Imperfection/Adventure/Hormones
I feel like an idiot for adopting a kitten last week. What I really wanted was Tosca back, but there is no way to replace our sweet elderly lady. A warm thing that loves us to brighten our home life. The snotnose teen that nips us, attacks my trees and peed on the rug yesterday is a pain in the butt. I am thinking about giving him back to the family we got him from.
I feel like an idiot for getting pregnant again. It probably won't even work out, but if it does, I'm feeling like it'll be all misery and responsibility with no reward. I'm not excited because I'm worried about miscarrying again, but I'm also not excited because I can't remember, at the moment, why I wanted to do this.
There's no perfect cat and there's no perfect kid. And no perfect partner, either. I guess one can seclude oneself until the perfect thing comes along, the perfect life is all set up, but even if it does, it won't be. Any action taken will result in mistakes and uncertainty. Adventure means taking the bad with the good, I know that. But adventures seem stupid at the moment, more trouble than they're worth.
I would like to be able to joyfully embrace my own imperfections and life's chaotic surprises, but instead I am feeling trapped and resentful.
I wanted to focus on a new career, a car-free life and lots of foreign travel, and it seems like everything I'm doing is going in the opposite direction.
Yes, I am hormonal and having a mood swing. And it sucks.
I feel like an idiot for getting pregnant again. It probably won't even work out, but if it does, I'm feeling like it'll be all misery and responsibility with no reward. I'm not excited because I'm worried about miscarrying again, but I'm also not excited because I can't remember, at the moment, why I wanted to do this.
There's no perfect cat and there's no perfect kid. And no perfect partner, either. I guess one can seclude oneself until the perfect thing comes along, the perfect life is all set up, but even if it does, it won't be. Any action taken will result in mistakes and uncertainty. Adventure means taking the bad with the good, I know that. But adventures seem stupid at the moment, more trouble than they're worth.
I would like to be able to joyfully embrace my own imperfections and life's chaotic surprises, but instead I am feeling trapped and resentful.
I wanted to focus on a new career, a car-free life and lots of foreign travel, and it seems like everything I'm doing is going in the opposite direction.
Yes, I am hormonal and having a mood swing. And it sucks.