Clairty
I've been thinking about some things i've started so i'm going to try to get some clairty out right here and now:
1. Smokeing
I started smoking with Ricky a while back and I was smokeing Reds and Menthols ONLY for a while. But i stoped for a good month or so. After Japan i got back and i resisted, but soon i fell right back in after i went to a club and i smoked there and after that i was doing mostly Hookas cuz they roxor my boxors. but then i stoped again(i'm not addict). Though soon i went with a friend to a place and there this girl i met was smoking Eclipses and we smoked together, shes fucking bad ass by the way, after that i bought a pack of those but i never really smoked them. So i stoped again. Then yesterday everything got hectic and i was like "wtf..." so i smoked one while everyone was getting ready to come over and i felt a bit more Clear(?). I don't know, but ever since i was young i grew up with the idea that i was pretending to be against Smoking and Drinking. and Now i realize that i was just trying to lie to myself. I don't hate either of them, i just believe in moderation. Smoking once a day isn't BAD but i don't wanna smoke more then that. I hate it and like it.
2. Back into my gaming Geek world.
When i was hanging out with my budy ricky i sort of left the "geek" game world for a bit and entered into a world of Violence and Drugs and well Sex also. I stayed for a bit but i realized "this isn't for me" and quickly bailed out of that. leaving with a Thing for Drinking and Smoking. Soon i entered back into my realm of play where games roxor my boxors, 1337 talk isn't looked down upon but more of a fun thing. Where i can be who i want to be, and be the better looking of the group.
3. Fashion
I have always been a metro sexual. It was obvious with the fact i cared so much about my apperance and its almost sad. I care how my hair is cut and done and infact i am very picky on the whole thing. I don't wanna go out sometimes if i look like shit but that usualy when i boot up my whole "fuck the world" mode and go Grunge style, which in itself is Fashion. You can say all the shit you want "oh fashion is so fucking shallow" what the fuck is wrong with you? Shallow is hating someone because of something stupid or finding yourself obove others. Or Loving, fucking, and dumping. Shit like that. Shallow isn't caring about how you look, its ONLY caring about how you look. Looking nice isn't a crime.
4. Freedom
People hear me talk now adays and probalby wonder "why the FUCK is he talking so fuckign openly". Seriously i'll talk about my porn with anyone i don't fucking care. Shit i'll even talk to you about if i had something weird growing on my ass. Its me! Its a freedom that many people can't overcome and others shy away from it.
5. Family
Ever since i moved out i've realized how much i love my family and how much i really wanna get close to them. Lately i've become more close to my family then i ever have been my whole life. With the exception of a certain someone (my sister Kimmy). Only becuase shes a hard one to get ahold of -=P. Family is just as important as Friends.
6. Friendships
I've learned the importance of friendship with my last trial of heartbrake and hand grenades. I love you guys, all of you. I'm sorry if i don't hang out with some of you, and if it seems like i'm avoiding you i'm sorry, i might be. Hell i won't lie. But you guys are all cool in your own right and thats what i love about all of you. If you ever need me i'll be there. And if i can't i'm sorry, but i have a life i have to handle also.
7. Drinking
This has been covered in some of my things. No i'm not drinking alot. I just think its fun to get drunk or a bit tipsy and do crazy shit sometimes. Whats wrong with that? i don't believe that you should ever drive drunk nor should you ever take advantage of someone who has been drinking. I don't believe in fighting at all so don't even try to get me to fight. I just sit there and giggle as i drink.
To sum it all up life is just a big giant Marry-go-round. You can't avoid your roots and you can't avoid the past. You can't pretend it never happend and you can't hide from it in a bottle or in a cig. You just have to live up and face the facts of life. Life is beautiful, and so are you.
To all of you who have known me for a while, and to those of you who have just met me, and to those of you who are just out there reading this for the hell of it cuz you found me somehow. Know that no matter what, Tomorrow is Tomorrow. Today is Today. And if you live a lie you die and fade away.
Being good is all that matters. Don't break hearts if you don't have to, Try to treat the world as you think it wants to be treated. Most of all, Accept that which you cannot change, And change that which you can. And hav the wisdom to know the difference(and when to change!). I'm going to go out now and probably chill with some friends at the Anime thing and then probably hike it over to either Nicoles or to Quakecon. Life a beautiful mystery and i love it.
You can blame me for the pain. But i will not be your Sacrfice. You know who you are. Don't act like i was the cause of it. I was just 50%.
Luv you all very much.
I love you my marries.
I love you my friends.
I love you my family.
So today DJPh3x is over and i will be creating a new livejournal. One that will reflect better who i am and not who i thought i was.
