a very no-so-special birthday, after all she's coming in for this big family thing in April right before I go stay with her and then again at the end of May for Memorial Day Weekend.
I think I just feel so bad sometimes that i'm not a better sister to her. I'm pretty forgetful. I always remember her birthday but I've gotten so sidetracked that I haven't bought her Chanukah present yet although I know what I'm getting her. I don't really go out of my way to see her on her birthday. I feel sometimes like I understand why she's everyone's favorite, she really deserves to be. And this wonderful life she has, she so deserves that too.
For those who are still reading, I hope that each of you has someone in your life that touches you, reaches out to you, supports you like my sister does for me. And I would love to hear all about it!
~~~~~~~~~~~~
ETA: And I'm stupid and I realized I just should have added this on last night. But a huge happy birthday to
aggieshan08! You're not actually in town anyways but that doesn't mean I don't remember your birthday girl!
My mother is literally my own Emily Gilmore minus the money. Anything that Emily has ever used to berate Lorelai works between the two of us and then some. And, like Lorelai, I just keep going back for more. I have escaped, I live over two hours away but I just can't seem to cut it off because i just hope that one day she'll be proud of me, one day she'll love me, she'll treat me like any other mother would.
My father isn't far different from Richard Gilmore. I know he loves me but he's never really been a big presence in my life. More of the absent type. And, like Lorelai, all I want is to be a Daddy's girl but I just can't seem to get close enough.
Thankfully, unlike Lorelai, I have my sister Jennifer. Who is just the most amazing person ever. When we were little we never got along, I was jealous of the fact that because she has Crohn's Disease she was everyone's favorite and basically always got her way (a little unusual for the older child). And I know she was jealous because of how easily I would escape and my intullectual smarts. But now that we've grown up, I think since we've both moved away and become our own people we've gotten a lot closer. In fact at my sister's wedding her friends were telling me that sometimes when she's around them she can't stop talking about how proud she is of me. And it's just... it's wonderful. (I'm starting to tear up as I write this.)
My sister isn't as smart as I am, we'll both admit it, and she has this chronic illness and she's just had so many things go wrong in her life but when I look at her life I'm in awe. She has this great husband who's so good to her and her husband's family treats her like their own. In fact when I go stay with her, they treat me as part of their family as wel. She has this job she loves working with children as a physical therapist and she's put her illness into remission. She's so strong and wonderful and I'm just so lucky to have a sister like her or just a friend like her. I think sometimes she doesn't know how much I appreciate just a phone call from her or how she sends me cards to say how happy she is for me even for the littlest things.
Anyways the reason I'm writing this is that my sister called the other day and she said she knows how much I'm not really excited about my birthday this year. All this stuff with J is bugging me and I'm so worried about the big test coming up and so much is just going on I feel like the world is spinning too fast. She called and suggested that if I drive home the weekend before my birthday then she'll drive there too (Cleveland is right between where we live) and she and A (her husband) will celebrate my birthday with me. I don't know why but it just hit me with how sweet it was for her to suddenly decide to change her plans and meet me in Cleveland for what seems to be a very no-so-special birthday, after all she's coming in for this big family thing in April right before I go stay with her and then again at the end of May for Memorial Day Weekend.
I think I just feel so bad sometimes that i'm not a better sister to her. I'm pretty forgetful. I always remember her birthday but I've gotten so sidetracked that I haven't bought her Chanukah present yet although I know what I'm getting her. I don't really go out of my way to see her on her birthday. I feel sometimes like I understand why she's everyone's favorite, she really deserves to be. And this wonderful life she has, she so deserves that too.
For those who are still reading, I hope that each of you has someone in your life that touches you, reaches out to you, supports you like my sister does for me. And I would love to hear all about it!
~~~~~~~~~~~~
ETA: And I'm stupid and I realized I just should have added this on last night. But a huge happy birthday to
aggieshan08! You're not actually in town anyways but that doesn't mean I don't remember your birthday girl!