[Multi part] The Untitled Story of You and Me (part 3/?)
Title : The Untitled Story of You and Me (part 3/?)
Author : me
Beta : The super amazing kissmegreen (Yes, I finally have a beta reader *dancing around*)
Pairing : JunDa, (slight)AKame, KAT-TUN friendship
Rating : G - PG13
Genre : AU, Romance, Friendship, FLUFF
Disclaimer : They are belong to each other their own self
Summary : Taguchi has his ears to all of his friends story, including Tatsuya. But somehow, Tatsuya feels there's something wrong with his friend. That makes Tatsuya confronts him TWICE. Why's that?
A/N: This fic is dedicated to miika_daiscent for listening my rants and complains >w< And also thank you so so so much, kissmegreen aka Lyan, this chapter's so beautiful because of you *hug you tight*. And to all JunDa lovers!!! Right, I'll stop rambling, now to the fic!!
||
Kazuya turns off the stove gritting his teeth at being unable to concentrate on his cooking because the Akanishi and Nakamaru duo are noisily washing the dishes beside him.
“Nakamaru, the way you are holding the plates is wrong! This is how you do it,” Akanishi said taking the plate from Nakamaru and showing him the-correct-way-of-holding-the-plate-using-an-Akanishi-style. Nakamaru frowns.
“Bakanishi! Be careful, you baka! Don’t just carelessly take the plate or it will break!!” He replies as he tries to retrieve the dish from Akanishi’s hand. But Akanishi doesn’t want to lose, he grips the plate tighter.
Kame’s patience finally reaches its limit pushing him to take water from the refrigerator and mercilessly starts pouring it on the noisy duo, causing them to “HUAAAAA” in choir.
“Shut up, you two! Don’t you see that I’m trying to cook our dinner? Or would you rather see me fail at cooking? Do you want to eat a burnt-squid instead of a grilled-squid, eh?” Kame scolds the wet duo in front of him.
“Hai~ Kame... gomenasai.” Nakamaru’s bows apologetically to Kame. “Bakanishi, you should tell Kame you are sorry as well!”
“Mou, Kazu-chan, Gomen ne, of course I don’t want to eat a burnt-squid...” Akanishi clings to Kame, lips now curved into an adorable perfect pout. Kame rolls his eyes at seeing this, thinking just how clingy Jin can be when he, Kame gets angry with him.
“Right. Very good. Now that we can FINALLY have some peace and quite, both of you can start setting the table...” Kame stopped mid-sentence, “wait, now that I think about it, I think it would be better for us if I separate you two… the last thing I need is another chatty noisy and pointless conversation like earlier. Now, Akanishi..” Kame looks to see Jin still pouting even as he called his name ‘Akanishi’, Kame gave out a sigh, “fine, Jin, you arrange the dining table. And Nakamaru-kun, you stay here and continue washing the dishes.”
“And, no buts, Jin. Do it now or our plan this weekend will be cancelled?” Kame threatens when he sees a sign of an attempted interruption from Akanishi. Akanishi stumps off to the dining room, grumbling.
Kame sighs at his boyfriend’s behaviour. He really looks like a child when he’s sulking like that. One could never guarantee a peaceful day whenever Akanishi and Nakamaru meet. Kame wonders how their club members tolerate all the noise that the two would always make. He could only shake his head as the same time Koki enters the kitchen wearing his wry face.
“What’s wrong, Koki? Do you have a problem? What’s with your wry face, huh?” Kame asks.
“It’s Nishikido sempai,” Koki responds drinking some water before he continues with his story, “He’s so angry at Ueda. According to him, Ueda didn’t finish his job as in fully writing out the results of the questionaire and so he’s super furious that he had me replace Ueda to finish the job. Being alone with Nishikido in that room was definitely one of the worst moments ever, worse yet when he’s that angry. I bet Ueda is in big trouble right now. What made him decide to leave in the middle of club activities back then? It’s not like him at all.” Koki shakes his head indicating his disapproval of Ueda’s earlier behavior.
“Now that you said it, it seems like Ueda was as pissed at Nishikido,” Akanishi joins in after overhearing the conversation between Koki and Kame, “He looked furious when he came home and as you know he’s super creepy when he’s angry. He came in right as we were forcing Taguchi to wash the dishes instead of us having to do it... we were practically making fun of Taguchi when he walked in.” Akanishi gives out a dramatic sigh before continuing his recollection of what happened, “Maybe he’s angry with Taguchi, because he just angrily grabbed Taguchi’s wrist and dragged him upstairs.”
