(no subject)

[dodgermask]

It's been awhile, I can't really say that I havn't wanted to update, just that the circumstances wern't right for me to do so. Alot has changed since what I last had to say. It's funny how I swear that everything in my life revolves around relationships, but it seems to be those are the things I manage to fuck up most. I think that perhaps sometimes I'm just too aware of the minor changes, I notice changes in speach patern, I notice when someones using a different vocabularly then they usually do, I notice the people I spend time with, because it's important to me. There seems to be alot of people leaving my life right now, not in any real tangible way and maybe it's just that I'm not glued to the computer anymore, but I miss justine and marcus and sophia. I want to be out there, I want to spend time with random new people however, once I meet someone new, I have this vicious tendancy to notis things about them then get weireded out and appologize once somethings changes like it's my fault. I don't even know how to meet new people any more. I've lost all touch with how to go out and be a person because I was too afraid too dependent on other things and the people already in my life. Then again though real life relationships get strained, there are weird angles you could never guess would come up, there's drama, and other times you don't see eye to eye. I think however I need to re-evaulate my standards 've ditched people for not being perfect...I'm not entirely sure that's the person i want to be.

so anyways this is more for personal use but here's what has been going on in life. I got a flat on the east side, nice quiet area nice upstairs neighbors, i'm really excited for it, got a new job i'm workinng ten hour days painting houses, I ached all weekend but hte works satisfying and what i was looking for we move in august 1st, went to canada enjoyed.