weather forecast
"After patchy morning fog, there will be plenty of sunshine with low humidity and a warm afternoon. Highs will be in the mid-80s with wind from the NE at 4-8 mph. The probability of precipitation is ZERO."
This forecast may be a metaphor for my life. "Patchy morning fog" - it's not like everything has gone perfectly for me, but nothing irredeemably disastrous has occurred. But today, though, there is nothing to complain about. I think I like my work as much as I'm likely to ever like work (i.e. not as much as I like watching TV or basically doing anything that's now work). This litigation stuff seems like it was designed for me. It is interesting and I am good at it. And they pay me a lot to do it. I work very hard and feel like it should be more compared to what the slackers at work get, but I can't say I'm having trouble making it on my salary. I get to drive all over the place in my car. I've got this house all to myself. I'm staying in shape - the last couple weeks I ran two miles in just over 13 minutes and a 5K in under 23 on the treadmill and wasn't even that tired. Sure I could cover those distances in 11-something and 18-something in high school, but I only run a couple times a week now, not daily like I did then. And on top of that, the weather has been perfect.
But it's because the weather has been perfect that I think I need to move. It's not going to stay this way. It's going to get cold, and I'm going to be depressed. And I'll be depressed until May when it gets nice again. I should just deal with it, but I can't. And I'm not sure I can take another how-ever-many-years-until-I-retire/die of this cycle of 8 months of depression and 4 months of feeling fine.
A recruiter this week called about Raleigh. 51 degrees average temperature in January! A small firm with lots of people from top schools and high caliber work - not bad. Salary below market but around what I'm making. I can waive into NC without taking a bar exam. All good stuff. In the first place, I'm kicking ass at my current firm. Do I really want to wipe that away and go somewhere else...especially for approximately the same salary? And am I going to get higher quality work? I'm already trying cases where I am. But even setting that stuff aside, am I really going to move 500 miles to a city I've been to ONE time for a few HOURS in my whole life? A city that's an hour and a half from anyone I know? That's who knows how far from anyone I'm related to? A city with a bunch of UNC and Duke students and grads whose basketball teams I hate? A city that's still small enough that they have just one major sports team...and it's a hockey team? I've got my misgivings about Charlotte and Atlanta for the same job-related reasons. But at least I know people there. At least they are legitimate big cities. And I could make a lot more money at least.
The thing is, I wouldn't even consider moving if it weren't for the weather. Pittsburgh is a city of white, catholic, conservative steeler fans like me. It's also provincial and everyone knows each other and it's difficult to find dates or friends, but is that really going to improve somewhere where there are a bunch of people who don't even have much in common, just because there are more of them and they are more open-minded? My parents are a two-hour drive away, my grandparents and godparents an hour away. Unlike most people I know, they actually are interested in spending time with me. They actually think I'm doing well for myself. I generally think that, too, but the general lack of acclaim anyone else has for anything I do sometimes causes me to forget it. I don't know. Weather is big. But how big is it?
This forecast may be a metaphor for my life. "Patchy morning fog" - it's not like everything has gone perfectly for me, but nothing irredeemably disastrous has occurred. But today, though, there is nothing to complain about. I think I like my work as much as I'm likely to ever like work (i.e. not as much as I like watching TV or basically doing anything that's now work). This litigation stuff seems like it was designed for me. It is interesting and I am good at it. And they pay me a lot to do it. I work very hard and feel like it should be more compared to what the slackers at work get, but I can't say I'm having trouble making it on my salary. I get to drive all over the place in my car. I've got this house all to myself. I'm staying in shape - the last couple weeks I ran two miles in just over 13 minutes and a 5K in under 23 on the treadmill and wasn't even that tired. Sure I could cover those distances in 11-something and 18-something in high school, but I only run a couple times a week now, not daily like I did then. And on top of that, the weather has been perfect.
But it's because the weather has been perfect that I think I need to move. It's not going to stay this way. It's going to get cold, and I'm going to be depressed. And I'll be depressed until May when it gets nice again. I should just deal with it, but I can't. And I'm not sure I can take another how-ever-many-years-until-I-retire/die of this cycle of 8 months of depression and 4 months of feeling fine.
A recruiter this week called about Raleigh. 51 degrees average temperature in January! A small firm with lots of people from top schools and high caliber work - not bad. Salary below market but around what I'm making. I can waive into NC without taking a bar exam. All good stuff. In the first place, I'm kicking ass at my current firm. Do I really want to wipe that away and go somewhere else...especially for approximately the same salary? And am I going to get higher quality work? I'm already trying cases where I am. But even setting that stuff aside, am I really going to move 500 miles to a city I've been to ONE time for a few HOURS in my whole life? A city that's an hour and a half from anyone I know? That's who knows how far from anyone I'm related to? A city with a bunch of UNC and Duke students and grads whose basketball teams I hate? A city that's still small enough that they have just one major sports team...and it's a hockey team? I've got my misgivings about Charlotte and Atlanta for the same job-related reasons. But at least I know people there. At least they are legitimate big cities. And I could make a lot more money at least.
The thing is, I wouldn't even consider moving if it weren't for the weather. Pittsburgh is a city of white, catholic, conservative steeler fans like me. It's also provincial and everyone knows each other and it's difficult to find dates or friends, but is that really going to improve somewhere where there are a bunch of people who don't even have much in common, just because there are more of them and they are more open-minded? My parents are a two-hour drive away, my grandparents and godparents an hour away. Unlike most people I know, they actually are interested in spending time with me. They actually think I'm doing well for myself. I generally think that, too, but the general lack of acclaim anyone else has for anything I do sometimes causes me to forget it. I don't know. Weather is big. But how big is it?