The Office Illiad
An epic battle I have just fought. A wasp somehow found it's way into my office, so I rolled up a Spring 2003 course book and swatted at it... It didn't die... I swatted again... and again it didn't die.... except now it was REALLY pissed. It flew away in a huff and the war was thus fourth waged. It hid in the light fixture for a while and studied my movements from above as I sat at my desk. I rolled up the course schedule tight, bound it with an elastic, and kept it close at my ready. I heard a faint buzzing noise to the west of me, but I looked and there was nothing. Then to my south I heard the barely audible clicking of an insect banging against a fluorescent light bulb... again I saw nothing... several minutes later the buzzing could once again be heard to my east... Clearly it was mocking me... Soon, just when I least expected it, the insect made its move. It came from behind a nearby fixture and dive-bombed me from above as if it were Manfred von Richthofen reincarnated. With the reflexes of a jungle cat, I dodged my adversary's attack and prepared for melee. Alas it had once again disappeared into the shadows of the office. Promptly though, it attacked once more. It dove at me, missing my head by inches and collided with the surface of my desk. I wielded my weapon and attacked with fury. A lengthy battle ensued, and in the end my worth adversary fell victim to the blunt trauma imposed by my tightly bound course schedule. I found some scissors, cut up my fallen enemy, and sent his pieces to the three corners of my office kingdom. His stinger, which was still writhing and exposing it's venomous needle long after it had already been severed went to the trash can by the door, his body went to the trash can by Sonya's desk, and his head stayed here in my trash can as a reminder to all other wasps of the fate they shall encounter if they cross me.... for I am... THE WASP SLAYER!!! dun, dun, dun