“Eh? He was angry with Taguchi? Really? But why?” Koki rolls his eyes at hearing Akanishi’s story. Taguchi is the closest person to Ueda, Ueda is so protective of the guy so hearing that Ueda is angry with Taguchi to the point of angrily dragging him upstairs was unbelievable to Koki.
“Un,” Nakamaru answers this time, “although Taguchi did seem oblivious as usual. Why? What happen?” He asks more to himself.
Kame’s becomes confused after hearing all that. They are all in agreement that Ueda spoils Taguchi … A lot, he always protects Taguchi from others taking advantage of him. Ueda can’t bear or rather Ueda doesn’t tolerate any insults towards Taguchi, even if Taguchi seems fine with all the ill treatments… even if he acts like he’s enjoying them with his ever smiling face... and for this reason, the four boys are thinking the same thing, “Why?”
Suddenly, a loud thump was heard from upstairs causing the four boys to quickly snap from their speculating thoughts. They looks at each other… a worried look.
“Taguchi’s room!!” And with a rush, they quickly run upstairs towards the room from which the noise was heard, finding themselves standing in front of Taguchi’s door, breathless from their hasty rush, knocking on the door in front of them, or to be more précised, banging hard as if they were trying to break the door open.
“Taguchi, open the door!!”
“Ueda!!!”
“Tatsuya, Taguchi!!"
“Oi, Taguchi, what’s happening with you guys? OI!!”
The boys’ knocking is met by silence making them more anxious and nervous wondering what is going on behind the closed door. Suddenly, they hear a husky yet cold shout from Ueda… a furious angry shout.
“Go away! Don’t come inside here!”
The guys, stunned by the sound and tone of Tatsuya’s voice, exchanged stares with each other before Kame breaks the silence,
“Tatsuya, Taguchi, what’s happening with you guys? Come on now, talk to us, let’s talk about it...”
“I SAID... GO!! AWAY!!” Tatsuya shouts again making the four worried housemates walk away slowly in defeat… no one dared to argue with Tatsuya.
*****
Taguchi releases his grip on Tatsuya’s collar after hearing the yells coming from outside. He’s seems surprised at his own behaviour minutes ago. Slowly, he turns his body, and stays away from Tatsuya... he can feel Tatsuya’s gaze following him.
“Go away! Don’t come inside here!” Taguchi listens as Tatsuya yells to his friends. Tatsuya never shouts at anyone. He knows of Tatsuya being cold to them, but he never shouts at them... Especially with such a harsh tone.
Tatsuya listens as Kame said something to them outside the room, but he didn’t care. He doesn’t want his confrontation with Taguchi to be disturbed.
“I SAID... GO!! AWAY!!” Tatsuya shouts again, he could feel the silence beyond the closed door as his friends became silent after his second shouting. Yet, his eyes remain focused on Taguchi’s forcing him to shift his eyes to the floor, still surprised by his earlier behaviour. Maybe he was surprised by his own behaviour earlier as well, Tatsuya thought. But Tatsuya didn’t want to give up now.
Tatsuya roughly turns Taguchi around causing them to face each other again. “This is my fucking problem, Taguchi. You’re my friend. And I’ll do anything I can to help my friends inneed,” but somehow, Tatsuya feels there’s something not right in his words. “Look me in the eyes, Taguchi, Please?”
Tatsuya looks as Taguchi lifts his head causing their eyes meet. Tatsuya could see Taguchi’s earlier anger disappearing from his eyes and was being replaced by a confused look. Tatsuya smiles inside his heart, knowing that Taguchi is fighting with himself… questioning himself on whether or not to trust Tatsuya… all he needed was a little push.
“Taguchi, please do tell me what’s on your mind? what makes you think you can’t tell us anything? Tell me anything? You know, someone calls another a friend, if he could give and accept. You accept many people’s story and they tell you their stories… their problems because they believe in you. But you, we never know what exactly you are thinking. I do think that you are my friend, Taguchi,”, Again, Tatsuya feels there was something wrong with his last sentence but he continues hoping to make up for it, “My best friend… I trust you… I believe you are to be trusted. But again, you... what about you? Even though we talk to each other a lot I still don’t even know what you are thinking. You’re always smiling, but are those smiles from your heart?.... I know they are not and you can’t tell me otherwise. Am I the only one who assumes that we’re a friends here? Have you ever, for once, considered me as your friend?”
