Good god more memories of jen
So... you're at the library. What the damn. I tried calling you just about a half hour ago or so to ask if you could keep an eye on the mail area in case my package came. But it is better that you move your limbs around! Breathe air!
-
That is funny about your knife, but i'll just talk to you about that later on today in real life... outside of planet myspace... planet ourspace... planet sourface. Yow!-
-
All your eathereal pennies are belong to my bear pod. -
-
shit fuck hell damn. i feel swell. :)
-
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: May 11, 2005 1:07 PM
Well, frank I don't liek your mom at all. And you can tell her I said so. Or I'll tell her to her face, I aint no pussie. Bleh.
I'm over at the nashua library. Apparently after all the bullshit I went through with them taking my knife from me in columbus, and me trying to get it sent here but then sending it to manchester because it would cost more for some stupid reason, apparently none of that meant anything because it got sent to nachua afterall. dumbasses. Fucking retarded. But anyway, I have my knife back.
So you were going to stick a lime on my face, were you?
What happened, turn yellow? A yellow chicken liver? Yum! Speaking fo which I just went through the neighborhood where the mexican boxer's wife made me that dinner with chicken livers in it. Egads. Key blimey pie. Mhh, key lime pie... Thats what we could do with all your limes! But they're not key limes... O well, fuck you.
love.
Well save your ethereal pennies because ethereal pennies make ethereal dollars make ethereal richness. Just don't spend them at all except on necessities like ethereal cars and ethereal houses. Ethereal food and clothing. Ethereal etc.
Ethereal peace out
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 29, 2005 9:49 AM
Well, i have a moustache... how do i turn that into a moo-stash? Do i need milk? And lucky me, i happen to already be wearing spikes and leather pants. Wow, this might be easier than i thought. Who wasn't trying?!?!? It wasn't me, i'm sure. No, i want doritos... doritos with some kind of soda that has lime in it.
I think i'll put a little slice of lime on your face. Good god would that be fantastic.
The talk wasn't about you guys not getting along, it was more of a "this is what i think is wrong with you guys and your relationship from what i have seen and assumed from the lessons of my own life" vs. the "you have only seen us together at your house, with nothing to do but wait for some grub. Try climbing a tree with him and see how that goes." Very un0interesting. Very typical. How boring. I'm sorry.
I waste my ethereal pennies on all kinds of things! Mostly everything that doesn't connect or have flow, hence the currency and it's rapage known as pennies. But everything does serve it's purpose, so i guess those things that i do for people have theirs, but sometimes i just feel like i'm missing something. I know now that it's not my fault though. Way to be the outcast. Or the Outkast.
Yee. :)
~bizarro nuts, i mean, face~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 29, 2005 10:25 AM
Well, if you want to write an un-gay email, first you grow a moo-stash. Then you dress yourself in spikes and ultra-tuff leather pants and vest(s). THEN you only write your emails after working out vigorously, and showering afterwards with, your fellow moo-stash wearing spike totin' heterophobes.
A prophet of prophets!? Oh you told me about that once. Well... bah. A blarg on both your houses! I'm just kidding, le sigh, wouldn't want to be usin' my prophecyin skillz for the negative.
So you had a chat with my mom about why I didn't get along with her so swell?? Just tell her I have LD and ADD and I hate my own mother besides, and I'm sure she'll understand, and at least believe that she does. But seriously, I think she's alright, I just don't get along with people at first, unless they're really cool, and that is rare. Like the way I like my meat; in your hair. Like the way I comb my face; through the air. Like the way my meat is kept; unaware. Like the way I pound the street; over there.
Like the way I lick my sauce; from afar. Like the way I dig lip gloss; with a car. Like the way I chain my beast; in the tar. Like the way I have my feast; in a jar.
What are you wasting your ethereal pennies on, dear?
Your the greatest. Your the best thing going on in my life. Your the only thing that makes me really happy. It's true, your.
Yes, no more junk food. Only real fried fats and PIE. Cut out the middle man. Or... possibly add some onto your middle... non-teehee.
Grommet shanebows and fart vitamins!!!!!!!????????*
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 28, 2005 1:23 PM
Okay, my emails are gay. Sorry. Teach me of your wonderous ways my master.
I told my mom you were a prophet of prophets.
I also told her that she and her house are not fun. She said her house was not built for children. And that she admits that she is serious. I then informed her that it is not that she is serious, it is that she is no fun. Full circle.
I am sad because sometimes i get to worried that i can't do enough for others. It kills me. It makes me feel guilty for wasting time, space, universal mental pennies.
No more cheeze its for me.
No more junk food like that, it makes me feel ick, i decided that yesterday.
I want to vomit rainbows!!!!!!!
And rain vombows!!!!!
Bane vows.
Tame cows.
I love it when you use "you're" for "you are" and not "your."
~penis~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 28, 2005 2:16 PM
Well did you see the real one!? WTF! No appreciation.
Oh right, corn dog. I g2g.
Van morrison loves you, though. Why are you sad? Should I call? Are you out of cheezits??
OUR emails aren't gay. YOURS are.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 28, 2005 12:57 PM
I know, i was just playing.
That's right, burn the pizza, protest! Stab in the cafeteria and stab them with your plastic forks! It's the revolution!!! Oh, i mean, uh, eat all the junk food while you can now, there ain't much up here.
I love Van Morrison. Though right now it makes me want to cry. But it's real enjoyable music. Oh whoaaaa, domino. :(
Hugging is good.
Wow, our emails are real gay, let's not ever let anyone see them. Poof.
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 28, 2005 1:49 PM
oh come on, now.... it's just your myspace page... oh wait. Oh fuck I'm so sorry, what was I thinking??
Well its time for.... fuck, i already burned one pizza making your damn background and i almost burnt two corn dogs just now. O well it's ok. Cuz when I get there, we're going to... I don't know, EAT LOTS OF GOOD FOOD! and hug. I'm sorry.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 28, 2005 11:26 AM
Alright, wonderful. My page is a fucking mess. Oh well. And uh, well, i do prefer to be shown how to do something, rather than just have someone else do something for me. I just wanted to have you make me something neat of a collage deal of love. Nevermind.
Thank you.
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 28, 2005 12:03 PM
I thought your womb was a barren place? Which is it, Jesus lover!
Anyway, here's the gig. Under "about me" on your edit page, there is a code there. I put in the colors so you can check to see what is what, and change as you like. I know, you probably didn't want to do anytihng yourself, but I just don't have any idea what you would want. Anyway, you can use my photobucket account if you don't have one to source anything from, if you like. Just copy the URL from photobucket and paste in the code where right now the URL for "gummybears" is. The URL is in between the quotation marks. Be careful not to delete anything while pasting something new, obviously.
And of course you could just delete the URL and all the color names to put it back to normal while keeping the code there for use later.
Well, I'm going to go do something constructive. Like popsicles. Fudgicles!!
