I can't cook pancakes..
I haven't wrote in awhile. I dont think I know how to anymore. I find myself talking more than writing.Is that how I express myself nowadays? I guess its not a bad thing, but if I try to write anything of substance anymore my mind just draws a blank..Like if someone were to tell me write a poem write now, I wouldnt be able to and i havent felt the urge to write any in the past two months either..whats happening to me? I guess my overactive imagination of 20 years has stretched beyond elasticity and snapped back into shape. I most certainly hope not. Im feelng very uncreative. I have no idea what the point of this entry is I just want to say a least one important thing and exit the building
I am cold, and hungry, im broke and i have no food that seems appetizing in this room.
Ahhh anyway. I'm updating because Miss Megan Collins told me to and I must do what she says.
Hate! Hate! Hate! Hate!
I am not a hateful person, I am no longer even an extremely pessismistic person, although some would like to believe me to be so, but to me its easier to dislike someone that to like them. I always always at first try to like people and see the good in them because i think im easy to get along with, but i will only go so long before i Like I said previously its so much easier to not put effort into establishing anything with another person. How lovely. Whatever, no big thing. I find myself taking things less seriously now and not really getting as overwhelmed as I would in the past. I dont know if thats good or bad. Its good if i'm relaxing from being such a spaz, but bad if im becoming so numb from past experiences i dont care about anything, but i dont think its that.
Songs I've been listening to alot
1. bittersweet-kanye west and john mayer- this song never officially came out because all i can find is a very poor quality version of it, but it includes two of my favorite artists and i feel like what the song is saying i can relate to
2. kryptonite-big boi feat purple ribbon allstars. need i say more. its a song full of energy and its just hot...
3. Stand up for love-destiny's child- This song is beautiful. all three of them sound great vocally on this song and i've been playing it alot since i first got it
4. ohh and the entire alicia keys unplugged album!
I've been getting alot more chances to do tarot readings for other people. Its interesting how you think "some" people would be weird about that sort of thing, but yet they are really open minded about it. Of course very few are into it as much as I am, but i had done readings for people for about 5 years or so. I do them for myself, but i'd like to meet someone or go to a tarot card reader because i've never had mine read at all. The only other person i know into it doesnt feel comfortable enough yet to do a reading for someone else. So i'm just assed out until then. Its like a chain reaction though, once some person wants their cards read, then whoever is with them does too. which i have no problem with at all. But I really need to get more comfortable with using my new deck because i'm getting this feeling its time for me to not use the old deck as much. And i want to memorize more spreads there is no reason why i have done this for this long and not no more off the top of my head than 3..
Im going to go now..i need some saul williams in my life
Thankyou for being such an annoying jerk, which has made me unable to like to you anymore. Thankyou, being who you are now has lifted the weight off my shoulders and now i am free to actually be free now and run and not worry that i owe you a damn thing. awesome.
Oh and as you can probably see the title of the entry had nothing to do with anything i wrote about. i know im random like that.