[Cue Jaws theme. Well, no, not really literally. But perhaps a bit figuratively. There has been something a bit off today. And a bit off in the funny farm known as the Dressing Room never bodes well does it? No, no of course not. But you'll have the feeling of being watched. Turn to catch the source and -ah, no, just a potted plant in that
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Not really...
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Then how about a favor for a favor? You help me cross a name off of this list, and I will help you in whatever task you were scurrying off to do. [As a quick disclaimer:] As long as it does not involve harm to me, my dashingly handsome alterselves, or anyone I wish to affiliate with in the future. [And no substitutions, exceptions or refunds.]
Have we got a deal?
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Wasn't scurrying to do anything, though. Seems a bit unfair.
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[And already flipping toward the Tyki section of his little scavenger's list. What would suit this particular hobo? Hmmm hmmm. Hit by a train? Oh no no no. He seems much too on the move for that. Beat Allen at cards? Ha! As if.]
I could write a raincheck if you'd find that a better arrangement.
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[But anyway, right! The list! Tyki will see lines and lines of text meant to describe the various residents (past, present, future, and OH HELL NO NOT IN MY DR) of the Dressing Room. The lovely little descriptors closest too him are:
__ Tyki with blond hair
__ Tyki that magically creates babies out of thin hair
]
All I need is a signature, boss. And it's not like I have any magic voodoo powers to somehow use it against you.
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[ZOMG Tyki! This here be a Dressing Room noob. No one has even explained the tea to him yet. The management just dumped this paperwork on him upon arrival. Quite literally. SOB. Why him, you ask? Probably because the Dressing Room got tired of waiting for someone from the Science Division to show up.]
[Though that is a very very good question. What would he do with a Tyki soul? Play hackey sack with it? Juggle them if he caught a couple more?]
Now you're just being ridiculous. Do you know how much thousands of souls weigh? And how many carts I would have to get to haul them around? No thank you. Too much work for me.
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[Maybe he could sell it as a paperweight.]
Really. Here I always thought of them as being all floaty. Or nonexistent.
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You've been listening to too many wives' tales, my good Tyki. But if you'll just sign on this dotted line right here--
[Here, Tyki. Have an extreme close-up look at his laundry list. Sign it~ You know you want to.]
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But none of these are me...
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