(Untitled)
Who: Roronoa Zoro (threesword), Sanji (baratiesbest), Umi Ryuuzaki (embracethewaves)
Where: Outside the Northern Lights
When: August 11th, During the party at the lights
Rating: PG-13 at least :|
Summary: Things finally reach their breaking point between the two Straw Hats.
the log: ( We can only go on like this for so long )
Where: Outside the Northern Lights
When: August 11th, During the party at the lights
Rating: PG-13 at least :|
Summary: Things finally reach their breaking point between the two Straw Hats.
the log: ( We can only go on like this for so long )
Weird. Just weird.
The party had been an incredible success -- Hikaru looked really happy at the surprise, and everyone had a good time. The food, the people...everything was perfect. Except that she had left Hikaru's present back at the Gohl house, of course...which was what she was fixing now. The small girl had offered to come with her, but that would have ruined the surprise, wouldn't it? Besides, it might give her a chance to make some friends.
So she rounded the corner, heading back to the brownstone -- quickly. It was cold, and she didn't want to miss too much.
That was when she heard a crash -- shouting -- ...fighting? Was someone in trouble? A confused frown crossed her face and she paused...but really, there was no way she wouldn't take a detour to see what was going on. What if someone was hurt?
She was quiet when she approached, no less cautious of Discedo's usual dangers, walking closer to get a better idea of what was going on. Whatever it was, it sounded like a big fight.
When she saw what was happening...she stopped cold. Two people she thought were friends, comrades -- two of the people she had become closest to in the whole city. Zoro and Sanji...fighting like they were just about ready to kill each other. Her heart beat heavily in her chest, a dull thud-thud that seemed to shudder through her. This...what was this? A chill seemed to come over her, and for a moment she couldn't even begin to fathom what to say. She tried, she did -- she opened her mouth, took a breath. But...nothing.
Then: her hands tensed. The cold feeling disappeared, replaced by something that burned like...anger? fear? worry? Maybe all of those. Either way, she hardly hesitated, now, even though her hands were shaking -- she thrust a hand in the air and sucked in a deep, fierce breath.
"WATER DRAGON!!"
The huge, magical waterspout that followed sped toward the two, snaking between them like a barrier. If it brushed against them, it would probably sting quite a bit, but she was careful not to hit either of them full-on with ut.
And there she stood, dropping her hand down, staring at the two with eyes wide and hands shaking.
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Shit.
Shit.
This night couldn't get much worse. Of all the people to pass this way it had to be her - the object of their rivalry. He remained silent, wide-eyed, staring at her in disbelief until the initial shock subsided and he had to look away. Ashamed he took a couple of steps back to increase the distance between himself and the idiot marimo, shoulders slumped in defeat.
Now would be a good time for the scientists to swoop in and send any of them home. The cook had a feeling that the conversation that was to follow would hurt a lot more than the mass of cuts on his chest.
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Well. This sucked.
Standing in position to fight was no longer an option. In a couple of pained motions, all three swords had made their way back to their scabbards. He didn't look up at all. This was not something Umi was going to take to well at all.
Really, he wanted nothing more but to just collapse right then. Everything hurt. His shoulder throbbed, he could feel the cracks in his ribs, and he was covered in blood from head to do.
Sleep would do well right that. But that wasn't an option. So instead, he turned away from both the magic knight and and the cook with eyes closed.
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She was quiet for a little while; the shaking in her limbs only seemed to get worse with the silence. She didn't understand, and that was something she readily admitted -- no amount of watching the two of them would change that.
Maybe she had been wrong. Maybe everything she had assumed had been wrong up to this point. It made her feel small and stupid and childish...the same way she felt about the way she had been during her first stay in Cephiro. In the end, maybe she didn't really know anything. Maybe she didn't know how to listen.
But the silence was getting to be too much.
"...What do you guys think you're doing?!" she said at last, shouting now, her voice wavering a bit -- it didn't stop her from going on. "You two...what IS this?! You're supposed to be friends, right! ...Nakama! RIGHT?! I thought that meant...family, friendship, trust! But you two-- looking at each other like you're ready to kill...what is this?!"
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What the hell could he say to that? She deserved a response but as much as he wanted to give it to her the words just weren't there. Sanji sighed, a shuddering breath shaky with pain and adrenalin followed by a slight cough. Still nothing and in an attempt to buy some time he went for the pack of cigarettes - maybe the soothing effects of nicotine would hold an answer.
