it took me awhile to find a scissor

Jul 29, 2016 17:43

When you start valuing yourself you start to cut ties. Sometimes it's easier to let go of something than to hold onto it. It is the effort that we put into something that we will hate letting go of. I hate wasting my time and efforts. That is why it took me so long to let go. I was trying to salvage something. I was looking for reasons to hang on. When I first started to love, it was innocent and pure, beautiful inside and out. There are things in life that I can not control. For a control freak like me, I will never admit I failed. Bad things happen to good people. That happens often. We accept that love we think we deserve. It's very true. I have to let go, I already have let go. I actually pushed. That beauty does not exist anymore. That spark is gone. What once was, is now tainted, ruined. It holds no characteristics of it's former self. Good bye purity. I will find you in someone else now. I will replace you with people who do have time for me. I will find people who care deeply for me and don't lie to me. People that respect me. Most of all, I will love myself more than I loved you. Can that be my ultimate revenge on you for making me take a step backward? Why would I hang onto someone who tossed me out like garbage? Am I an idiot? Do I like keeping my head just above water? I will not think about you anymore. I will toss you out like you did me. You are now my disposable object. A reject. A removable character that isn't important enough to interact with. Now it's time to grow up a little more. It was nice knowing you, observing you, killing time with you. Goodbye unloving friend. Goodbye foe of mercy. Goodbye to my former self.
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