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 28, 2005 10:23 AM
My womb is a sacred place indeed. Christ has a VIP pass.... very important prophet. Ha. Fuck off.
That's my password. I have one other one that is random thing/number but shhhh... it's for security turtles.
Don't make one if you don't want to. If it comes to you, then do it. No big deal.
I don't know, whatever Doors song had come on the radio when i was typing that.
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 28, 2005 10:57 AM
"But, then of course, African Swallows are non-migratory."
heheheh, i love the Holy Grail. By which I mean, your womb. By which I mean, you are related to christ.
Is that really your password?? Is that what it's always been or did you just change it or something? Because that would be weird if both our passwords were randomthing6.
Well, you could go to tom's page, and then to mack's page, where is all you need to know, but I already have everything on my shit, so I can justr paste, and BLAH!
WHAT DO YOU WANT??? I mean, I have no idea, now that I'm thinking about it, what to put up! O well.
Hm which doors song? maybe it could mean something. I like alabama song
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 28, 2005 9:43 AM
Well, we have gone to the pub to drink together. I was hoping we were something more. Neeeer.
It's gonna cost me? What? I'll give you a bag of jelly beans... they're in the mail. Now give me cool backgroundness.
Password is:
trainspot6
What do you need that for? You're going to put it up for me? You sure are swell.
I could go for a BLT, but i could also go for... another BLT. Shit.
I just keep hearing the same Doors songs over and over again... not even the better ones.
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 28, 2005 9:26 AM
No!! I said... Barrel-friend..... It's an old english term meaning we drink at the pub together. Jenn!!! <3
Well I could work on a background for you but it's gonna cost you... oh and I'd need your password. heh, heh. I just remembered my ex GF's hotmail password. Too bad I don't get a kick out of reading other people's mail... even though THEY used to read this one girls mail all the time, like, the mails she was getting from this one guy but that were admittedly incredibly gay and funny....
Anyway, I just at two BLTs.
But, so, I'm at home now. WYWH
How do the doors piss you off?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 27, 2005 12:04 PM
Did you refer to me as your girlfriend?!?!?! Tyler!!!
Heh. :)
No, i didn't fart on him. It wasn't Aerosmith. And well, i didn't have to. I might have hurt myself if i had tried.
I wish i could have a cool background. But then again, i don't want to stand out or look interesting. I don't even know how to change my background because i'm so bland.
Ruff ruff.
I'm a puppy.
The Dorrs sometimes piss me off, too.
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 27, 2005 12:37 PM
some aerosmith song came on today and i was like good god damn and ran to turn it down real quick, and then a guy approached the counter and asked me how my day was going, and I told him pretty good except aerosmith just came on. And he was like man you really sound mad. and I'm like yeah they do this to me every day!! And then I was like, Yeah my girlfriend's dad is good buddies with them. Get's their pot for them whenever they're in new england. Yeah.
Did you do it, BTW?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 26, 2005 10:55 AM
People that look interesting? I bet that means chicks that look hot. Duh. You're a mess.
Anyway, some guy is playing the HARMO like some kind of thing on my radio. Untz.
You're never going to get off this piece because you love myspace girls. And because, well, you're not sleepy?
I had something else to tell you. I guess i'll just have to show you, instead. If i see you anytime soon.
If this song turns out to be something like Areosmith i'm going to fuckin kill. Alright, if it does, i'm going to go fart in the backroom right next to Richard and then walk away.
It just might be Aerosmith. Shit.
Shit.
Hooooo ah!
You love myspace.
~Aesop Rock~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 26, 2005 11:48 AM
I'm not shopping for girls, you heeb. I'm just looking at neat-looking people. Maybe talking with them about something. I think I found DJ Dara on here earlier, and wante to ask him a few questions, like, if he really is dara or a big jerk, but whoever he is has like 5000 friends so I figured it would never get through.
Usually I come to someone's profile through another friend of mine's. Sometimes I have good conversations! Gyad damn. I haven't replied to like a million emails already from girls I was talking to before. Except today I replied to one to tell her she should look into the photography scholarship up at UNA. I didn't tell her my mom was who she'd be working for, of course. But she seems talented and my mom needs someone up there. SO ZARK OFF, JEEZ!
Ok for rilly rills I'm outta here. Bye bananette~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 26, 2005 10:40 AM
I just keep telling people that it smell of poo there, constantly. They don't buy it, but thats okay, because i'm not really saying it. I think that old dude was like, "don't go there, you're lame." Shit, i made that up, too.
Yeah, i like the freewillastrology, thanks. I wish i had something to share with you in return. :(
Burping.
lights.
chill.
Seriously though, stop shopping for girls. It really bugs me. And it makes you scummy.
~eep~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 26, 2005 11:34 AM
Hah! Aren't you glad I turned you onto that Rob Brezny site?? Hm, yes... I believe we are failing in our anti alaska campaign. I haven't been saying things like, yeaahh.. yeah it does get pretty cold. Oh I dunno, I'm just looking for work I guess.
Instead I'm like, Oh yeah but you get used to it. Shit I just love it there it's awesome, you should go sometime.
I was doing pretty good a while, but, I dunno. I slacked. And it's starting to resurface.
Um....... I'm getting off line now. I'm going camping. In my room.
Talk to you, A.C. slater
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 26, 2005 10:24 AM
I am eating goldfish crackers. This is what keeps me chubby. I'm stocking up on softness for the winter. This is all i eat though, why am i not tiny?-
-
I just pierced my hand to represent the stigmata that my mind has gone through because of public television. Not really though. What a tard. Stop shopping for girls on myspace!!!! >:C
-
I wasn't asking you if you were ging to buy that backpack, i was just asking you if you wanted it. i could get it for you. Duh. -
-
Last night on the second airing of Jay Leno (the second one which happened to be a different episode than the first), he was interviewing this old dude and i wasn't paying attention. And then they said Alaska, so i payed attention because it was the third time last night that it was mentioned on my TV. So i listened up and this guy was like, almost 100, and was talking about he was with the first guy to fly over the north and sole poles. He was telling all kinds of cool stories, like taking the pope for a dog sled ride and what not. He says that on his 100th birthday, he's going to be on the top of some certain mountain and he's going to have his first drop of alcohol, a glass a champagne.
I'd advise you, dear Virgo to think of this kick ass old dude to be your hero in the coming weeks. Go to your girl and show her lots of love. You will be richly rewarded in crackers.
donkey.
~passenger seat penis~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 26, 2005 10:54 AM
I was in so hate with the world because I saw some chick on here with her hand pierced. And the idiocy of it struck me like a wave of black fire. I'm not uncultured. I'm down with anything that has purpose, significance, or symbolism. None of that applies here. It reminds me of everything that is wrong. It's pointless. Baseless. Utterly useless. Dysfunctional. Anyway, that was then.
yesyesyesyesy ok.
Mmmmm....