Nakama. Friendship. Trust. Family. Closest thing to a brother he could ever get, and then this...
He didn't understand it any better than she did. Not how it had gone this far at least, even though he knew the reasons behind most of their fights the past nine months. But he couldn't very well say it was all because of her, could he? Better to lie, throw out some flat cliché and hope that she'd still be talking to him after all this.
Inhale. Exhale. Eyes still firmly fixed on the ground, hands shaking. And then the only thing he could think of that wasn't utter bullshit.
"...things change."
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Just as Umi had becoming someone very important to Zoro, somewhere deep under the surface, Sanji had too. He'd joined the Straw Hats after seeing what it really meant to never give up on dreams. And sure, Zoro would roll his eyes when you could practically see his eyes turning into hearts when Nami walked by. And he'd be the first to challenge the cook to see who could get the most meat. Any petty competition to keep their rivalry going.
But Zoro reveled in that. That sort of rivalry was like no other. Sanji was different. They could fight all day, but at the end of it, there was a mutual understanding that made it gratifying. It didn't take long to accept him as a part of the crew. Underneath it all, they were friends. Brothers. If one of them was in a bind, the other would always be right there to bail them out (though not without a snarky comment or five).
At least, that's what it used to be. Lately, and now - especially now - things were only a shell of what they used to be. Friendly spars had turned into near death experiences. They nearly always fought, but it was more vicious. It was the type that tore at your skin. It was like salt in an open wound every time.
What the hell had they become?
This... this wouldn't be easy to recover from. In the past, they'd always been able to mend things. But this... they'd both taken things too far. And nobody but Umi knew. The rest of the crew... what would happen? How would Luffy react?
This could have been the end of Nakama as they'd known it. Of the Straw Hats...
All Zoro could do at this point was agree with Sanji. He couldn't even bring himself to say anything. He didn't want to. Still facing the other way, he gave his head a nod.
The swordsman couldn't believe it, but he was actually feeling guilty for all of this.
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Umi stared in disbelief for a moment. Friendship had always seemed so solid and unquestionable to her -- rock-steady. Hikaru and Fuu had taught her that. Even them...she hadn't known them long, in Cephiro, and at first, sure, they had bickered. She had snapped. But people that you would give your life to save...could "things changing" really ruin a thing like that? Could this place do something like that?
...No. It was something she refused to believe. If anything, friendship in this city was precious, far more important than it could have ever been in Tokyo... If she hadn't made the friends she did here, she might never have survived on her own! Even here, she could still care for the people she had met -- both of them were included in that! Wasn't that what Nakama was about, too? The same friendship that had brought her together with Hikaru and Fuu, the sort of friendship that could deliver strength through the good times and the bad...
Things didn't just change like that!
"...That's not--" She hadn't been with them on any of their adventures. The world Zoro and Sanji came from wasn't her world, wasn't anything like it. But the stories they had told, the adventures they recounted, the things they shared...that was enough. "All the things you've done-- both of you. Both of you!" She was yelling again -- she couldn't help it. It made her angry, it scared her, it... It was something that wasn't supposed to happen. Her voice still shook even while she did; she stubbornly tried to keep it even, tried to keep the sting of tears out of her eyes. "And you would give all of that up...for what?! Don't be so stupid! There's nothing in the world worth giving that up for!"
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But... someone had to say something. The tone of Umi's voice and the tears in her eyes were more than enough to completely shatter the cooks heart. It hurt, not only to see her like this but also the reason behind it. They had come so far, moved on from silly bickering to something deeper. Zoro wasn't just a crew mate, he was a friend. A confidante. Or rather... he had been. What happened after this was anyones guess.
Someone had to say something. She deserved that much, a little slice of truth even though it would probably do even more damage. Not that it could get much worse.
"There is."
His voice was surprisingly steady even though his hands wouldn't stop shaking. Sanji paused, took another deep drag on that cigarette before he exhaled, followed that plume of smoke until it vanished. Here goes nothing.
"You."
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Zoro quietly sputtered. His back was still to them, which made it a bit easier to hide the terrified expression that had taken over his face. He couldn't believe any of this was happening.
Eventually, he found himself able to turn around, though he still couldn't bring his eyes to meet with either of the people there. It was hard enough to hear the quiver in Umi's voice - he knew that seeing her cry would be one of the most painful things right now - more so than any physical injury he had. He knew he had to say something, but nothing came out at first. This really was unlike anything else he'd ever experienced in his 20 years.
