The Secret....
"The Secret"
on the way to grey
i could hardly wait
to see you again
to feel your hands
covering me
til the storm is done
what seemed to be the end
was not the end at all
when i hear the rain
should i be afraid
for my, for my
for my... life
why do you look at me that way?
i told you
that i was too busy to see you
i would never
keep a secret from you
from you
from you
is it over?
i am fine
thank you dearly
for your time
i'll be leaving
don't you cry
i'll be back soon
at least i'll try
can't you see
there is no time to think
selfishly
yesterday's gone
tomorrow's here
can't turn back now
i won't quit
i still love you
i swear
i always will
My mind is stirring..pondering of the past...something that I hate thinking about. Too many distant memories, and people that I still think about. Some that I still care about deeply and can't get over. I miss her still. Why didn't I just move? Why didn't I just ask her to marry me when I had the chance. It was the reason I went down there. I wanted to give her some type of promise...something she could rely on...hold onto until I was there. Why did I hold back what I know I wanted to do, and why can't I get over it now? Did I make mistakes then and am only realising it now, or was it just not meant to be...I'm so shattered...so lost...so broken. This secret has burrowed a place in the depths of my mind. I don't think I can shake it. I wish I knew if it was what was supposed to occur...then I could at least have a chance to move on. But no, I can't have that...
Dad seems to enjoy pissing me off. COnstantly doubting everything I want to do with my life. Does he not see that I'm a very skilled programmer? Does he not have any faith in me what-so-ever? I just need to push them all away..all the non-believing people...just get rid of them all. Shame I couldn't push them into the past...just forget them.
Directory is a success for the time being..it's bringing in a nice amount of hits daily now. At least I proved them all wrong in that area.
*Sigh*...and even though my birthday is approaching, I'm still not happy. I'm not going to get what I want. I miss her terribly...I wish I could have her for my birthday. Someone please give me her for my birthday and I'll hold her safe forever. She's all I want.
on the way to grey
i could hardly wait
to see you again
to feel your hands
covering me
til the storm is done
what seemed to be the end
was not the end at all
when i hear the rain
should i be afraid
for my, for my
for my... life
why do you look at me that way?
i told you
that i was too busy to see you
i would never
keep a secret from you
from you
from you
is it over?
i am fine
thank you dearly
for your time
i'll be leaving
don't you cry
i'll be back soon
at least i'll try
can't you see
there is no time to think
selfishly
yesterday's gone
tomorrow's here
can't turn back now
i won't quit
i still love you
i swear
i always will
My mind is stirring..pondering of the past...something that I hate thinking about. Too many distant memories, and people that I still think about. Some that I still care about deeply and can't get over. I miss her still. Why didn't I just move? Why didn't I just ask her to marry me when I had the chance. It was the reason I went down there. I wanted to give her some type of promise...something she could rely on...hold onto until I was there. Why did I hold back what I know I wanted to do, and why can't I get over it now? Did I make mistakes then and am only realising it now, or was it just not meant to be...I'm so shattered...so lost...so broken. This secret has burrowed a place in the depths of my mind. I don't think I can shake it. I wish I knew if it was what was supposed to occur...then I could at least have a chance to move on. But no, I can't have that...
Dad seems to enjoy pissing me off. COnstantly doubting everything I want to do with my life. Does he not see that I'm a very skilled programmer? Does he not have any faith in me what-so-ever? I just need to push them all away..all the non-believing people...just get rid of them all. Shame I couldn't push them into the past...just forget them.
Directory is a success for the time being..it's bringing in a nice amount of hits daily now. At least I proved them all wrong in that area.
*Sigh*...and even though my birthday is approaching, I'm still not happy. I'm not going to get what I want. I miss her terribly...I wish I could have her for my birthday. Someone please give me her for my birthday and I'll hold her safe forever. She's all I want.