Hey the skyway bridge is on TV. I went over it a lot. Neat, I guess.
yeah there is your phone number but you're not there! Why do you give me useless information!! I'm just kidding. Thanks, I might forget it... oh wait, I've dialed it like 10 million times in the past 2 months and it is burned into my finger nerves. Actually, I was dialing my mom's ofice the other day from a cell phone and vefore I knew it I had dialed your house. Then I dialed the number here, and thought sky was at the office and was like "hgey you got that assignment done!?" and he was like what? and i wqas like is mom there? no. Oh, are you at home? yeah. Oh... I thought... nevermind, bye.
Dillusional. I know that one. Ah hah.
Yes, well I'll talk to you later about the bag or something. I Do want it, but.. I don't know if I can spend money on it yet... Or whatever. Anyway, the time bell hasn't struck yet for any of these things. Look further down the line of time.
Walnuts~~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 26, 2005 9:19 AM
Why ARE you so in hate with the world right now? Is it because you want out of the place you're in? Let's go! Snooook'ems. Ha!
Those look good. We should have those. But you are right, i am not a man. Do you want that guys one? I could buy it for you if it's going to kick more ass than the one that you have right now. Untz.
I should hit up the military surplus place in Milford. See what they have there. And find all kinds of neat stuff that i didn't know that i would need. ha! Impulsive shopping.... tastey. I need transportation.
There is a guy in here that looks like your dad. I was hoping that your dad had brought you here to see me. Ms. Delisional. I don't know how to spell delusional.
Here is the delivery confirmation/insurance number:
0703 8555 7491 2055 3029
Here is some other number that they gave me:
WEX1954920
Here is my phone number:
603-883-4825
Here is the number twelve:
12
Buggah boo.
~love~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 26, 2005 9:59 AM
OK! SIIIIIGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Here are some damn linx! RAR!!!!!!!!! Why AM I in so hate with the world right now!!?? Oh wait I KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!! GOD DAMNIT! poo.
anyway, here is the link to the place with the mac-daddy percentage off the scrillah tag:
http://www.sierratradingpost.com/xq/asp/base_no.85571/dept_id.L2~311/qx/product.htm
But it is MEN's! It's too big for you! You're not a mAN! You have a vagina, man! dude! You're a chick! What I'm saying is... I think I want this pack. But I'm looking for you one now.................
Here's a women's that is really nice and a good deal, but it's still a bit pricey. regular $350 marked down to 200.
http://www.sierratradingpost.com/xq/asp/base_no.85542/dept_id.L2~311/qx/product.htm
I dunno, that's all I can find. You should look around that site though. Really the only reason I'm saying that I'd like to get that one pack is because it seems really awesome and they only have men's, but if you think it won't be too big then you can try it. The only thing about it is that it's 3 years old, but, that doesn't neccesarily mean anything. I don't know how to spell necessarilly. Just look around. I'm getting tired.
Kitten love sauce
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 25, 2005 6:51 AM
Hey honey, you are not in Mississippi right now. Is it possible for you to type out Mississippi without spelling it out in your head? They made us spell it out so damn much in elementry school, i can't look at the damn name without spelling it out mentally. Damnit!
Anyway...
Carpenters are wonderful. I am a fan of carpentry. I don't know if you knew that. Jesus was a carpenter. Can you also be the next messiah... "honey, the world's next messiah is home..." Oh my goodness, i adore you. :) But yeah, be a carpenter, that's a good honest living. Real man's work.
What am i going to be? I should have taken that welding class, damnit. I wish i hadn't missed the sign ups. But i guess i don't have a car now anyway, so it doesn't matter. I'll have to find a class elsewhere and figure out the car situation. Roo.
The hair will figure itself out.
You'll have to show me how to sweet tea properly. I'm going to have to spend some time learnin how to feed you properly. I've gots to be a good woman.
Nah, i'm not that fat, i'm just hilariously tubby. i still think that hippypotomus is absolutely absurd though! HIPPYPOTOMUS!! HAHAHAHAHAH!!!
I have to be funny about it, so i don't get all sad. mrrr. It's okay though, let me get out of this place and it'll come off again.
My brain is sending you a signal. And maybe i'm sending you a package. I'm signaling your package. Ha!
I LOVE YOU!
mew. :)
.... bewbies. Ha!!!
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 23, 2005 7:33 PM
Hey honey, I'm in mississippi now. About to eat some veggie soup n' cornbread. I was just thinking about things... like, maybe joining the carpenter's union, to you know, learn a bit of carpentry, and then coming home with sawdust all over me and saying "hey honey!", when I get in the door. I dunno...
Oh you do whatever you want with your hair. They're just kind of unlovable, in that way no fingers go through them, and I don't really feel too comfortable scratching your head, because it clogs up my fingernails with scalp and grease.... But these are no big deal, really, and I would feel too awkward if you were considering taking them out because of me when you like them in. Yeah.
Ahhh, so the brooks did build onto the bank, then? That is pretty sneaky.
Hmmm..... well.. i have soup to be getting to...
Sweet tea is best when hot and melty on the ice... otherwise it's a little too strong and sweet. You see you make it for dinner, strong, so that after the ice melts, it is just right. The proportions I gave you to make with might be a little strong for your methods of usage.
You gotta quit talking about being fat, cuz then I think it's ok to joke around about, but I don't think that's exactly true, is it?
Well I have some soup to be getting to.... love, and etc. I wish I could call you in a minute... In fact I probably will somehow.
Love.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 22, 2005 2:07 PM
Honey suckle... it's "wicked pissah." "Pissah wicked" just doesn't make any sense! C'mon now! :)
I want my hair to get real long, too, that way i won't have to wear extensions. Well, you know i don't HAVE to wear them, but if i didn't have them in, i would do all kinds of other stuff to it and cut it a bunch, and shit, i want long hair, i've never really had it before. At least not since i was like, 10.
I'm pretty broke, too. But like i said before, i'm never going to be able to save up a substancial amount of money, so i might as well spend some of it now. And i just did. Went on an errand run for the past i dunno, hour or so, and i bet i spent like, 30 bucks. But at the same time, i have one less bill to be paying now.
So i just went to the bank to deposit my canadian money, as in go through exchange and put it in my account. So the woman just handed me like, fifteen bucks. God damnit. So i spent it. But most of it was for quarters for laundry. And i deposited my paycheck which was like, $300. But then i went to Brooks to buy some things. That store is sneaky, no wonder why they wanted to have a place right next to the bank, people deposit their paychecks and then go, "hey, i have to go grab some chapstick" and go in there to get chapstick, and then they look around going "hmm, i just deposited 300 bucks, i should buy some things i've been meaning to get since i'm rich now." Grrr. -$15
I cancelled my car insurance. Yay. They would be taking out like, 65 bucks on Monday, but now they wont, and i have saved money. +$65
But then i went next door to the Dynamyte place. There was a neon sign that said "express sushi." How god damn American. Almost made me turn around and go home. But instead, i went inside and ordered two orders of california rolls. i should have got one california roll and one cucumber roll. Both very very tastey. They have all kinds of neat things there, nice looking dinner specials. I'll take you there, it will be tastey. -$10
But, i walked it all, so at least i saved the dollar's worth of gas that i would have barely used.
i can't wait to not be fat anymore!!!! Woo -hoo!!!