"Yeah..." He finally managed to spew out, speaking quietly. What else could he say... really?
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You. That one little word was enough to render her speechless, to twist her stomach into knots. The static and animosity between them had been there -- that much she knew. But...because of her? She had never noticed. Or maybe she had never looked, never wanted to think about the possibility of something like this happening... It made her feel sick.
She really...did have a lot of growing up to do. That was what it was starting to look like.
Still -- was it really a good reason? If, heaven forbid, the same thing happened between her and Hikaru or Fuu...or even someone from school -- someone from the fencing team, or anyone like that... Would she have been able to do the same? The heart...was really important. She knew that. Emeraude and Zagato had died for the love they shared. But friendship was part of it, too, and it was just as important. Was love supposed to be this difficult and painful -- this complicated? Did people really have to sacrifice friendship for something like that?
It was a terrible idea, and something she would fight to the very end. To sacrifice anything for a reason like that...couldn't be the only road a person could take. She cared about Zoro and Sanji, both, deeply -- she knew that much. They were two of her closest friends there. And...she had thought they were just as close. They seemed that way at first, for a long time. 'Things changed,' but it was also their feelings, their minds, their own choices and maybe stubbornness, that had changed things into something like this.
"A reason like that--" She felt herself tense up a little. She wouldn't cry -- she refused to. This wasn't some moment where a damsel needs comfort from a dashing prince, it wasn't like a fairy tale or anything like that. It was real, painfully so, and messy as anything could be. This was two of her best friends breaking apart due to the choice they had made...to fight over her? It seemed ridiculous, and even so, they had nearly killed each other over something like that...! It took only a few paces for her to reach them and when she did, she delivered a quick, hard slap across the cheek -- first to one, then to the other. "Idiots...both of you--!"
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They were idiots. Stubborn fucking morons. Cowards. And she got hurt by it.
Unforgivable.
The problem wasn't new, it had started the very day he arrived in Discedo and reached the first climax not even two months after that. The first day of the year, it had been cold just like today with the streets covered in snow. The damn marimo had almost killed him that day but they had worked through it somehow. Settled their differences. So much had happened since then, they were supposed to be different.
Yet here they were. Snow on the street and blood on his shirt and it was all so fucking familiar. Had they really gotten nowhere..? Or were they just too stupid to even attempt to really fix the problem? Quick solutions, temporary truces that only lasted as long as both of them were occupied with something else. Zoro had at least been honest with her, while he... the timing had never been right. For once he had listened to the shitty marimo and played it safe - she didn't need this kind of stress and honestly, Zoro could use a head start. There were other girls, though they never measured up to her.
So many excuses and so little words that actually meant something. Sanji remained silent, unconsciously holding his breath as he waited for something to break the silence.
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Silence had become apart of his vocabulary - or rather - the only thing in it within a matter of minutes. There was absolutely nothing the swordsman could say that would right this situation. He was poor enough with words often enough as it was. Of course, there were his rare moments where his thoughts would pour out into a cohesive monologue - but now really didn't appear to be one of those times.
This had gone on for too long. Too many fight with Sanji, too many things held back... he wished for it to be simple again.
Maybe that entailed walking away from the situation.
Zoro wasn't sure. He could only assume that doing so would only hurt Umi more... but he could see how angry she was about it. And it was rightfully so. But he and Sanji, the swordsman wasn't so sure that time could repair the damage that had been done this time. He'd been out of line - both of them had.
As he thought about it in silence, he pulled the bandanna off his head and tied it to his forearm - just where they'd placed bandages over the "X" back on the Grand Line. It was only the tiniest of efforts - and one that probably flew right over Umi's head. But Zoro didn't know what else he could do at this point.
This had been why he never wanted anyone to know about what he felt for Umi. In the long run, it had only made things worse. But he couldn't sit in complete silence. He didn't make eye contact with the girl or the cook, but eventually, the words came out of his mouth.
"...
.....You're right. We are."
Apologies wouldn't be enough... not for any of them right at the moment.
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She was still a little angry. Angry at them for never saying anything, and at herself for casting a blind eye over the whole thing. For never noticing, for never changing... She hadn't forgotten what Zoro said, like he told her to. But she had let herself become preoccupied, and maybe now it was too late.
...She still didn't even know how to respond, though. Not really.
