In the beginning...
So, I don't know where to start, but I've gotta start somewhere. This may ramble a bit. If I feel up to it, I'll try to organize it more later.
My Aunt Loretta and I used to have a very close relationship. She was the closest thing I ever had to a babysitter, since I never regularly needed supervision or anything like that. We'd spend occasional weekends together, going places, or just hanging out and listening to music, or me entertaining myself while she did homework or whatever.
Once, maybe twice, I recall we played with Barbies. I don't recall anything about it other than that. I remember enjoying the experience. Eventually, the age difference separated us as she moved on to college, and I was given an increasing workload in junior high and high school.
In grade school, I didn't really have any male friends. The boys were rough, mean, and very physical. I did not like sports, did not like fighting, and certainly did not like to deal with the somewhat immature manner in which they conducted themselves. As a result, I didn't have too many "friends" at all during this time period. A couple of acquaintances sure...but nobody who was a true honest friend.
My first real friend was Patrick. Pat was/is a very intelligent individual with a passion for life, and was generally soft spoken. I found him one day sitting out in the school's butterfly garden at lunch, writing in a notebook. We hit it off, and maintained a very close friendship until Sophomore year of high school, when his father had to transfer to Alabama, and the whole family moved away. The friendship has been a little quieter since then, but I would still consider Pat one of my best friends.
Personally, I would describe Pat as mildly effeminate, slim, and gentle. It was only after he moved to Alabama that I discovered he was also homosexual. I personally think that it was an unnoticed similarity in us at the time that helped us bond closer than I would with most males, or even females for that matter, in those years.
In grade school and through high school, I carried a passion for art and creating. Give me the choice between an english course and a social studies course, and I would probably choose english. I was very creative-mind oriented. I have rounded out a bit, but I still feel that the arts are much more fun and interesting than the sciences.
In grade school, I was part of a few extra-curricular activities: drama club and chorus namely. Neither of these were particularly male or female oriented. In high school I joined band, but less known, and more notably I also joined the cross-stitch club. I also think that I did one of the best jobs at the little baby-simulation exercise, where you have to carry a bag of flour around or an egg, or whatever. For us it was flour, and I rather enjoyed the whole thing.
After Pat moved, I have maintained contact with maybe three male friends, and through high school, my friend base shifted back toward the females, with three actual friends, and about a dozen school acquaintances. Several of these peers were in multiple art classes with me, so we had an ongoing connection and felt pretty comfortable with each other's company.
I went on to lead what most would consider a basically standard or "normal" male life from the end of high school until about July of 2007.
Occasionally something would pop up that would be incongruous, like I'd take notice of a cute pair of shoes a girl was wearing, or I'd sit and gossip. These moments were brief and easy for me to overlook though, and in review, nothing stands out particularly much.
Well, that's a good start at least. In the next couple of posts, I intend to also cover things that I feel I perceive differently, or feel differently about than the "typical" masculine male, and the time period leading up to my epiphany that transsexualism isn't just something on talk shows.
~R (Rue...Runa....Rufina?)
Lets do it
My Aunt Loretta and I used to have a very close relationship. She was the closest thing I ever had to a babysitter, since I never regularly needed supervision or anything like that. We'd spend occasional weekends together, going places, or just hanging out and listening to music, or me entertaining myself while she did homework or whatever.
Once, maybe twice, I recall we played with Barbies. I don't recall anything about it other than that. I remember enjoying the experience. Eventually, the age difference separated us as she moved on to college, and I was given an increasing workload in junior high and high school.
In grade school, I didn't really have any male friends. The boys were rough, mean, and very physical. I did not like sports, did not like fighting, and certainly did not like to deal with the somewhat immature manner in which they conducted themselves. As a result, I didn't have too many "friends" at all during this time period. A couple of acquaintances sure...but nobody who was a true honest friend.
My first real friend was Patrick. Pat was/is a very intelligent individual with a passion for life, and was generally soft spoken. I found him one day sitting out in the school's butterfly garden at lunch, writing in a notebook. We hit it off, and maintained a very close friendship until Sophomore year of high school, when his father had to transfer to Alabama, and the whole family moved away. The friendship has been a little quieter since then, but I would still consider Pat one of my best friends.
Personally, I would describe Pat as mildly effeminate, slim, and gentle. It was only after he moved to Alabama that I discovered he was also homosexual. I personally think that it was an unnoticed similarity in us at the time that helped us bond closer than I would with most males, or even females for that matter, in those years.
In grade school and through high school, I carried a passion for art and creating. Give me the choice between an english course and a social studies course, and I would probably choose english. I was very creative-mind oriented. I have rounded out a bit, but I still feel that the arts are much more fun and interesting than the sciences.
In grade school, I was part of a few extra-curricular activities: drama club and chorus namely. Neither of these were particularly male or female oriented. In high school I joined band, but less known, and more notably I also joined the cross-stitch club. I also think that I did one of the best jobs at the little baby-simulation exercise, where you have to carry a bag of flour around or an egg, or whatever. For us it was flour, and I rather enjoyed the whole thing.
After Pat moved, I have maintained contact with maybe three male friends, and through high school, my friend base shifted back toward the females, with three actual friends, and about a dozen school acquaintances. Several of these peers were in multiple art classes with me, so we had an ongoing connection and felt pretty comfortable with each other's company.
I went on to lead what most would consider a basically standard or "normal" male life from the end of high school until about July of 2007.
Occasionally something would pop up that would be incongruous, like I'd take notice of a cute pair of shoes a girl was wearing, or I'd sit and gossip. These moments were brief and easy for me to overlook though, and in review, nothing stands out particularly much.
Well, that's a good start at least. In the next couple of posts, I intend to also cover things that I feel I perceive differently, or feel differently about than the "typical" masculine male, and the time period leading up to my epiphany that transsexualism isn't just something on talk shows.
~R (Rue...Runa....Rufina?)
Lets do it