Some woman was coming out of her apartment, probably like, number 25 or so, and she was started to walk twards the mailbox side of the place, and then she saw me walking twards her, and she turned around and went out the other way. What the fuck? Am i that scary looking?
I hope my sweet tea is completely chilly soon.
I have listened to "I am the ocean" about 3498758 times today. I swear to god i can do anything as long as that song is playing. I think i'll take over Russia.... damnit.
I've been dancing around in my underwear a whole bunch!!!! Wooo! I'm some kind of damned hippy. Hippypotomus!!! Ack! Ahahahahahah!!!!
Ah..... i'm fat. :)
Okay, next e-mail. :)
~juice~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 22, 2005 8:42 AM
Tomorrow became today! I'm super mega ultra pissah wicked broke! Wow, how pissah before wicked grates the nerves! I'm pissah wicked irked about it!
Honey, I agree with what you said before, let;s just not talk about it.
I'm thirsty and hungry sort of but mostly I want to talk to you on the phone but I can't. Hey here's an idea: steal comeones cellphone and call me on that!
I wish my hair ould get goddamned long already.
Well I'm going to cash my chek 2day and buy a ticket fpr eomthing and you know what else? i;'m tired of looking at the kerbowad wjhen i typoer./ fuck it man, i', fliing soplo on this onme. See, I', pretty gfoos huh?
i lkove you jenniger a ehjolwe whole lot! O eaighj that we we marttueird tohgether and we alreadyu old and abour to die. Wouldnt tyhat nbe hrand? I dont so myc weant to live with you as fie with you. AWWWWW nbi u;m jyst kiddinbg. My heart does geel rhgunbfgs though that m,yu brain wont let me say. it foes, " you dumb gool! be a man and hate thinks! I funno i'be jusdt been huty so bad befpre. and I dont kjisty meanb beyweenb ius, niy nefpre you too. and my ecpereunce says that i shouldnt let anyone get close to me, tou know? that it onlu reallu hurts. tyatrs its all bunkj and whatnot/ I think its finnuy tyhat i could spell whatnot wirhjout looking ao easilu. Shjows you what a snob i am. And whatnot. haj! whatnot! wjaynoe! doh! well, thats indian dor whatnot/
Donty be foen! I l;ove ypi!
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 21, 2005 9:13 AM
I just won't be in tomorrow. Period. Period face. You dropped your period. Ha!
I feel absolutely yucky. I'm wicked dizzy and painy in the belly. Like, cramp style. I'm going to say that i'm not pregnant, i'm just having the worst and longest pms in the world. Hopefully. It's possible. In fact, i'm going with that... it's much cheaper.
But shit, i feel like i'm going to pass out.
I love the "fill in for me, if you can fit." Very silly.
Best pants of 2005. Only i voted, at least that i know of. And the prize are the pants. You get to wear them. And now you can officially tell people that you have the best pants of 2005. Ha! It's official!
I don't feel down about you getting off the phone like that. That didn't bother me at all, in fact. You're at work, duh, and i didn't think it was anything personal. Like how i had to sign off of AIM because of the bossssssss.
I don't know why i'm down. Mostly it's my body, i feel like my soul is rejecting it. Yow. My heart feels heavy. My face feels sad, like it's pointing down. Damn, that gravity's got me down again. :(
smoooooooooch nuts.
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 21, 2005 8:50 AM
why don't you tell him now, say, "I'm not coming in tomorrow because it would be pointless since I have nothing to do, unless you want to pay me to sit around all day, and even if you do, that's not my job. I'm sure you'd love to fill in for me tomorrow? If you can fit, fatass."
Ah, yes, I have to check that whoroscope.
Yay!! Best pants 2005!! Who all voted??? What do I win??
Only people like goober spell congratulations like congradulations.
I fear...... fear. the most. But, something substantial, I'd have to say... worms crawling out of my face while burning razored whips slash me and flames lick my skin and everywhere i look, hellish demon faces bite my eyes and i breath in fire and ice and i'm drowning but never stop and my muscles feel like they want to snap but are cramped up and my stomach is turning inside out but it feels sagged with lead poisoned weights and whenever i call for help it is strangled and molested by fear, and my throat becomes torn, and every feeble attempt at sanity and last glimpse as it dissapears forever brings new and more profound horrors forever and ever..
Do you feel down because I got off the phone with you so quickly? Probably not.... but... anyway, I thought ruth had come in, and I'm not supposed to be talking on the phone, in case you were wondering.
Why do you feel bad?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 21, 2005 7:28 AM
Wow, i've had like, 12 hours of work so far this week. Norma just checked all my stuff in and i barely have anything to do today. I'm not going to come in tomorrow and Jerry's going to give me shit for it, though i have nothing to do.
I'm so super sleepy. And wired. I feel ultra high and fucked up. It's like my body and my frontal lobe's are drunk, but my speak is not.
I wish i have like, my own private bathroom at all times. No matter where i went. There's the utopia.
I like horoscopes.
Tyler, you have been voted Best Pants - 2005. Congratulations. I hate it when people spell it "congradulations."
I wish we could go to the winter beach when you get here. But it'll be crap-people-advertised beach that takes forever to get to soon. Or maybe it is now.
Holy high five nigger face!
What do you fear most?
Why does it feel like i feel down emotionally this past hour?
I'm deleting it with my brain. And using my belly guts to push it out. Untz.
~your father~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 21, 2005 8:23 AM
damn you sure love that mouse... or you're not very adept at this "computer" business. with your, "hands".
"face"
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 21, 2005 7:17 AM
Both my hands are on my mouse.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 21, 2005 8:15 AM
ONE hand is. you do still have two hands right?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 21, 2005 7:13 AM
My hand is on my mouse.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 21, 2005 8:12 AM
my hand is on my junk
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 20, 2005 6:47 AM
I "heart" you.
~organ grinder~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 19, 2005 5:04 PM
voleolvoelvoleolvovloloelvolvoelolvolevoleovlovleololoevlolvoelloveloveloveovloevovelovloevloevloevloevlovloevloevloevloevloevloevlovelolovelovelovelovelovelov
THATS RIGHT, LEO LOVE!!!
i mean lvespolvppesolcvpoliecspvolspecoilpcvpoiplsiecpoilcvslopeiclpvesoieocvlposvilcposeicoilvpoecivolposvilppiscesplove
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 19, 2005 9:54 AM
Good luck in court today. Had i already said that to you this morning? i don't think so, and i don't know why. But good luck. Don't go to jail or anything. And uh....
I lurrrrrrrrrve you. Lurrrrrrrrve is like love, but has to do with an exchange of larve. You'll understand when you are older.
