::fucking hell::
Dear Journal,
I can not keep my life up and running for even a fucking min.
This weekend was going well. Except paul and I got in a fight because i didn't come over as early as he thought i was while i was with my mom. because he doesn't like my mom and didn't know what me and her were doing. We were packing up things i would need for my apartment. she was giving me appliances and pots and pans and things i would just really need. So I ended up not getting to do what I wanted to do and surprise paul with the apartment =[
monday night once I had gotten here and we started fighting, I called my dad again trying to get intouch with him. finally someone answered. It was mrs.lisa telling me that they were getting a divorce and he wasn't there. I started bawling. for the second time in my life my family has split and this tme I don't know what my dad is going to do. he has nothing. i'm worried shitless about him. and don't really know what to do. I can't really help since I have my own business to atend to. I can't help him get on his feet. and I just really don't know what to do. And besides being super worried about my dad and his well being I now don't have car insurance. So I will be needing to get that. and if anything happens with my dad and depts my car is the only thing in his name. they would take it. and i need my car. so i need to have it switched into my name. and i will have to pay insurance plus my rent which shouldnt be too big of a problem. but it will make it harder to save up my money.
and the worst part is i can't get in touch withmy dad. he hasn't tried to call me at all. and he probaly wont he's too scaredd. he's got too much damned pride. i'm so fucking worried he's going to do somthing stupid. so very fucking worried.
Paul when he saw i was crying on the phone tried his best to comfort me. it worked for the most part at that moment. he got my mind off things by going swimming. and just keeping me busy for a while.
i've got to go to school now. and i hope i will be able to talk to my dad soon.
i really don't know whats going on.
Jessie.
I can not keep my life up and running for even a fucking min.
This weekend was going well. Except paul and I got in a fight because i didn't come over as early as he thought i was while i was with my mom. because he doesn't like my mom and didn't know what me and her were doing. We were packing up things i would need for my apartment. she was giving me appliances and pots and pans and things i would just really need. So I ended up not getting to do what I wanted to do and surprise paul with the apartment =[
monday night once I had gotten here and we started fighting, I called my dad again trying to get intouch with him. finally someone answered. It was mrs.lisa telling me that they were getting a divorce and he wasn't there. I started bawling. for the second time in my life my family has split and this tme I don't know what my dad is going to do. he has nothing. i'm worried shitless about him. and don't really know what to do. I can't really help since I have my own business to atend to. I can't help him get on his feet. and I just really don't know what to do. And besides being super worried about my dad and his well being I now don't have car insurance. So I will be needing to get that. and if anything happens with my dad and depts my car is the only thing in his name. they would take it. and i need my car. so i need to have it switched into my name. and i will have to pay insurance plus my rent which shouldnt be too big of a problem. but it will make it harder to save up my money.
and the worst part is i can't get in touch withmy dad. he hasn't tried to call me at all. and he probaly wont he's too scaredd. he's got too much damned pride. i'm so fucking worried he's going to do somthing stupid. so very fucking worried.
Paul when he saw i was crying on the phone tried his best to comfort me. it worked for the most part at that moment. he got my mind off things by going swimming. and just keeping me busy for a while.
i've got to go to school now. and i hope i will be able to talk to my dad soon.
i really don't know whats going on.
Jessie.