Bending Under Pressure
Okay, hang on, let me just change.
Alright so.. Ever have one of those days where you get ridiculed, belittled, then covered in eggs? Kay good. As long as I'm not the only one.
Society, as I have bitched about time and time again and forever stand by, contains a very unfairly balanced social hierarchy. We've all heard the stories before, and experienced for ourselves what it's like to be pushed down, laughed at, and abused by the stereotypical male figure in power; Those money-hungry, profit-seeking managerial men that will take advantage of anyone and anything that will render a higher overall store value next invoice. After four years, I am still making minimum wage. My pushes seem too subtle. They push back twice as hard. Cut my hours, belittle me. Stand a few feet away and jerk off while they watch me work. Wait 'till I spend hours on cash, then come and tell me what I've been doing wrong. I called in sick one day during a produce shift. Big mistake. Just handing them the matches they can use to burn me. Now even the people that gave me comfort have shunned me. It makes it worse when even friends say straight up how pathetic I am.
There's a few people I can always count on, no matter what. A few people I know will constantly re-assure me that I am a wonderful person, well-worth being friends with. But day by day, the reality sinks in. Maybe I'm nice, maybe I'm caring, but honestly.. that's about it. Self-confidence, even with medication, is crumbling like a stale cracker. Nothing against crackers.. I enjoy most of them. Even my potential to do things is fading.
If I disregard my job as something important, and put all my hope into college this September (which I am certain to get accepted to), then all I need to do is succeed there... I need to push forward where I broke down before. That is my hope for a future. That is basically all the potential I have left. Just have to hold on and pull through..
Damnit. I'm emo again.
Alright so.. Ever have one of those days where you get ridiculed, belittled, then covered in eggs? Kay good. As long as I'm not the only one.
Society, as I have bitched about time and time again and forever stand by, contains a very unfairly balanced social hierarchy. We've all heard the stories before, and experienced for ourselves what it's like to be pushed down, laughed at, and abused by the stereotypical male figure in power; Those money-hungry, profit-seeking managerial men that will take advantage of anyone and anything that will render a higher overall store value next invoice. After four years, I am still making minimum wage. My pushes seem too subtle. They push back twice as hard. Cut my hours, belittle me. Stand a few feet away and jerk off while they watch me work. Wait 'till I spend hours on cash, then come and tell me what I've been doing wrong. I called in sick one day during a produce shift. Big mistake. Just handing them the matches they can use to burn me. Now even the people that gave me comfort have shunned me. It makes it worse when even friends say straight up how pathetic I am.
There's a few people I can always count on, no matter what. A few people I know will constantly re-assure me that I am a wonderful person, well-worth being friends with. But day by day, the reality sinks in. Maybe I'm nice, maybe I'm caring, but honestly.. that's about it. Self-confidence, even with medication, is crumbling like a stale cracker. Nothing against crackers.. I enjoy most of them. Even my potential to do things is fading.
If I disregard my job as something important, and put all my hope into college this September (which I am certain to get accepted to), then all I need to do is succeed there... I need to push forward where I broke down before. That is my hope for a future. That is basically all the potential I have left. Just have to hold on and pull through..
Damnit. I'm emo again.