I also love you. :) Shut up.
~jenifer~
-
That is funny about your knife, but i'll just talk to you about that later on today in real life... outside of planet myspace... planet ourspace... planet sourface. Yow!-
-
All your eathereal pennies are belong to my bear pod. -
-
shit fuck hell damn. i feel swell. :)
-
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: May 11, 2005 1:07 PM
Well, frank I don't liek your mom at all. And you can tell her I said so. Or I'll tell her to her face, I aint no pussie. Bleh.
I'm over at the nashua library. Apparently after all the bullshit I went through with them taking my knife from me in columbus, and me trying to get it sent here but then sending it to manchester because it would cost more for some stupid reason, apparently none of that meant anything because it got sent to nachua afterall. dumbasses. Fucking retarded. But anyway, I have my knife back.
So you were going to stick a lime on my face, were you?
What happened, turn yellow? A yellow chicken liver? Yum! Speaking fo which I just went through the neighborhood where the mexican boxer's wife made me that dinner with chicken livers in it. Egads. Key blimey pie. Mhh, key lime pie... Thats what we could do with all your limes! But they're not key limes... O well, fuck you.
love.
Well save your ethereal pennies because ethereal pennies make ethereal dollars make ethereal richness. Just don't spend them at all except on necessities like ethereal cars and ethereal houses. Ethereal food and clothing. Ethereal etc.
Ethereal peace out
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 29, 2005 9:49 AM
Well, i have a moustache... how do i turn that into a moo-stash? Do i need milk? And lucky me, i happen to already be wearing spikes and leather pants. Wow, this might be easier than i thought. Who wasn't trying?!?!? It wasn't me, i'm sure. No, i want doritos... doritos with some kind of soda that has lime in it.
I think i'll put a little slice of lime on your face. Good god would that be fantastic.
The talk wasn't about you guys not getting along, it was more of a "this is what i think is wrong with you guys and your relationship from what i have seen and assumed from the lessons of my own life" vs. the "you have only seen us together at your house, with nothing to do but wait for some grub. Try climbing a tree with him and see how that goes." Very un0interesting. Very typical. How boring. I'm sorry.
I waste my ethereal pennies on all kinds of things! Mostly everything that doesn't connect or have flow, hence the currency and it's rapage known as pennies. But everything does serve it's purpose, so i guess those things that i do for people have theirs, but sometimes i just feel like i'm missing something. I know now that it's not my fault though. Way to be the outcast. Or the Outkast.
Yee. :)
~bizarro nuts, i mean, face~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 29, 2005 10:25 AM
Well, if you want to write an un-gay email, first you grow a moo-stash. Then you dress yourself in spikes and ultra-tuff leather pants and vest(s). THEN you only write your emails after working out vigorously, and showering afterwards with, your fellow moo-stash wearing spike totin' heterophobes.
A prophet of prophets!? Oh you told me about that once. Well... bah. A blarg on both your houses! I'm just kidding, le sigh, wouldn't want to be usin' my prophecyin skillz for the negative.
So you had a chat with my mom about why I didn't get along with her so swell?? Just tell her I have LD and ADD and I hate my own mother besides, and I'm sure she'll understand, and at least believe that she does. But seriously, I think she's alright, I just don't get along with people at first, unless they're really cool, and that is rare. Like the way I like my meat; in your hair. Like the way I comb my face; through the air. Like the way my meat is kept; unaware. Like the way I pound the street; over there.
Like the way I lick my sauce; from afar. Like the way I dig lip gloss; with a car. Like the way I chain my beast; in the tar. Like the way I have my feast; in a jar.
What are you wasting your ethereal pennies on, dear?
Your the greatest. Your the best thing going on in my life. Your the only thing that makes me really happy. It's true, your.
Yes, no more junk food. Only real fried fats and PIE. Cut out the middle man. Or... possibly add some onto your middle... non-teehee.
Grommet shanebows and fart vitamins!!!!!!!????????*
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 28, 2005 1:23 PM
Okay, my emails are gay. Sorry. Teach me of your wonderous ways my master.
I told my mom you were a prophet of prophets.
I also told her that she and her house are not fun. She said her house was not built for children. And that she admits that she is serious. I then informed her that it is not that she is serious, it is that she is no fun. Full circle.
I am sad because sometimes i get to worried that i can't do enough for others. It kills me. It makes me feel guilty for wasting time, space, universal mental pennies.
No more cheeze its for me.
No more junk food like that, it makes me feel ick, i decided that yesterday.
I want to vomit rainbows!!!!!!!
And rain vombows!!!!!
Bane vows.
Tame cows.
I love it when you use "you're" for "you are" and not "your."
~penis~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 28, 2005 2:16 PM
Well did you see the real one!? WTF! No appreciation.
Oh right, corn dog. I g2g.
Van morrison loves you, though. Why are you sad? Should I call? Are you out of cheezits??
OUR emails aren't gay. YOURS are.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 28, 2005 12:57 PM
I know, i was just playing.
That's right, burn the pizza, protest! Stab in the cafeteria and stab them with your plastic forks! It's the revolution!!! Oh, i mean, uh, eat all the junk food while you can now, there ain't much up here.
I love Van Morrison. Though right now it makes me want to cry. But it's real enjoyable music. Oh whoaaaa, domino. :(
Hugging is good.
Wow, our emails are real gay, let's not ever let anyone see them. Poof.
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 28, 2005 1:49 PM
oh come on, now.... it's just your myspace page... oh wait. Oh fuck I'm so sorry, what was I thinking??
Well its time for.... fuck, i already burned one pizza making your damn background and i almost burnt two corn dogs just now. O well it's ok. Cuz when I get there, we're going to... I don't know, EAT LOTS OF GOOD FOOD! and hug. I'm sorry.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 28, 2005 11:26 AM
Alright, wonderful. My page is a fucking mess. Oh well. And uh, well, i do prefer to be shown how to do something, rather than just have someone else do something for me. I just wanted to have you make me something neat of a collage deal of love. Nevermind.
Thank you.
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 28, 2005 12:03 PM
I thought your womb was a barren place? Which is it, Jesus lover!
Anyway, here's the gig. Under "about me" on your edit page, there is a code there. I put in the colors so you can check to see what is what, and change as you like. I know, you probably didn't want to do anytihng yourself, but I just don't have any idea what you would want. Anyway, you can use my photobucket account if you don't have one to source anything from, if you like. Just copy the URL from photobucket and paste in the code where right now the URL for "gummybears" is. The URL is in between the quotation marks. Be careful not to delete anything while pasting something new, obviously.
And of course you could just delete the URL and all the color names to put it back to normal while keeping the code there for use later.
Well, I'm going to go do something constructive. Like popsicles. Fudgicles!!
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 28, 2005 10:23 AM
My womb is a sacred place indeed. Christ has a VIP pass.... very important prophet. Ha. Fuck off.
That's my password. I have one other one that is random thing/number but shhhh... it's for security turtles.