<3 Mark, Yes thats my real name to those of you who didn't know it ^^;
1. Smokeing
I started smoking with Ricky a while back and I was smokeing Reds and Menthols ONLY for a while. But i stoped for a good month or so. After Japan i got back and i resisted, but soon i fell right back in after i went to a club and i smoked there and after that i was doing mostly Hookas cuz they roxor my boxors. but then i stoped again(i'm not addict). Though soon i went with a friend to a place and there this girl i met was smoking Eclipses and we smoked together, shes fucking bad ass by the way, after that i bought a pack of those but i never really smoked them. So i stoped again. Then yesterday everything got hectic and i was like "wtf..." so i smoked one while everyone was getting ready to come over and i felt a bit more Clear(?). I don't know, but ever since i was young i grew up with the idea that i was pretending to be against Smoking and Drinking. and Now i realize that i was just trying to lie to myself. I don't hate either of them, i just believe in moderation. Smoking once a day isn't BAD but i don't wanna smoke more then that. I hate it and like it.
2. Back into my gaming Geek world.
When i was hanging out with my budy ricky i sort of left the "geek" game world for a bit and entered into a world of Violence and Drugs and well Sex also. I stayed for a bit but i realized "this isn't for me" and quickly bailed out of that. leaving with a Thing for Drinking and Smoking. Soon i entered back into my realm of play where games roxor my boxors, 1337 talk isn't looked down upon but more of a fun thing. Where i can be who i want to be, and be the better looking of the group.
3. Fashion
I have always been a metro sexual. It was obvious with the fact i cared so much about my apperance and its almost sad. I care how my hair is cut and done and infact i am very picky on the whole thing. I don't wanna go out sometimes if i look like shit but that usualy when i boot up my whole "fuck the world" mode and go Grunge style, which in itself is Fashion. You can say all the shit you want "oh fashion is so fucking shallow" what the fuck is wrong with you? Shallow is hating someone because of something stupid or finding yourself obove others. Or Loving, fucking, and dumping. Shit like that. Shallow isn't caring about how you look, its ONLY caring about how you look. Looking nice isn't a crime.
4. Freedom
People hear me talk now adays and probalby wonder "why the FUCK is he talking so fuckign openly". Seriously i'll talk about my porn with anyone i don't fucking care. Shit i'll even talk to you about if i had something weird growing on my ass. Its me! Its a freedom that many people can't overcome and others shy away from it.
5. Family
Ever since i moved out i've realized how much i love my family and how much i really wanna get close to them. Lately i've become more close to my family then i ever have been my whole life. With the exception of a certain someone (my sister Kimmy). Only becuase shes a hard one to get ahold of -=P. Family is just as important as Friends.
6. Friendships
I've learned the importance of friendship with my last trial of heartbrake and hand grenades. I love you guys, all of you. I'm sorry if i don't hang out with some of you, and if it seems like i'm avoiding you i'm sorry, i might be. Hell i won't lie. But you guys are all cool in your own right and thats what i love about all of you. If you ever need me i'll be there. And if i can't i'm sorry, but i have a life i have to handle also.
7. Drinking
This has been covered in some of my things. No i'm not drinking alot. I just think its fun to get drunk or a bit tipsy and do crazy shit sometimes. Whats wrong with that? i don't believe that you should ever drive drunk nor should you ever take advantage of someone who has been drinking. I don't believe in fighting at all so don't even try to get me to fight. I just sit there and giggle as i drink.
To sum it all up life is just a big giant Marry-go-round. You can't avoid your roots and you can't avoid the past. You can't pretend it never happend and you can't hide from it in a bottle or in a cig. You just have to live up and face the facts of life. Life is beautiful, and so are you.
To all of you who have known me for a while, and to those of you who have just met me, and to those of you who are just out there reading this for the hell of it cuz you found me somehow. Know that no matter what, Tomorrow is Tomorrow. Today is Today. And if you live a lie you die and fade away.
Being good is all that matters. Don't break hearts if you don't have to, Try to treat the world as you think it wants to be treated. Most of all, Accept that which you cannot change, And change that which you can. And hav the wisdom to know the difference(and when to change!). I'm going to go out now and probably chill with some friends at the Anime thing and then probably hike it over to either Nicoles or to Quakecon. Life a beautiful mystery and i love it.
You can blame me for the pain. But i will not be your Sacrfice. You know who you are. Don't act like i was the cause of it. I was just 50%.
Luv you all very much.
I love you my marries.
I love you my friends.
I love you my family.
So today DJPh3x is over and i will be creating a new livejournal. One that will reflect better who i am and not who i thought i was.
<3 Mark, Yes thats my real name to those of you who didn't know it ^^;