Sep 10, 2000 17:20
everything is so royaly screwed. guys use the term "i love u" an "forever" soo loosly. sum may mean it an others may not.. but there is no way to really tell, u just have to trust them. all good things eventually come to an end, whether it be death or just 2 ppl fallin out of love. for me i hoped it would be death, but now i'm not so sure. when u here about your other having doubts..... well it kinda puts a whole new view on things. like, maybe i'm too young for a serious relationship, or long distance, or whatever. i keep tellin myself that i'm not too young or no distance is too long, but what am i really doing? trying to fool myself? hes like a butterfly, an i must let him go, if he returns, well then i guess he's mine. but if he doesn't.. then i will be crushed.. but i guess it is possible to move on, as much as i don't want to think that way. i feel he is my one.. but is there only 1 person for everyone? an is it fate that they come across each other? or some greater force.. i'm tired of the sadness, loneliness, and downess i go through. i'm so confused right now... hes sending out all these mixed messages, he says hes having dobuts, but then hes like i love u soo much, so i mean which do i listen to? right now i have no clue.. i love him from the depths of my heart, an soul..an i don't even like about thinking of us not together, but what if it does happen? i dunno how i got along without him before.. i definatly don't know how i'd do it now... i just need an answer. some thing to tell me its all gonna be alright... but the one who can tell me that isn't available at the moment. what am i gonna do?