the holidays and wishes for 2011
This last year was such a trying year for me but I think I grew a lot as well. I put myself in situations where I felt uncomfortable, did things I didn't think I could do and started carving out a life for myself here in Madrid.
There was also a lot of stagnation as well. I got drunk last New Years Eve and fell on some hard tile floor and messed up my knee, and it hurt really really freaking bad for months, and then after that whenever I put pressure on it, so I used that as an excuse not to do yoga for such a long time. I went to class during August and then quit again due to financial stress. I haven't done any other type of physical activity, other than occasionally walking the dogs, as Dan takes on most of that responsibility. A responsibility that should be a joy and a blessing.
The only cure for stagnancy is action and really learning this lesson is so incredibly painful because my innate tendency is toward inaction, laziness and stagnation. Maybe I need to be more accepting of this?
My Christmas was nice. I loved seeing my parents, even though it pains me to see them age. As fucked up as she may have been when I was growing up, my mother was such an incredibly beautiful woman and I found some old pictures of her and just cried at the harshness of time.
I saw a lot of old friends, even if I didn't get to spend much time with any of them. It is so hard trying to cram a year or more into a few short weeks.
We decided that we are moving to New Orleans after the end of this school year. I am ready to move back to the States now. I have enjoyed my time here for the most part, and will miss so many things about Spain, but it's time to go home now. I feel it now. I can't imagine living anywhere but the South and NOLA is just the logical answer. There is a huge yoga community there, multiple year round farmers markets, Whole Paycheck is there if I need it, the city is bikeable, Magazine Street is there if I need new clothes waiting with a Buffalo Exchange, and above and beyond anything else, the city is just fucking beautiful. I don't think I would be happy with another decision. I want to be in Louisiana and anywhere else would just be disappointing.
It has really caused me such an enormous amount of grief to finally decide to move home, but I just need to life to be a little bit easier for a while. My life here has not been that. Everything, from grocery shopping to making friends has been just hard. really really hard.
Business! My husband and I have a little business venture up our sleeve. I really don't want to jinx it by saying too much about it but we have been working hard when we can. There is still so, so much to be done it seems overwhelming, but for the first time ever in my life I have decided on something to concentrate my energies on. So, here's to Beleño Botanicals becoming a reality in 2011!
Also, for 2011 I want more joy. That's it really. To finally relax into the reality of my life and who I am and just enjoy it.
There was also a lot of stagnation as well. I got drunk last New Years Eve and fell on some hard tile floor and messed up my knee, and it hurt really really freaking bad for months, and then after that whenever I put pressure on it, so I used that as an excuse not to do yoga for such a long time. I went to class during August and then quit again due to financial stress. I haven't done any other type of physical activity, other than occasionally walking the dogs, as Dan takes on most of that responsibility. A responsibility that should be a joy and a blessing.
The only cure for stagnancy is action and really learning this lesson is so incredibly painful because my innate tendency is toward inaction, laziness and stagnation. Maybe I need to be more accepting of this?
My Christmas was nice. I loved seeing my parents, even though it pains me to see them age. As fucked up as she may have been when I was growing up, my mother was such an incredibly beautiful woman and I found some old pictures of her and just cried at the harshness of time.
I saw a lot of old friends, even if I didn't get to spend much time with any of them. It is so hard trying to cram a year or more into a few short weeks.
We decided that we are moving to New Orleans after the end of this school year. I am ready to move back to the States now. I have enjoyed my time here for the most part, and will miss so many things about Spain, but it's time to go home now. I feel it now. I can't imagine living anywhere but the South and NOLA is just the logical answer. There is a huge yoga community there, multiple year round farmers markets, Whole Paycheck is there if I need it, the city is bikeable, Magazine Street is there if I need new clothes waiting with a Buffalo Exchange, and above and beyond anything else, the city is just fucking beautiful. I don't think I would be happy with another decision. I want to be in Louisiana and anywhere else would just be disappointing.
It has really caused me such an enormous amount of grief to finally decide to move home, but I just need to life to be a little bit easier for a while. My life here has not been that. Everything, from grocery shopping to making friends has been just hard. really really hard.
Business! My husband and I have a little business venture up our sleeve. I really don't want to jinx it by saying too much about it but we have been working hard when we can. There is still so, so much to be done it seems overwhelming, but for the first time ever in my life I have decided on something to concentrate my energies on. So, here's to Beleño Botanicals becoming a reality in 2011!
Also, for 2011 I want more joy. That's it really. To finally relax into the reality of my life and who I am and just enjoy it.