Taguchi remains silent causing Tatsuya to sigh again in deep frustration.
“Fine. Okay then, Taguchi. If you don’t want to tell me your problems... because I know you have a problem… If you still insist on keeping all your problems and secrets bottled inside then it seems like our friendship will end here. I cannot be friends with a guy who doen’t trusts me...” Tatsuya didn’t finish his words, as he leaves them hanging in the middle of the sentence at seeing Taguchi’s confused expression slowly changing into fear… his body shuddering… shivering.
“Taguchi? Taguchi? What happen?” Tatsuya asks nervously and confuse with the change in Taguchi’s behavior.
Taguchi frees himself from Tatsuya and sits on his bed. Tatsuya could see Taguchi’s body was still shaking. Slowly he once again approaches Taguchi, standing in front the shivering boy, his ‘best friend’.
“Taguchi..?” Tatsuya asked in a gentle tone as Taguchi pulls him closer and places his head on his chest.
“Please... don’t. Don’t, Uepi! Don’t say something like that. Don’t leave me.” Taguchi muttered softly to Tatsuya, his head still resting on the other’s chest. Tatsuya sighs slowly and further pulling Taguchi into his embrace… bringing his head down to meet and rest on Taguchi’s.
“Don’t.... leave me alone, again. Please...” Taguchi still mumbling softly, his body still shaking. He looks like he’s in a trance, causing Tatsuya to become confused at what’s happening in front of him. Awkwardly he removes one of his hand that’s embracing Taguchi, but instead uses it to lightly touch Taguchi’s head, stroking it slowly.
“Don’t leave me, like they did to me, Uepi!!” Taguchi whispers, tightening his embrace around Tatsuya’s waist… As if he doesn’t want to lose him.
“Never, Taguchi. I will never do what they did to you. I will always be here beside you. I will never be like them. Who are they? Can you tell me? What did they do to you?” Tatsuya lifts Taguchi’s face so he could once again face him directly. but Taguchi only shakes his head, snuggling against Tatsuya’s chest again.
“Please Taguchi. You know I will never leave you no matter what. I will always be here for you. Please, tell me..” Tatsuya reassures the other, lightly stroking his hair.
Still in Tatsuya’s embrace, Taguchi sighs just before he starts, “My parents divorced when I was 5 years old.” Tatsuya listens to him in silence. “They got divorced because of my father, he was so messed up, always came home drunk. He always spent our family’s money on gambling. He and Mom would always fight at home. It was so bad that he ended up hitting my mother and after that he left home with whatever money we had. Following that, my mom never let neither my brother nor I to leave our room except for school, because she was afraid that my father would one day come home and take us away from her… I think she mostly feared that he would sell us to the loan shark to repay his debts.
My Mom was afraid that this problem would affect us.. afraid that I would be traumatised by what was happening them, so she told me to smile… she told me that whatever happens I should smile.. she told me that no matter how bad the situation or condition is, I have to keep smiling. If she caught me crying even once even when she was being beaten by my dad, she would hit me… She always encouraged me to smile.
Of course I didn’t want to be beaten so instead I forced myself from back then to get accustom to smiling in front of everyone. I guess that’s why my friends like to be with me, because I’m always smiling, I never rejected them… I never objected to anything they want… even though sometimes they bully me, I never get angry at them. But after a while, they get bored of my constant smiling, saying that I had to be crazy for always keeping up that mannerism… they say I’m annoying and after a while they all leave… they leave me all alone…
Not long after the divorce, my dad passed away. I was told he was hit by a truck while running from debt collectors… he died instantly… even my dad left me alone.
And my mom, she still loved my dad even long after the divorce... she loved him deeply.. I know she did… when she heard the news of his death she was so shocked… traumatized to the point where he ended up having to be admitted into the psychiatric hospital for treatment. Her depression caused by the shock was so severe to the point where she didn’t even remember me or my brother. Eventually, she died when 10 yrs old.
