Heaven (PG-13)
so i wrote this a while ago. it has no real point, and wasnt really going anywhere. then somehow it got thrown into this other story thing i'm writing with my friend alisha, and all of a sudden it had a purpose. i'm not going to post the other thing here, or at least not yet. maybe some other time. we'll see.
Title: Heaven
Author: geminispaz65
Length: 907 words.
Pairing: Jackie/Christopher
Rating PG-13 for language.
“What would you say if I told you I loved you?” he asked. I was writing, trying to keep busy while he worked on my door. What is it with him and asking questions when I’m doing my best work?
I looked up at him, shook my head a little, and just went back to writing. “Just fix my door, please. That’s why I called you over here; not for long, philosophical discussions about love and marriage.” I told him, hoping the idea I’d been forming hadn't flitted too far away into the recesses of my jumbled mind.
“No, I’m serious. What would you say?” he asked again, a weird tone to his voice.
I looked up again to find him staring at me. I sighed and could only stare back for a few seconds. I guess thi was oing to be a long discussion. One I was not at all looking forward to.
“I…I’d say it back. You know that.” I answered quietly. He wouldn’t be asking if he didn’t know.
“No, actually I didn’t know that. Last I heard on the subject, you didn’t want me being all ‘boyfriend-ish.’” He said. He was still holding the door, and I could see his knuckles turning white with the way he was gripping the edges. I was a little surprised at the level of anger, at such an early stage in the conversation.
“Well, I didn't. But it was different then. I’d just started college and so much had changed. It was…” I trailed off and sighed again. I didn't want to bring up all the shit that had happened those first few months. “It was different.”
“Different how?” he asked impatiently, pushing the issue. He asked for it.
“What do you mean, ‘different how’? You showed up out of nowhere, engaged!” I twisted the pen I’d been flipping through my fingers a little, needing something to do with my hands. “The entire first week of school, I didn’t eat a single thing, did you know that? Nothing. You really didn’t help, popping in with the ne fiancé.” I snapped.
“And now? After two and a half years now ou love me?” He’d propped the door up against my house, had turned around and was glaring at me. He was really angry now, and I never knew how to talk to him when he got like this.
“It’s not like I didn’t love you before, I just…I don’t think I realized it.” I answered, my anger disappearing. He had a bit of a point with that last bit.
“Oh, and now you’ve realized it?” he asked spitefully. “You’ve had your epiphany and now yo do ove me?”
“Christopher, it’s not like that.” I tried to calm him down, to stop the flood of accusations that I could feel coming, but nothing was working.
“Then what’s it like, Jacks? Tell me. I’ dying o know.” The sarcasm was coming off of him in waves.
“I don’t know, Christopher! I just…I don’t know.” I jumped up, as agitated as he was now. I walked away from him, dropping the notebook and pen on the bench. I turned away, wrapping my arms around myself and staring off ahead of me.
I took a few seconds to collect my thoughts before turning back to him and continuing, calmer and quieter. “Ok. I’ll say it. I love you. I want to be with you. But I’m not looking for everything. I’m no ready or everything. So if that’s what you’re shooting for with this engagement, then you should probably just stay with the chick. If marriage, the white picket fence, and the 2.5 kids is what you want, then I’ not he one you want.” I looked away for a second, and then immediately looked back. “But if…if there’s still something here between us, then I’d like to try again. It’s up to you.” I said finally, shrugging a little.
He let out a short laugh, slumping back against the house. “God, I hate it when you say that.” he said, scrubbing his hands over is face. He came over to the bench and sat down. He entwined his fingers and propped his elbows on his knees, leaning his chin on his knuckles.
He sighed. It was going around. “What if I actually loved her?” he asked quietly, watching me out of the corner of his eye.
“Then we wouldn’t be having this conversation.” I answered tiredly, sitting back down next to him.
“You know what I want. You know how much I want to be with you.” He told me, sounding almost desperate. He sat up straight and turned to face me.
“Then what’s stopping you?” I asked him quietly, a smirk playing on my lips. He slid over on the bench, effectively closing the space between us.
“Nothing.” And with that we were kissing, passionately and roughly, just like we used to back when we were teenagers, when we never let life intrude on our private little heaven.
For the first time in a long time, life wasn’t as suffocating as it had seemed these last few years.