Don't make one if you don't want to. If it comes to you, then do it. No big deal.
I don't know, whatever Doors song had come on the radio when i was typing that.
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 28, 2005 10:57 AM
"But, then of course, African Swallows are non-migratory."
heheheh, i love the Holy Grail. By which I mean, your womb. By which I mean, you are related to christ.
Is that really your password?? Is that what it's always been or did you just change it or something? Because that would be weird if both our passwords were randomthing6.
Well, you could go to tom's page, and then to mack's page, where is all you need to know, but I already have everything on my shit, so I can justr paste, and BLAH!
WHAT DO YOU WANT??? I mean, I have no idea, now that I'm thinking about it, what to put up! O well.
Hm which doors song? maybe it could mean something. I like alabama song
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 28, 2005 9:43 AM
Well, we have gone to the pub to drink together. I was hoping we were something more. Neeeer.
It's gonna cost me? What? I'll give you a bag of jelly beans... they're in the mail. Now give me cool backgroundness.
Password is:
trainspot6
What do you need that for? You're going to put it up for me? You sure are swell.
I could go for a BLT, but i could also go for... another BLT. Shit.
I just keep hearing the same Doors songs over and over again... not even the better ones.
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 28, 2005 9:26 AM
No!! I said... Barrel-friend..... It's an old english term meaning we drink at the pub together. Jenn!!! <3
Well I could work on a background for you but it's gonna cost you... oh and I'd need your password. heh, heh. I just remembered my ex GF's hotmail password. Too bad I don't get a kick out of reading other people's mail... even though THEY used to read this one girls mail all the time, like, the mails she was getting from this one guy but that were admittedly incredibly gay and funny....
Anyway, I just at two BLTs.
But, so, I'm at home now. WYWH
How do the doors piss you off?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 27, 2005 12:04 PM
Did you refer to me as your girlfriend?!?!?! Tyler!!!
Heh. :)
No, i didn't fart on him. It wasn't Aerosmith. And well, i didn't have to. I might have hurt myself if i had tried.
I wish i could have a cool background. But then again, i don't want to stand out or look interesting. I don't even know how to change my background because i'm so bland.
Ruff ruff.
I'm a puppy.
The Dorrs sometimes piss me off, too.
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: futon_junkie
Date: Apr 27, 2005 12:37 PM
some aerosmith song came on today and i was like good god damn and ran to turn it down real quick, and then a guy approached the counter and asked me how my day was going, and I told him pretty good except aerosmith just came on. And he was like man you really sound mad. and I'm like yeah they do this to me every day!! And then I was like, Yeah my girlfriend's dad is good buddies with them. Get's their pot for them whenever they're in new england. Yeah.
Did you do it, BTW?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 26, 2005 10:55 AM
People that look interesting? I bet that means chicks that look hot. Duh. You're a mess.
Anyway, some guy is playing the HARMO like some kind of thing on my radio. Untz.
You're never going to get off this piece because you love myspace girls. And because, well, you're not sleepy?
I had something else to tell you. I guess i'll just have to show you, instead. If i see you anytime soon.
If this song turns out to be something like Areosmith i'm going to fuckin kill. Alright, if it does, i'm going to go fart in the backroom right next to Richard and then walk away.
It just might be Aerosmith. Shit.
Shit.
Hooooo ah!
You love myspace.
~Aesop Rock~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 26, 2005 11:48 AM
I'm not shopping for girls, you heeb. I'm just looking at neat-looking people. Maybe talking with them about something. I think I found DJ Dara on here earlier, and wante to ask him a few questions, like, if he really is dara or a big jerk, but whoever he is has like 5000 friends so I figured it would never get through.
Usually I come to someone's profile through another friend of mine's. Sometimes I have good conversations! Gyad damn. I haven't replied to like a million emails already from girls I was talking to before. Except today I replied to one to tell her she should look into the photography scholarship up at UNA. I didn't tell her my mom was who she'd be working for, of course. But she seems talented and my mom needs someone up there. SO ZARK OFF, JEEZ!
Ok for rilly rills I'm outta here. Bye bananette~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 26, 2005 10:40 AM
I just keep telling people that it smell of poo there, constantly. They don't buy it, but thats okay, because i'm not really saying it. I think that old dude was like, "don't go there, you're lame." Shit, i made that up, too.
Yeah, i like the freewillastrology, thanks. I wish i had something to share with you in return. :(
Burping.
lights.
chill.
Seriously though, stop shopping for girls. It really bugs me. And it makes you scummy.
~eep~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 26, 2005 11:34 AM
Hah! Aren't you glad I turned you onto that Rob Brezny site?? Hm, yes... I believe we are failing in our anti alaska campaign. I haven't been saying things like, yeaahh.. yeah it does get pretty cold. Oh I dunno, I'm just looking for work I guess.
Instead I'm like, Oh yeah but you get used to it. Shit I just love it there it's awesome, you should go sometime.
I was doing pretty good a while, but, I dunno. I slacked. And it's starting to resurface.
Um....... I'm getting off line now. I'm going camping. In my room.
Talk to you, A.C. slater
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 26, 2005 10:24 AM
I am eating goldfish crackers. This is what keeps me chubby. I'm stocking up on softness for the winter. This is all i eat though, why am i not tiny?-
-
I just pierced my hand to represent the stigmata that my mind has gone through because of public television. Not really though. What a tard. Stop shopping for girls on myspace!!!! >:C
-
I wasn't asking you if you were ging to buy that backpack, i was just asking you if you wanted it. i could get it for you. Duh. -
-
Last night on the second airing of Jay Leno (the second one which happened to be a different episode than the first), he was interviewing this old dude and i wasn't paying attention. And then they said Alaska, so i payed attention because it was the third time last night that it was mentioned on my TV. So i listened up and this guy was like, almost 100, and was talking about he was with the first guy to fly over the north and sole poles. He was telling all kinds of cool stories, like taking the pope for a dog sled ride and what not. He says that on his 100th birthday, he's going to be on the top of some certain mountain and he's going to have his first drop of alcohol, a glass a champagne.
I'd advise you, dear Virgo to think of this kick ass old dude to be your hero in the coming weeks. Go to your girl and show her lots of love. You will be richly rewarded in crackers.
donkey.
~passenger seat penis~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 26, 2005 10:54 AM
I was in so hate with the world because I saw some chick on here with her hand pierced. And the idiocy of it struck me like a wave of black fire. I'm not uncultured. I'm down with anything that has purpose, significance, or symbolism. None of that applies here. It reminds me of everything that is wrong. It's pointless. Baseless. Utterly useless. Dysfunctional. Anyway, that was then.
yesyesyesyesy ok.
Mmmmm....
