(no subject)
i'm never falling in love again. no more heart breaks. i'm gonna be so careful; i will not like the guy so much.
because my heart fucking hurts. and i've only felt this one other time in my life. but now i know why it's called a heartache, a heartbreak. because when your heart tightens and you're asphyxiated for a brief two seconds, and you can't fucking breathe, that's your heart breaking right there.
and you can't make the person love you back. can't make him miss you the way you miss him. want to see and stay with you as much as you do. and after you've given him everything, your trust, your heart, your hand, it's worse when he tries to accept them, tries not to make your heart so mangled and twisted and maybe give you back some semblance of dignity after a few pathetic attempts at... doing something you have no idea what you're doing.
and thinking about it after waking up at 5 in the morning. i don't want to be lovesick. i hate you. i really do.
'cause i knew this would happen. and i told you it would happen. so when you asked me out, i couldn't say yes immediately. i told you to get to know me more and maybe you'd realize it's just better as friends. not after all this. i'm not fucking designed for this. and i knew that after my first heartbreak.
ah i don't even know what i'm typing. most people probably write epic stuff, but i can't do it. this venting didn't help me as much as i thought it would.
if you're suffering like i am, know you're not alone.
because my heart fucking hurts. and i've only felt this one other time in my life. but now i know why it's called a heartache, a heartbreak. because when your heart tightens and you're asphyxiated for a brief two seconds, and you can't fucking breathe, that's your heart breaking right there.
and you can't make the person love you back. can't make him miss you the way you miss him. want to see and stay with you as much as you do. and after you've given him everything, your trust, your heart, your hand, it's worse when he tries to accept them, tries not to make your heart so mangled and twisted and maybe give you back some semblance of dignity after a few pathetic attempts at... doing something you have no idea what you're doing.
and thinking about it after waking up at 5 in the morning. i don't want to be lovesick. i hate you. i really do.
'cause i knew this would happen. and i told you it would happen. so when you asked me out, i couldn't say yes immediately. i told you to get to know me more and maybe you'd realize it's just better as friends. not after all this. i'm not fucking designed for this. and i knew that after my first heartbreak.
ah i don't even know what i'm typing. most people probably write epic stuff, but i can't do it. this venting didn't help me as much as i thought it would.
if you're suffering like i am, know you're not alone.