They were idiots, that was for sure -- but how much better was she, in that case? Not knowing her own feelings. Maybe not wanting to know. It was always something that had seemed so...foreign, and something she hadn't worried about. She hated that...they had determined in Cephiro to live without regrets, and now people she cared about were hurting over something that she might have been able to do something about. If she had only thought about it a bit.
"...I'm sorry." Even if it wasn't enough, it was something -- enough to break the silence that kept stretching on between the three of them. "I'm not much better...for letting it get to this point. I let myself ignore things I shouldn't have."
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He seemed to say that a lot lately. Sanji took one last shaky inhale on that burnt down cigarette before letting it fall in an attempt to seek some courage. Guidance. The silence was just as bad as it had been the past couple of months - always silent about what was important, bottling it up until they ended up where they were now.
Enough. They couldn't hide behind the bond of nakama or male pride or honor anymore. Umi had been hurt by it all and that was more than enough to call for retreat. He didn't deserve her after all, not after tonight. As much as it pained him to think it Zoro was by far the better choice - if she still wanted to be near either of them.
How difficult can it be to throw away your pride?!
Not difficult at all when you've been doing it for all your life. Sanji swallowed, took a deep breath. Prepared. And when he finally spoke again his voice came out restrained, polite, almost cold.
"It's true that we've been acting like idiots, but when it comes down to it... it's my fault. I haven't been honest with you and that in itself is unforgivable. I can only hope that-"
He was running out of words. Admitting defeat wasn't easy and it left him feeling sick to his stomach - but someone had to. Better him than Zoro right now. They had fought over her like kids, so wrapped up in their shitty pride and constant rivalry to stop and think about what they were actually doing. And now they had both lost.
"I'm sorry. It was never my intention to complicate things like this... you deserve better."
And with that he fell silent again, shoulders slumped and eyes closed like a condemned man waiting for the noose to tighten.
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When push came to shove, he'd had no reason to fight the cook. Sanji had done nothing wrong. He flirted with all the girls - and he'd fallen for this one. It wasn't his fault that it happened to be the very same one Zoro had crashed for. As much as he wanted to fault his crewmate for that, he couldn't.
But they were both at fault for how they'd handled it. Zoro for telling her to forget it, for being so hard on Sanji, and for picking all the fights. Sanji for not saying anything. Both of them for their mutual silence, and just how things had been handled.
They'd both failed - as friends and as men. There was no denying it.
But as the cook spoke, Zoro raised his head slightly, examining Sanji's mannerisms. He looked like a child who'd just been scolded and shamed. Zoro could only imagine that he looked just the same. And maybe it was wrong to do so - but he wasn't going to let Sanji take that much of the blame for it.
There was a chance that his relationship with Umi wouldn't recover, based on her tone alone. There was an even greater chance that things between he and Sanji would be damaged forever as well. There was no saying. All he knew was he'd been hurting people he'd grown to care about more than he'd ever planned... and even if it took everything in him, he was going to try and mend it as best he could.
It was death before giving up, after all.
"Yeah," He spoke quietly. Thoughtful. More calculated than people usually gave him credit for. "I... we should have said something earlier. You shouldn't have been put through any of this."
There was another pause, and in a strange and swift motion, Sandai Kitetsu had been withdrawn, slamming the blade into the concrete. He was angry, but not with Sanji for the first time in months. It was at himself for all the trouble that had been caused.
"Guess this is what happens when you get involved with pirates."
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...It was selfish, in a sense, and maybe that was another reason to apologize. Discedo wasn't a place she ever wanted to wish upon anyone...but it was the only place she had a connection to the friends she had made here.
"Deserving more...and being put through anything..." she began. The words caused the knot in Umi's stomach to tighten again. Anger, impatience -- that was the feeling. She hated those words. Hated that these guys thought they were necessary. Hated that they were trying to decide that for her.
"Who do you think," she added, "has the right to decide those things?"
That was what friendship was, after all...being yourself. Trusting people to see who you really were, what you thought, how you felt. Trusting that friends would be honest, no matter what.
Zoro's comment made a small smile flicker across her face. Nothing but trouble...really was something typical with these guys. "Hey...I knew what I was in for when I first met you troublemakers, you know."
Still able to tease a bit...but she was still worried -- and maybe confused. She didn't want things to just stay the way they were, but otherwise she wasn't sure what she wanted. What she could ask of them. What she knew was, her life wouldn't have been the same without either of those two idiots...and no matter what, she would fight for their friendship in any way, if she had to.
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