(no subject)
For the past week or so I have had this feeling in the pit of my stomach. I am unsure of what exactly it could be. Let me rephrase that, I believe I know what it is but at the same time I have my doubts. Have you ever had a feeling that "on stage" things were fine but "behind the scenes" something completly different was going on? I surmise it is something along those lines. Like reliving the dream that you do not even want to dream let alone live. Life is a game and that is all this is, a game. A game in my head that has played a role in everyday, every relationship, every friendship, everything I have ever done. Its not fun and it is hard to ignore. All i wish for is for the one person I am talking about to show me some type of a sign. Anything, but to make it visable for myself. I definitly wish I had someone to talk to about this stuff without them getting irritated with me. Oh well, I either get the sign or don't. I hope I do but if I don't...well there is not anything I can do about it I suppose.