I ended up living with my brother… the two of us lone. He was 12 years older than I was so we were never close… he was never comfortable with me around... he didn’t even bother greeting me sometimes with a simple hello. I, on the other hand, I always wanted to play with him when we were younger but he would always leave me behind at home while he went out with his school friends… to the festivals… he went everywhere without me. He was so clever…. So smart, and soon after he received a scholarship to further his studies abroad… he finally left…. Left me alone for good… I was left alone…. left alone again...
Taguchi’s hug tightens even further around Tatsuya’s waist as he forces himself to continue,“ I couldn’t say anything to anyone, right? Otherwise they would all leave me alone. No one would bother staying with me. No one.
The few friends I have asked me the same question you did but I couldn’t tell them… I couldn’t say it because I didn’t want you guys to leave me like everyone did in the past” Taguchi lifts his face to see Tatsuya’s.
“Uepi, I don’t want to lose you. I was so happy hearing you say I am your best friend and the one you trusts to tell your problems to. I didn’t want to tell you about my problems and about my past, because I was afraid that you too would leave me in the end, like everyone else.” Tatsuya saw a trace of tears in Taguchi’s eyes.
“NEVER.. Taguchi, I will never leave you.. I will always be here for you. I said that earlier right?” Tatsuya said with a soft smile on his face, wiping the tears from Taguchi’s face.
Still in Taguchi’s tight embrace, Tatsuya looks down to see Taguchi smiling up at him… a very different smile Tatsuya notes… different from the painfully forced smile he wore moments before… his present smile is innocent and pure... just like a child’s. Tatsuya felt a sudden urge to hug him and keep him in his embrace, forever.
“Thank you, Uepi. Thank you!!” Taguchi put his head to Tatsuya’s chest again living in the other’s embrace, feeling safe and secure. Tatsuya doesn’t understand why, but he is happy to hear Taguchi call him ‘Uepi’ and not the usual‘Tatsuya’ used by their friends. It makes him feel like he was different… special in Taguchi’s eyes.
“But... what happen to your brother? where is he now?” Tatsuya asks. Taguchi remains silent for a moment.
“He..... after he finished his masters degree in America’s, he got married and is now succesfully running his own company that he pioneered by himself there.”
“And left you alone in Japan?” Tatsuya asks in disbelief.
“Umm... no. I lived with someone that my brother trusted and he [my brother] would come to Japan sometimes as well.” Once again Taguchi lifted his head, only to see Tatsuya’s worried face.
“And I’m not alone, Tatsuya. I’m living in this pavilion with you guys. With you. Don’t worry, Tatsuya!” his hands reaching out and caressing Tatsuya’s cheek, trying to calm him down. Tatsuya smiles softly at Taguchi’s touch on his face.
“Junno.. “ Tatsuya calls hesitately, “Can I call you Junno? I don’t like to call you by your family name, it doesn’t make us seem close. Plus, I don’t want to call you using the same name others use to call you. Is that okay?” Tatsuya asks, his hand still stroking Taguchi’s hair. Under his stroking, Taguchi slowly nods.
“And I will call you Uepi, It’s cute, don’t you think?” Taguchi looks up at Tatsuya’s face again and is greeted by an approving and cheeky smile in response to his question. He smiles back, replacing his head where it belongs… on Tatsuya’s chest, getting use to the slender fingers gently stroking his hair… if it’s Tatsuya’s touch, then he could stay in this position for ever.
“I like to see your smile, Uepi. It makes me happy.” Taguchi mumbles. Tatsuya after realizing that Taguchi is beginning to fall asleep in their embrace moves to lay him on the bed. Tatsuya is still smiling, bringing his face close to Taguchi’s and in a whisper, he utters,“Good night, Junno”, giving a final stroke as his hand now lingers in the softness of Junno’s hair... he leans down and seals their night and deepened friendship with a kiss on Junno’s forehead before slowly leaving the room, for the other was now in a deep slumber.
See, no cliffie for now. But It hasn't finish yet! Because I don't want them remain be just friends XD. I'm sorry for the late update, though >__<
Author : me
Beta : The super amazing kissmegreen (Yes, I finally have a beta reader *dancing around*)
Pairing : JunDa, (slight)AKame, KAT-TUN friendship
Rating : G - PG13
Genre : AU, Romance, Friendship, FLUFF
Disclaimer : They are belong to each other their own self
Summary : Taguchi has his ears to all of his friends story, including Tatsuya. But somehow, Tatsuya feels there's something wrong with his friend. That makes Tatsuya confronts him TWICE. Why's that?
