| melting already [ {full}

[learneditall]

Who: River Tam & Darc/Tifa/Terra
When: After Izaya's arrival post.
Where: Planet's Core.
What: Fighting, being rescued, spouting bits of ridiculous crypticness at people's faces in person... whatever's good.
Type: Log
Notes/Warnings: This will end in tears or violence. But no real warnings for now.

Comments

♥~

[learneditall]

No. No, no, no, no, no.

River unconsciously bit down on the upper edge of her lower lip. She didn't know how to say it. She never knew how to say the things that her mind murmured to her quietly, the things she picked up without details, the things she learned from the slight tear in the seam at the bottom of a person's pantleg that told her the entire story of their last few years. The sigh that escaped her was unintentionally childish, a slight look of frenzy glimmering in her wide tired eyes as she took a slight swaying step forward.

"He isn't mine," she almost begged, willing herself to be understood but feeling the hot wave of emotions she couldn't stop crashing through her system, short-circuiting the part of her brain that still spoke like a girl rather than a riddle. "He's just like me. His eyes are in the sky and he... he can't go with just one wing. There's too many pieces left, not enough feathers, not whole, not anymore."

The urgency of communication seemed to catch her off-guard as it flew out of her like a torrent. Shaking slightly, River glanced away, lifting her free hand to the side of her face to press hard against her temple. A futile, juvenile attempt to make the information stop flowing into and out of her brain.

"He's not himself. Not like they remember. He wasn't supposed to be like this."

*kissyfaces* ♥~

[lightning_fists]

They were incoherent at first, nothing more than a string of nonsensical phrases. Separate, they were pointless and held no meaning. Together, though, they were as familiar as her own reflection in the mirror. Together, the barmaid realized, they described Cloud down to the last corner of his personality. And that was unnerving enough. But was the girl talking of him, or someone that she knew? No names were ever mentioned, only the mysterious 'he' that seemed to be broken and lost.

And when she took that step forward, Tifa could only instinctively take a wary step back in reaction.

Who was this girl?

But though every inch of the fighter in her was telling Tifa to be careful and cautious, the maternal half of the young woman's mind could not help but be concerned about the way the other's hand shook with unease. With how helpless she seemed in her own skin. "Are... are you ok? Who're you talking about?"

/faaaails way back into the log D: ♥

[learneditall]

The flicker was brief, but River caught at what seemed to be recognition on the other woman's face as she glanced back over. It steadied the shakiness of her breath, brought her pulse down a hair, stopped the overwhelming swell of information in her own mind so that she could think a thought that belonged to herself rather than the void.

It was childishness. It was sickness. It was the place where the knife had scraped away something inside her and let everything that didn't belong crash into her like a dam being burst after years of quiet. River kept the hand on her temple, trying to focus on it long enough to answer the careful question, to stop the incessant stream now that she had clearly hooked the attention she'd wanted, although the reasons had fluttered from her like a departing flock of butterflies.

Or was it a rabble? A flutter? A swarm?

"I... can't see that far..."

The girl frowned against her own palm, struggling for the proper word for an assemblage of lepidopterans. It eluded her, was blocked by swirling thoughts of a person she didn't know, overwhelmed by yet another story swimming before her eyes.

*pets and reminds herself that RM logs need tending to >>;*

[lightning_fists]

Everything about this situation was foreign to Tifa. Granted there were times in the past where members of AVALANCHE struggled with their own psyche - and again, a brief thought went to Cloud and the times when Sephiroth held control over her childhood friend's mind before drifting over to a moment where Vincent was having problems with the demons underneath his skin - but neither men had ever gave voice to the images that they saw. Her thoughts seemed so disjointed and incomplete, and there was no telling just what they referred to, whether the thoughts were from her own experiences, or straight from Tifa's memory.

Was she reading Tifa's thoughts? Her memories? And if so, what would the young girl do with them?

There were thousands of reasons for her to simply remain where she was, to turn away, even, and leave the girl to sort through her own thoughts. Tifa held no ties to this person, and there were people out there who too priority for people who needed her help. But the maternal voice that guided the barmaid through the majority of her life would not allow such a cold and heartless thing to happen. Instead, there was simply an overwhelming need to reach out to her. To help and comfort where she could.

And it was with that thought that Tifa took a careful step forward, cautious but more concerned about how to help the other through this... mental fit. And make sense of it. "What... what do you see?"

*bemoans the multigame... only not at all, really*

[learneditall]

River couldn't remember the last time someone had asked her that sort of question. Well, no, she could distinctly remember the last time her brother had asked her about it, had unleashed wave after wave of pain in her mind and wrenched her out of reality completely until the drugs had dulled her senses into a stupor again and his arms had held her pieces together long enough to become a girl again. Since being here, however, there were only questions. Why did she talk like that, couldn't she speak clearly, why did she insist on behaving like such a silly child? This woman's question was serious. Thoughtful.

She wanted to answer it badly.

Her body continued to waver slightly, caught off-guard by an imaginary wind rippling through the air around them. Everything felt tight--her chest, her eyes, her limbs, her mind--contracting in on itself as herself that was still herself struggled for control of her stupid lips. Lost, trapped, inhaling like it was something of a chore, the girl set her less-than-perfectly-focused eyes on the young woman. "...everything. It hurts, a little."

*shuffles in all embarrassed like; wanted to wait til the battle was done before continuing this*

[lightning_fists]

It was clear that there was some sort of struggling going on within the girl. Years of watching the emotions and confusion flit across Cloud's face had given Tifa the tools to see it within others, or so she liked to believe. But then again, there were so many people in her small circle of a family -- because indeed, family was what they were -- who were less than vocal, so the knowledge came in handy on many occasions. She didn't want to intrude, though. Because it was one thing to mentally analyze on a friend in their hidden thoughts. But it was another to read the intimate thoughts of a stranger.

Despite that, the young woman could not help but take another step closer towards the girl, thinking that she would and could collapse at any moment given the physical cues of her condition. Or hold out a hand to her through pure instinct alone, letting it hover over the other's shoulder just in case. She was more than welcome to accept or decline the offer if she wished. Tifa only wanted her to know that it was an option. "Where does it hurt?"

fair call, m'love!

[learneditall]

Hesitation flickered openly over the girl's face. Most often, when people asked that, it was because they intended to do something about it. Stick her with needles, force pills down her throat, strap her down into a useless pile of limbs until she stopped screaming. So it was now River's turn to take a wary half-step back, eyes slightly wide and briefly concerned.

She didn't make it far, of course, because the estimation was correct--too much movement led to falling over. Admittedly, River fell with grace. It was more of a folding when her knees decided for themselves that they were simply done supporting her weight for the moment, and her torso was inclined to move accordingly to the ground.

The getting there looked like slightly boneless sitting down. The sitting itself looked like an exhausted flop.

"Inside."

now if I can only manage to make more than one in a week, that'd be awesome

[lightning_fists]

That had been enough of a signal for Tifa as she quickly backed off enough so as not to startle the young girl into a state of panic. And made a mental note not to attempt touching her again until she was more calm. Until then, the barmaid would just have to settle for being within arm's length as she knelt down beside the other, too slow to catch her when she had started falling and too quick to truly know whether it had been on purpose or accident. Given the way she had fallen, it was hard to tell. And Tifa had been concentrating more on giving the younger girl her space than anything else.

Her brows furrowed slightly at the single word that passed from the other's lips though, knowing what it meant, but not really understanding where the problem was. "Inside, where?"