~*~
That night was our first time together. The second time was two days later, after he’d broken it off with her. The third time was minutes after we’d finished moving him in with me.
Nine months later Sebastian was moving in too. And a month after that, Christopher moved back out.
Title: Heaven
Author: geminispaz65
Length: 907 words.
Pairing: Jackie/Christopher
Rating PG-13 for language.
“What would you say if I told you I loved you?” he asked. I was writing, trying to keep busy while he worked on my door. What is it with him and asking questions when I’m doing my best work?
I looked up at him, shook my head a little, and just went back to writing. “Just fix my door, please. That’s why I called you over here; not for long, philosophical discussions about love and marriage.” I told him, hoping the idea I’d been forming hadn't flitted too far away into the recesses of my jumbled mind.
“No, I’m serious. What would you say?” he asked again, a weird tone to his voice.
I looked up again to find him staring at me. I sighed and could only stare back for a few seconds. I guess thi was oing to be a long discussion. One I was not at all looking forward to.
“I…I’d say it back. You know that.” I answered quietly. He wouldn’t be asking if he didn’t know.
“No, actually I didn’t know that. Last I heard on the subject, you didn’t want me being all ‘boyfriend-ish.’” He said. He was still holding the door, and I could see his knuckles turning white with the way he was gripping the edges. I was a little surprised at the level of anger, at such an early stage in the conversation.
“Well, I didn't. But it was different then. I’d just started college and so much had changed. It was…” I trailed off and sighed again. I didn't want to bring up all the shit that had happened those first few months. “It was different.”
“Different how?” he asked impatiently, pushing the issue. He asked for it.
“What do you mean, ‘different how’? You showed up out of nowhere, engaged!” I twisted the pen I’d been flipping through my fingers a little, needing something to do with my hands. “The entire first week of school, I didn’t eat a single thing, did you know that? Nothing. You really didn’t help, popping in with the ne fiancé.” I snapped.
“And now? After two and a half years now ou love me?” He’d propped the door up against my house, had turned around and was glaring at me. He was really angry now, and I never knew how to talk to him when he got like this.
“It’s not like I didn’t love you before, I just…I don’t think I realized it.” I answered, my anger disappearing. He had a bit of a point with that last bit.
“Oh, and now you’ve realized it?” he asked spitefully. “You’ve had your epiphany and now yo do ove me?”
“Christopher, it’s not like that.” I tried to calm him down, to stop the flood of accusations that I could feel coming, but nothing was working.
“Then what’s it like, Jacks? Tell me. I’ dying o know.” The sarcasm was coming off of him in waves.
“I don’t know, Christopher! I just…I don’t know.” I jumped up, as agitated as he was now. I walked away from him, dropping the notebook and pen on the bench. I turned away, wrapping my arms around myself and staring off ahead of me.
I took a few seconds to collect my thoughts before turning back to him and continuing, calmer and quieter. “Ok. I’ll say it. I love you. I want to be with you. But I’m not looking for everything. I’m no ready or everything. So if that’s what you’re shooting for with this engagement, then you should probably just stay with the chick. If marriage, the white picket fence, and the 2.5 kids is what you want, then I’ not he one you want.” I looked away for a second, and then immediately looked back. “But if…if there’s still something here between us, then I’d like to try again. It’s up to you.” I said finally, shrugging a little.
He let out a short laugh, slumping back against the house. “God, I hate it when you say that.” he said, scrubbing his hands over is face. He came over to the bench and sat down. He entwined his fingers and propped his elbows on his knees, leaning his chin on his knuckles.
He sighed. It was going around. “What if I actually loved her?” he asked quietly, watching me out of the corner of his eye.
“Then we wouldn’t be having this conversation.” I answered tiredly, sitting back down next to him.
“You know what I want. You know how much I want to be with you.” He told me, sounding almost desperate. He sat up straight and turned to face me.
“Then what’s stopping you?” I asked him quietly, a smirk playing on my lips. He slid over on the bench, effectively closing the space between us.
“Nothing.” And with that we were kissing, passionately and roughly, just like we used to back when we were teenagers, when we never let life intrude on our private little heaven.
For the first time in a long time, life wasn’t as suffocating as it had seemed these last few years.
~*~
That night was our first time together. The second time was two days later, after he’d broken it off with her. The third time was minutes after we’d finished moving him in with me.
Nine months later Sebastian was moving in too. And a month after that, Christopher moved back out.