A/N: This fic is dedicated to miika_daiscent for listening my rants and complains >w< And also thank you so so so much, kissmegreen aka Lyan, this chapter's so beautiful because of you *hug you tight*. And to all JunDa lovers!!! Right, I'll stop rambling, now to the fic!!
||
Kazuya turns off the stove gritting his teeth at being unable to concentrate on his cooking because the Akanishi and Nakamaru duo are noisily washing the dishes beside him.
“Nakamaru, the way you are holding the plates is wrong! This is how you do it,” Akanishi said taking the plate from Nakamaru and showing him the-correct-way-of-holding-the-plate-using-an-Akanishi-style. Nakamaru frowns.
“Bakanishi! Be careful, you baka! Don’t just carelessly take the plate or it will break!!” He replies as he tries to retrieve the dish from Akanishi’s hand. But Akanishi doesn’t want to lose, he grips the plate tighter.
Kame’s patience finally reaches its limit pushing him to take water from the refrigerator and mercilessly starts pouring it on the noisy duo, causing them to “HUAAAAA” in choir.
“Shut up, you two! Don’t you see that I’m trying to cook our dinner? Or would you rather see me fail at cooking? Do you want to eat a burnt-squid instead of a grilled-squid, eh?” Kame scolds the wet duo in front of him.
“Hai~ Kame... gomenasai.” Nakamaru’s bows apologetically to Kame. “Bakanishi, you should tell Kame you are sorry as well!”
“Mou, Kazu-chan, Gomen ne, of course I don’t want to eat a burnt-squid...” Akanishi clings to Kame, lips now curved into an adorable perfect pout. Kame rolls his eyes at seeing this, thinking just how clingy Jin can be when he, Kame gets angry with him.
“Right. Very good. Now that we can FINALLY have some peace and quite, both of you can start setting the table...” Kame stopped mid-sentence, “wait, now that I think about it, I think it would be better for us if I separate you two… the last thing I need is another chatty noisy and pointless conversation like earlier. Now, Akanishi..” Kame looks to see Jin still pouting even as he called his name ‘Akanishi’, Kame gave out a sigh, “fine, Jin, you arrange the dining table. And Nakamaru-kun, you stay here and continue washing the dishes.”
“And, no buts, Jin. Do it now or our plan this weekend will be cancelled?” Kame threatens when he sees a sign of an attempted interruption from Akanishi. Akanishi stumps off to the dining room, grumbling.
Kame sighs at his boyfriend’s behaviour. He really looks like a child when he’s sulking like that. One could never guarantee a peaceful day whenever Akanishi and Nakamaru meet. Kame wonders how their club members tolerate all the noise that the two would always make. He could only shake his head as the same time Koki enters the kitchen wearing his wry face.
“What’s wrong, Koki? Do you have a problem? What’s with your wry face, huh?” Kame asks.
“It’s Nishikido sempai,” Koki responds drinking some water before he continues with his story, “He’s so angry at Ueda. According to him, Ueda didn’t finish his job as in fully writing out the results of the questionaire and so he’s super furious that he had me replace Ueda to finish the job. Being alone with Nishikido in that room was definitely one of the worst moments ever, worse yet when he’s that angry. I bet Ueda is in big trouble right now. What made him decide to leave in the middle of club activities back then? It’s not like him at all.” Koki shakes his head indicating his disapproval of Ueda’s earlier behavior.
“Now that you said it, it seems like Ueda was as pissed at Nishikido,” Akanishi joins in after overhearing the conversation between Koki and Kame, “He looked furious when he came home and as you know he’s super creepy when he’s angry. He came in right as we were forcing Taguchi to wash the dishes instead of us having to do it... we were practically making fun of Taguchi when he walked in.” Akanishi gives out a dramatic sigh before continuing his recollection of what happened, “Maybe he’s angry with Taguchi, because he just angrily grabbed Taguchi’s wrist and dragged him upstairs.”