Hey the skyway bridge is on TV. I went over it a lot. Neat, I guess.
yeah there is your phone number but you're not there! Why do you give me useless information!! I'm just kidding. Thanks, I might forget it... oh wait, I've dialed it like 10 million times in the past 2 months and it is burned into my finger nerves. Actually, I was dialing my mom's ofice the other day from a cell phone and vefore I knew it I had dialed your house. Then I dialed the number here, and thought sky was at the office and was like "hgey you got that assignment done!?" and he was like what? and i wqas like is mom there? no. Oh, are you at home? yeah. Oh... I thought... nevermind, bye.
Dillusional. I know that one. Ah hah.
Yes, well I'll talk to you later about the bag or something. I Do want it, but.. I don't know if I can spend money on it yet... Or whatever. Anyway, the time bell hasn't struck yet for any of these things. Look further down the line of time.
Walnuts~~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 26, 2005 9:19 AM
Why ARE you so in hate with the world right now? Is it because you want out of the place you're in? Let's go! Snooook'ems. Ha!
Those look good. We should have those. But you are right, i am not a man. Do you want that guys one? I could buy it for you if it's going to kick more ass than the one that you have right now. Untz.
I should hit up the military surplus place in Milford. See what they have there. And find all kinds of neat stuff that i didn't know that i would need. ha! Impulsive shopping.... tastey. I need transportation.
There is a guy in here that looks like your dad. I was hoping that your dad had brought you here to see me. Ms. Delisional. I don't know how to spell delusional.
Here is the delivery confirmation/insurance number:
0703 8555 7491 2055 3029
Here is some other number that they gave me:
WEX1954920
Here is my phone number:
603-883-4825
Here is the number twelve:
12
Buggah boo.
~love~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 26, 2005 9:59 AM
OK! SIIIIIGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Here are some damn linx! RAR!!!!!!!!! Why AM I in so hate with the world right now!!?? Oh wait I KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!! GOD DAMNIT! poo.
anyway, here is the link to the place with the mac-daddy percentage off the scrillah tag:
http://www.sierratradingpost.com/xq/asp/base_no.85571/dept_id.L2~311/qx/product.htm
But it is MEN's! It's too big for you! You're not a mAN! You have a vagina, man! dude! You're a chick! What I'm saying is... I think I want this pack. But I'm looking for you one now.................
Here's a women's that is really nice and a good deal, but it's still a bit pricey. regular $350 marked down to 200.
http://www.sierratradingpost.com/xq/asp/base_no.85542/dept_id.L2~311/qx/product.htm
I dunno, that's all I can find. You should look around that site though. Really the only reason I'm saying that I'd like to get that one pack is because it seems really awesome and they only have men's, but if you think it won't be too big then you can try it. The only thing about it is that it's 3 years old, but, that doesn't neccesarily mean anything. I don't know how to spell necessarilly. Just look around. I'm getting tired.
Kitten love sauce
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 25, 2005 6:51 AM
Hey honey, you are not in Mississippi right now. Is it possible for you to type out Mississippi without spelling it out in your head? They made us spell it out so damn much in elementry school, i can't look at the damn name without spelling it out mentally. Damnit!
Anyway...
Carpenters are wonderful. I am a fan of carpentry. I don't know if you knew that. Jesus was a carpenter. Can you also be the next messiah... "honey, the world's next messiah is home..." Oh my goodness, i adore you. :) But yeah, be a carpenter, that's a good honest living. Real man's work.
What am i going to be? I should have taken that welding class, damnit. I wish i hadn't missed the sign ups. But i guess i don't have a car now anyway, so it doesn't matter. I'll have to find a class elsewhere and figure out the car situation. Roo.
The hair will figure itself out.
You'll have to show me how to sweet tea properly. I'm going to have to spend some time learnin how to feed you properly. I've gots to be a good woman.
Nah, i'm not that fat, i'm just hilariously tubby. i still think that hippypotomus is absolutely absurd though! HIPPYPOTOMUS!! HAHAHAHAHAH!!!
I have to be funny about it, so i don't get all sad. mrrr. It's okay though, let me get out of this place and it'll come off again.
My brain is sending you a signal. And maybe i'm sending you a package. I'm signaling your package. Ha!
I LOVE YOU!
mew. :)
.... bewbies. Ha!!!
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 23, 2005 7:33 PM
Hey honey, I'm in mississippi now. About to eat some veggie soup n' cornbread. I was just thinking about things... like, maybe joining the carpenter's union, to you know, learn a bit of carpentry, and then coming home with sawdust all over me and saying "hey honey!", when I get in the door. I dunno...
Oh you do whatever you want with your hair. They're just kind of unlovable, in that way no fingers go through them, and I don't really feel too comfortable scratching your head, because it clogs up my fingernails with scalp and grease.... But these are no big deal, really, and I would feel too awkward if you were considering taking them out because of me when you like them in. Yeah.
Ahhh, so the brooks did build onto the bank, then? That is pretty sneaky.
Hmmm..... well.. i have soup to be getting to...
Sweet tea is best when hot and melty on the ice... otherwise it's a little too strong and sweet. You see you make it for dinner, strong, so that after the ice melts, it is just right. The proportions I gave you to make with might be a little strong for your methods of usage.
You gotta quit talking about being fat, cuz then I think it's ok to joke around about, but I don't think that's exactly true, is it?
Well I have some soup to be getting to.... love, and etc. I wish I could call you in a minute... In fact I probably will somehow.
Love.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 22, 2005 2:07 PM
Honey suckle... it's "wicked pissah." "Pissah wicked" just doesn't make any sense! C'mon now! :)
I want my hair to get real long, too, that way i won't have to wear extensions. Well, you know i don't HAVE to wear them, but if i didn't have them in, i would do all kinds of other stuff to it and cut it a bunch, and shit, i want long hair, i've never really had it before. At least not since i was like, 10.
I'm pretty broke, too. But like i said before, i'm never going to be able to save up a substancial amount of money, so i might as well spend some of it now. And i just did. Went on an errand run for the past i dunno, hour or so, and i bet i spent like, 30 bucks. But at the same time, i have one less bill to be paying now.
So i just went to the bank to deposit my canadian money, as in go through exchange and put it in my account. So the woman just handed me like, fifteen bucks. God damnit. So i spent it. But most of it was for quarters for laundry. And i deposited my paycheck which was like, $300. But then i went to Brooks to buy some things. That store is sneaky, no wonder why they wanted to have a place right next to the bank, people deposit their paychecks and then go, "hey, i have to go grab some chapstick" and go in there to get chapstick, and then they look around going "hmm, i just deposited 300 bucks, i should buy some things i've been meaning to get since i'm rich now." Grrr. -$15
I cancelled my car insurance. Yay. They would be taking out like, 65 bucks on Monday, but now they wont, and i have saved money. +$65
But then i went next door to the Dynamyte place. There was a neon sign that said "express sushi." How god damn American. Almost made me turn around and go home. But instead, i went inside and ordered two orders of california rolls. i should have got one california roll and one cucumber roll. Both very very tastey. They have all kinds of neat things there, nice looking dinner specials. I'll take you there, it will be tastey. -$10
But, i walked it all, so at least i saved the dollar's worth of gas that i would have barely used.
i can't wait to not be fat anymore!!!! Woo -hoo!!!
