A Tribute to Testosterone
Hollywood and History
Yesterday I received an English silver penny dating back to the reign of Edward I, aka Longshanks and the "Hammer of the Scots". An ambitious warrior-king, he conquered Wales and tried to subjugate Scotland.
Silver penny of Edward I - Newcastle Mint. c. 1295
Naturally, I had to throw on my DVD Braveheart and grok the warfare and sweeping saga of William Wallace. It's a wonderful story and it the brutal ending never fails to yank a few tears from my eyes - but historically it's classical Hollywood crap. But that is typical of most movies these days. Lately I've been on a 'testosterone laden' ancient movie marathon. Over the past three weeks I've seen - Braveheart, Gladiator, 300, Alexander, Troy, Beowulf and Kingdom of Heaven. Both Braveheart and Gladiator scored academy awards - but they are total historical disasters. OTOH, Alexander and Kdm. of Heaven were quite accurate but critical and financial flops.
Rating them on *just* historical 'accuracy':
'300' - overall B+/A- - other than some of the Persian funky weirdness - quite good. Many historical quotes and situations were used. Best part - the tight Spartan Phalanx formation battles.
Troy - A- - a NON-mythical interpretation - when done this way - very good accuracy. The only miscue that stands out is placing coins for the boatman - that came out c. 600 BCE (Troy is set at c. 1200 BCE).
Alexander B+, quite historically accurate - but the story and acting is a friggen mess.
Kingdom of Heaven - B - pretty good for the most part in places, events and characters
Braveheart D- - great story but hardly *any* historical accuracy. Personally, I would flunk a student turning in this crapfest.
Gladiator C- ..Only the beginning and end of the movie sticks to history - otherwise it's mostly crap. However the battle between the Romans and the German barbarians was damned *awesome*.
Beowulf - C+ - a loose adaptation of the Beowulf saga - but it is entertaining.
OK, my f-list - what is the MOST testosterone charged movie ever made (in terms of heroics, gore, battle-lust and grand story)? Give your reasons as to 'why'.
(IMHO - it's '300' followed closely by 'Beowulf'. Gore, great quotes and heroics abound, though 300 is a much more inspiring story.)
Yesterday I received an English silver penny dating back to the reign of Edward I, aka Longshanks and the "Hammer of the Scots". An ambitious warrior-king, he conquered Wales and tried to subjugate Scotland.
Silver penny of Edward I - Newcastle Mint. c. 1295
Naturally, I had to throw on my DVD Braveheart and grok the warfare and sweeping saga of William Wallace. It's a wonderful story and it the brutal ending never fails to yank a few tears from my eyes - but historically it's classical Hollywood crap. But that is typical of most movies these days. Lately I've been on a 'testosterone laden' ancient movie marathon. Over the past three weeks I've seen - Braveheart, Gladiator, 300, Alexander, Troy, Beowulf and Kingdom of Heaven. Both Braveheart and Gladiator scored academy awards - but they are total historical disasters. OTOH, Alexander and Kdm. of Heaven were quite accurate but critical and financial flops.
Rating them on *just* historical 'accuracy':
'300' - overall B+/A- - other than some of the Persian funky weirdness - quite good. Many historical quotes and situations were used. Best part - the tight Spartan Phalanx formation battles.
Troy - A- - a NON-mythical interpretation - when done this way - very good accuracy. The only miscue that stands out is placing coins for the boatman - that came out c. 600 BCE (Troy is set at c. 1200 BCE).
Alexander B+, quite historically accurate - but the story and acting is a friggen mess.
Kingdom of Heaven - B - pretty good for the most part in places, events and characters
Braveheart D- - great story but hardly *any* historical accuracy. Personally, I would flunk a student turning in this crapfest.
Gladiator C- ..Only the beginning and end of the movie sticks to history - otherwise it's mostly crap. However the battle between the Romans and the German barbarians was damned *awesome*.
Beowulf - C+ - a loose adaptation of the Beowulf saga - but it is entertaining.
OK, my f-list - what is the MOST testosterone charged movie ever made (in terms of heroics, gore, battle-lust and grand story)? Give your reasons as to 'why'.
(IMHO - it's '300' followed closely by 'Beowulf'. Gore, great quotes and heroics abound, though 300 is a much more inspiring story.)