Take me back to a time before the betrayal and death.
Music is only dangerous when negative moments/memories are attach to them. Here I was looking at industrial music and certain attachments came back to me. Memories I try to repress now to enjoy certain songs again, it's like shooting my foot for fun. I think back to Mike and J(not even going to bother with her name). It's been 6-7 years since I lost Mike and I still feel it til this day, I miss him like a motherfucker and would kill someone to bring him back. And as for J, well I wish she would of fucking died instead of him even though secretly I miss her as well. Maybe I'm just still hurt enough to wish suffering to her for turning her back against me after I tried to help her.
Sometimes I wish I should let her get addicted to that bullshit if I knew she was going to be traitor one day. One thing I forget to mention to people who want to become hermit like, is the fact when you do isolate yourself. That value time of getting to know someone you love or care about is gone. Some are lucky to be hermit by choice but for me it's never been about choice. Most of the time I'm left alone wanting to socialize when there's no one around and it sucks knowing this. I do get sick of society to the point where I have to shoot something to numb their existence from me. Being different has it's pains for the sheep will shun.
It seems to be coming back to me, the time where I used to wear all black with my big chain and boots sticking out like a sore thumb from the plain stereotype generic crowd. I do miss that side of me the whole "rebellious" phrase. Company just came over so I'm going to have to end this now. Later
Sometimes I wish I should let her get addicted to that bullshit if I knew she was going to be traitor one day. One thing I forget to mention to people who want to become hermit like, is the fact when you do isolate yourself. That value time of getting to know someone you love or care about is gone. Some are lucky to be hermit by choice but for me it's never been about choice. Most of the time I'm left alone wanting to socialize when there's no one around and it sucks knowing this. I do get sick of society to the point where I have to shoot something to numb their existence from me. Being different has it's pains for the sheep will shun.
It seems to be coming back to me, the time where I used to wear all black with my big chain and boots sticking out like a sore thumb from the plain stereotype generic crowd. I do miss that side of me the whole "rebellious" phrase. Company just came over so I'm going to have to end this now. Later