till it hurts too much..
i'm sitting in my car in the main parking lot of my college, staring out my window, people watching, waiting for kate so we can grab some lunch. i'm harboring a kind of low-key frustration, mostly with myself. see, i'm sort of remembering what it first felt like to fall in love. it was so sweet and perfect and simple. i still think of him whenever i hear our song. it makes me smile. but since that summer back in highschool, everythings been different and of course it would be. i guess the point is, it's not simple anymore. and that's a shame. i've fallen for him over the simplest things. smiles, gestures, silences, laughter. it's sad when people don't want to be loved or rather, that they can't accept the concept of love because they're too busy trying to forget the last time they loved someone. or maybe it's not sad at all, and i'm just always on one side of the equation, stumbling haphazardly through every single emotion almost always alone, because the truth of it has always been: i am not the girl. just, that girl.
question is, how long will i wait for someone who has absolutely no problem saying point blank, that things will never really change?
yeah, we all know the answer.. till it hurts too much.