Original: The Best Bitch
Title: The Best Bitch
Author: chris4short
prompt_in_a_box: Round #3
Prompt #37: "I keep waiting to meet a man who has more balls than I do." - Salma Hayek
Word Count: 579
Genre: humor(ish)
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: mention of drugs. and almost death.
Fandom: Original
Pairing/Character: Original Character with no name
Summary: How many partners have you gone through?
Timeline: None.
Author's Note: This one was 100% hand written while the store was slow. What better way to use this prompt than with a hard ass cop?
“How many partners have you gone through?”
“I thought this was an interview for K-9 duty.”
“It is, but a reading of your report you have a long list of partners. We want to know why.”
“Then you should have asked that question.” She sat back and traced the lip of the coffee cup. “Chuck was my last partner. He was good, backed me up when I needed; I did the same. The bad thing about him was he never wanted to go in. He’d sooner call back up and perhaps risk the perp hearing us or fleeing.
“Shandi was before that. I don’t mind female partners, but we both felt the ‘boys’ weren’t treating us as equals, so we split up.
“Desmin, Jordan, Paul and Ruben were pleasant enough. But Desmin was a closet alcoholic. Jordan thought she had something to prove to the bosses and thought riding me was hard was a good idea. Paul thought about his family more than a cop should. Ruben, well, he thought Narcotics was a dead end department and transferred to homicide as soon as he could.
“Sara was my first female partner. She was a disgrace to the badge. She slept her way o the top, and she let everyone know about it.
“Felix was my first partner. He was kind and passionate. He could make anyone feel at ease with his boyish looks and his blue eyes. Rumor had it we were more than just partners. Sadly, not rue.”
“You liked working with Felix?”
“Yes and no. He was flirtatious, sometimes crossing the line. He really knew how to charm the ladies, but when I worked my first case, on my own, he almost let me drown - literally.”
“How come?”
“Well the case was a missing person’s case. It seemed like a case of kidnapping even. Anyway, she was spotted on a boat in the middle of the river, so we joined the boat rescue and with the choppy waters, the boat rocked, and I fell over board. I was on the opposite side of the boat as everyone else, so no, no one noticed. But I did yell for Felix to stop the boat, and he heard me, and waited for a moment longer than I liked - I mean he looked at the missing lady and back at me, almost like he debated before he told the crew I went over.”
“I see.” The clipboard made a small slap as it was put down. The interviewer leaned forward. “Why do you think you have been through so many partners, particularly male partners?”
“I think they don’t know how to handle a woman like me. They see a skinny, 5’ 5”, curves in the right places, sassy Irish-American. They don’t treat me as an equal. Some have treated me like I was a K-9, already. I’m not a bitch, I just have bigger balls than they do.”
Slowly a smile spread across the interviewers face. “I think you can handle the top notch dog we have just received. She is really good with commands but she is vicious with the criminals. She ran down a perp trying to escape from custody and was found crying asking for the dog to stop growling.”
“Sounds like a nice dog.”
He smiled. “Her bark and growl are mean, breaks men down in minutes. We call her Princess.”
A large smile broke on her face. “I think she will be perfect.”
Author: chris4short
prompt_in_a_box: Round #3
Prompt #37: "I keep waiting to meet a man who has more balls than I do." - Salma Hayek
Word Count: 579
Genre: humor(ish)
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: mention of drugs. and almost death.
Fandom: Original
Pairing/Character: Original Character with no name
Summary: How many partners have you gone through?
Timeline: None.
Author's Note: This one was 100% hand written while the store was slow. What better way to use this prompt than with a hard ass cop?
“How many partners have you gone through?”
“I thought this was an interview for K-9 duty.”
“It is, but a reading of your report you have a long list of partners. We want to know why.”
“Then you should have asked that question.” She sat back and traced the lip of the coffee cup. “Chuck was my last partner. He was good, backed me up when I needed; I did the same. The bad thing about him was he never wanted to go in. He’d sooner call back up and perhaps risk the perp hearing us or fleeing.
“Shandi was before that. I don’t mind female partners, but we both felt the ‘boys’ weren’t treating us as equals, so we split up.
“Desmin, Jordan, Paul and Ruben were pleasant enough. But Desmin was a closet alcoholic. Jordan thought she had something to prove to the bosses and thought riding me was hard was a good idea. Paul thought about his family more than a cop should. Ruben, well, he thought Narcotics was a dead end department and transferred to homicide as soon as he could.
“Sara was my first female partner. She was a disgrace to the badge. She slept her way o the top, and she let everyone know about it.
“Felix was my first partner. He was kind and passionate. He could make anyone feel at ease with his boyish looks and his blue eyes. Rumor had it we were more than just partners. Sadly, not rue.”
“You liked working with Felix?”
“Yes and no. He was flirtatious, sometimes crossing the line. He really knew how to charm the ladies, but when I worked my first case, on my own, he almost let me drown - literally.”
“How come?”
“Well the case was a missing person’s case. It seemed like a case of kidnapping even. Anyway, she was spotted on a boat in the middle of the river, so we joined the boat rescue and with the choppy waters, the boat rocked, and I fell over board. I was on the opposite side of the boat as everyone else, so no, no one noticed. But I did yell for Felix to stop the boat, and he heard me, and waited for a moment longer than I liked - I mean he looked at the missing lady and back at me, almost like he debated before he told the crew I went over.”
“I see.” The clipboard made a small slap as it was put down. The interviewer leaned forward. “Why do you think you have been through so many partners, particularly male partners?”
“I think they don’t know how to handle a woman like me. They see a skinny, 5’ 5”, curves in the right places, sassy Irish-American. They don’t treat me as an equal. Some have treated me like I was a K-9, already. I’m not a bitch, I just have bigger balls than they do.”
Slowly a smile spread across the interviewers face. “I think you can handle the top notch dog we have just received. She is really good with commands but she is vicious with the criminals. She ran down a perp trying to escape from custody and was found crying asking for the dog to stop growling.”
“Sounds like a nice dog.”
He smiled. “Her bark and growl are mean, breaks men down in minutes. We call her Princess.”
A large smile broke on her face. “I think she will be perfect.”