debutante
Last night, despite a raging cough, I went to my cousin's debut. It was held just a subdivision away from ours anyway plus..it was J. I couldn't say no to J, despite the late notice that I was part of the entourage.
I was just supposed to wing it that night. I really didn't feel like preparing a speech because I feared sounding much much older than her college friends who were also speaking. But an hour before the program started (I was early), I realized I can't stand up there with nothing prepared. There were things J needed to hear and it was my chance to say it. So I began typing furiously on my cellphone.
Because we were arranged to speak by age, I was one of the first up. And I did sound much more older than everyone else who followed me. I did not have the cellphone quotes everyone else had, none of the funny jokes nor anecdotes, I had none of the pop references, at least none that weren't 90s. My message was a tad too serious, a tad too verbose, a tad too preachy, a tad too mid-20s. The experience was jarring. It made me feel a bit sad. I wasn't young anymore. I was no longer a teenager.
It's a hard pill to swallow but it's one I more willingly down this morning. It's a fact, I am no longer 18. It's been 6 years since. It's sad I sound older but I guess it would be even sadder if I sounded the same. Even just a little, it's a relief to know I've grown up.
My parents would be glad to know my own debut has served some purpose.
I was just supposed to wing it that night. I really didn't feel like preparing a speech because I feared sounding much much older than her college friends who were also speaking. But an hour before the program started (I was early), I realized I can't stand up there with nothing prepared. There were things J needed to hear and it was my chance to say it. So I began typing furiously on my cellphone.
Because we were arranged to speak by age, I was one of the first up. And I did sound much more older than everyone else who followed me. I did not have the cellphone quotes everyone else had, none of the funny jokes nor anecdotes, I had none of the pop references, at least none that weren't 90s. My message was a tad too serious, a tad too verbose, a tad too preachy, a tad too mid-20s. The experience was jarring. It made me feel a bit sad. I wasn't young anymore. I was no longer a teenager.
It's a hard pill to swallow but it's one I more willingly down this morning. It's a fact, I am no longer 18. It's been 6 years since. It's sad I sound older but I guess it would be even sadder if I sounded the same. Even just a little, it's a relief to know I've grown up.
My parents would be glad to know my own debut has served some purpose.