Some woman was coming out of her apartment, probably like, number 25 or so, and she was started to walk twards the mailbox side of the place, and then she saw me walking twards her, and she turned around and went out the other way. What the fuck? Am i that scary looking?
I hope my sweet tea is completely chilly soon.
I have listened to "I am the ocean" about 3498758 times today. I swear to god i can do anything as long as that song is playing. I think i'll take over Russia.... damnit.
I've been dancing around in my underwear a whole bunch!!!! Wooo! I'm some kind of damned hippy. Hippypotomus!!! Ack! Ahahahahahah!!!!
Ah..... i'm fat. :)
Okay, next e-mail. :)
~juice~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 22, 2005 8:42 AM
Tomorrow became today! I'm super mega ultra pissah wicked broke! Wow, how pissah before wicked grates the nerves! I'm pissah wicked irked about it!
Honey, I agree with what you said before, let;s just not talk about it.
I'm thirsty and hungry sort of but mostly I want to talk to you on the phone but I can't. Hey here's an idea: steal comeones cellphone and call me on that!
I wish my hair ould get goddamned long already.
Well I'm going to cash my chek 2day and buy a ticket fpr eomthing and you know what else? i;'m tired of looking at the kerbowad wjhen i typoer./ fuck it man, i', fliing soplo on this onme. See, I', pretty gfoos huh?
i lkove you jenniger a ehjolwe whole lot! O eaighj that we we marttueird tohgether and we alreadyu old and abour to die. Wouldnt tyhat nbe hrand? I dont so myc weant to live with you as fie with you. AWWWWW nbi u;m jyst kiddinbg. My heart does geel rhgunbfgs though that m,yu brain wont let me say. it foes, " you dumb gool! be a man and hate thinks! I funno i'be jusdt been huty so bad befpre. and I dont kjisty meanb beyweenb ius, niy nefpre you too. and my ecpereunce says that i shouldnt let anyone get close to me, tou know? that it onlu reallu hurts. tyatrs its all bunkj and whatnot/ I think its finnuy tyhat i could spell whatnot wirhjout looking ao easilu. Shjows you what a snob i am. And whatnot. haj! whatnot! wjaynoe! doh! well, thats indian dor whatnot/
Donty be foen! I l;ove ypi!
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 21, 2005 9:13 AM
I just won't be in tomorrow. Period. Period face. You dropped your period. Ha!
I feel absolutely yucky. I'm wicked dizzy and painy in the belly. Like, cramp style. I'm going to say that i'm not pregnant, i'm just having the worst and longest pms in the world. Hopefully. It's possible. In fact, i'm going with that... it's much cheaper.
But shit, i feel like i'm going to pass out.
I love the "fill in for me, if you can fit." Very silly.
Best pants of 2005. Only i voted, at least that i know of. And the prize are the pants. You get to wear them. And now you can officially tell people that you have the best pants of 2005. Ha! It's official!
I don't feel down about you getting off the phone like that. That didn't bother me at all, in fact. You're at work, duh, and i didn't think it was anything personal. Like how i had to sign off of AIM because of the bossssssss.
I don't know why i'm down. Mostly it's my body, i feel like my soul is rejecting it. Yow. My heart feels heavy. My face feels sad, like it's pointing down. Damn, that gravity's got me down again. :(
smoooooooooch nuts.
~jenifer~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 21, 2005 8:50 AM
why don't you tell him now, say, "I'm not coming in tomorrow because it would be pointless since I have nothing to do, unless you want to pay me to sit around all day, and even if you do, that's not my job. I'm sure you'd love to fill in for me tomorrow? If you can fit, fatass."
Ah, yes, I have to check that whoroscope.
Yay!! Best pants 2005!! Who all voted??? What do I win??
Only people like goober spell congratulations like congradulations.
I fear...... fear. the most. But, something substantial, I'd have to say... worms crawling out of my face while burning razored whips slash me and flames lick my skin and everywhere i look, hellish demon faces bite my eyes and i breath in fire and ice and i'm drowning but never stop and my muscles feel like they want to snap but are cramped up and my stomach is turning inside out but it feels sagged with lead poisoned weights and whenever i call for help it is strangled and molested by fear, and my throat becomes torn, and every feeble attempt at sanity and last glimpse as it dissapears forever brings new and more profound horrors forever and ever..
Do you feel down because I got off the phone with you so quickly? Probably not.... but... anyway, I thought ruth had come in, and I'm not supposed to be talking on the phone, in case you were wondering.
Why do you feel bad?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 21, 2005 7:28 AM
Wow, i've had like, 12 hours of work so far this week. Norma just checked all my stuff in and i barely have anything to do today. I'm not going to come in tomorrow and Jerry's going to give me shit for it, though i have nothing to do.
I'm so super sleepy. And wired. I feel ultra high and fucked up. It's like my body and my frontal lobe's are drunk, but my speak is not.
I wish i have like, my own private bathroom at all times. No matter where i went. There's the utopia.
I like horoscopes.
Tyler, you have been voted Best Pants - 2005. Congratulations. I hate it when people spell it "congradulations."
I wish we could go to the winter beach when you get here. But it'll be crap-people-advertised beach that takes forever to get to soon. Or maybe it is now.
Holy high five nigger face!
What do you fear most?
Why does it feel like i feel down emotionally this past hour?
I'm deleting it with my brain. And using my belly guts to push it out. Untz.
~your father~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 21, 2005 8:23 AM
damn you sure love that mouse... or you're not very adept at this "computer" business. with your, "hands".
"face"
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 21, 2005 7:17 AM
Both my hands are on my mouse.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 21, 2005 8:15 AM
ONE hand is. you do still have two hands right?
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 21, 2005 7:13 AM
My hand is on my mouse.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 21, 2005 8:12 AM
my hand is on my junk
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 20, 2005 6:47 AM
I "heart" you.
~organ grinder~
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Another Hot Dog Monday
Date: Apr 19, 2005 5:04 PM
voleolvoelvoleolvovloloelvolvoelolvolevoleovlovleololoevlolvoelloveloveloveovloevovelovloevloevloevloevlovloevloevloevloevloevloevlovelolovelovelovelovelovelov
THATS RIGHT, LEO LOVE!!!
i mean lvespolvppesolcvpoliecspvolspecoilpcvpoiplsiecpoilcvslopeiclpvesoieocvlposvilcposeicoilvpoecivolposvilppiscesplove
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Jenifer
Date: Apr 19, 2005 9:54 AM
Good luck in court today. Had i already said that to you this morning? i don't think so, and i don't know why. But good luck. Don't go to jail or anything. And uh....
I lurrrrrrrrrve you. Lurrrrrrrrve is like love, but has to do with an exchange of larve. You'll understand when you are older.
I also love you. :) Shut up.
~jenifer~