something has been lost

[doodlbug]

we are reasons so unreal
we can't help but feel that something has been lost
but please you know you're just like me
next time I promise we'll be
perfect
...
memories unwind so far I still know who you are
but now I wonder who I was
angel, you know it's not the end
we'll always be good friends
the letters have been sent on
so please, you always were so free
you'll see, I promise we'll be perfect
perfect strangers when we meet
~*Perfect* Smashing Pumpkins

I was listening to this song today, and I think it's about reincarnation. One year ago exactly, my childhood best friend died in a car accident. I'm still dealing. I don't think I will ever get over it. I think about her every day and miss her. I wish I would have spent more time with her.
I think I believe in reincarnation, or something like it. That energy inside you has to go somewhere. The idea of heaven, at least in the traditional sense, sounds almost boring to me. Getting what you want all the time? Forever? And if when you die, that's the end, well, kind of grim way to think.
I just can't believe it. There's too many unanswered questions. There's got to be something else.