“Eh? He was angry with Taguchi? Really? But why?” Koki rolls his eyes at hearing Akanishi’s story. Taguchi is the closest person to Ueda, Ueda is so protective of the guy so hearing that Ueda is angry with Taguchi to the point of angrily dragging him upstairs was unbelievable to Koki.
“Un,” Nakamaru answers this time, “although Taguchi did seem oblivious as usual. Why? What happen?” He asks more to himself.
Kame’s becomes confused after hearing all that. They are all in agreement that Ueda spoils Taguchi … A lot, he always protects Taguchi from others taking advantage of him. Ueda can’t bear or rather Ueda doesn’t tolerate any insults towards Taguchi, even if Taguchi seems fine with all the ill treatments… even if he acts like he’s enjoying them with his ever smiling face... and for this reason, the four boys are thinking the same thing, “Why?”
Suddenly, a loud thump was heard from upstairs causing the four boys to quickly snap from their speculating thoughts. They looks at each other… a worried look.
“Taguchi’s room!!” And with a rush, they quickly run upstairs towards the room from which the noise was heard, finding themselves standing in front of Taguchi’s door, breathless from their hasty rush, knocking on the door in front of them, or to be more précised, banging hard as if they were trying to break the door open.
“Taguchi, open the door!!”
“Ueda!!!”
“Tatsuya, Taguchi!!"
“Oi, Taguchi, what’s happening with you guys? OI!!”
The boys’ knocking is met by silence making them more anxious and nervous wondering what is going on behind the closed door. Suddenly, they hear a husky yet cold shout from Ueda… a furious angry shout.
“Go away! Don’t come inside here!”
The guys, stunned by the sound and tone of Tatsuya’s voice, exchanged stares with each other before Kame breaks the silence,
“Tatsuya, Taguchi, what’s happening with you guys? Come on now, talk to us, let’s talk about it...”
“I SAID... GO!! AWAY!!” Tatsuya shouts again making the four worried housemates walk away slowly in defeat… no one dared to argue with Tatsuya.
*****
Taguchi releases his grip on Tatsuya’s collar after hearing the yells coming from outside. He’s seems surprised at his own behaviour minutes ago. Slowly, he turns his body, and stays away from Tatsuya... he can feel Tatsuya’s gaze following him.
“Go away! Don’t come inside here!” Taguchi listens as Tatsuya yells to his friends. Tatsuya never shouts at anyone. He knows of Tatsuya being cold to them, but he never shouts at them... Especially with such a harsh tone.
Tatsuya listens as Kame said something to them outside the room, but he didn’t care. He doesn’t want his confrontation with Taguchi to be disturbed.
“I SAID... GO!! AWAY!!” Tatsuya shouts again, he could feel the silence beyond the closed door as his friends became silent after his second shouting. Yet, his eyes remain focused on Taguchi’s forcing him to shift his eyes to the floor, still surprised by his earlier behaviour. Maybe he was surprised by his own behaviour earlier as well, Tatsuya thought. But Tatsuya didn’t want to give up now.
Tatsuya roughly turns Taguchi around causing them to face each other again. “This is my fucking problem, Taguchi. You’re my friend. And I’ll do anything I can to help my friends inneed,” but somehow, Tatsuya feels there’s something not right in his words. “Look me in the eyes, Taguchi, Please?”
Tatsuya looks as Taguchi lifts his head causing their eyes meet. Tatsuya could see Taguchi’s earlier anger disappearing from his eyes and was being replaced by a confused look. Tatsuya smiles inside his heart, knowing that Taguchi is fighting with himself… questioning himself on whether or not to trust Tatsuya… all he needed was a little push.
“Taguchi, please do tell me what’s on your mind? what makes you think you can’t tell us anything? Tell me anything? You know, someone calls another a friend, if he could give and accept. You accept many people’s story and they tell you their stories… their problems because they believe in you. But you, we never know what exactly you are thinking. I do think that you are my friend, Taguchi,”, Again, Tatsuya feels there was something wrong with his last sentence but he continues hoping to make up for it, “My best friend… I trust you… I believe you are to be trusted. But again, you... what about you? Even though we talk to each other a lot I still don’t even know what you are thinking. You’re always smiling, but are those smiles from your heart?.... I know they are not and you can’t tell me otherwise. Am I the only one who assumes that we’re a friends here? Have you ever, for once, considered me as your friend?”
Taguchi remains silent causing Tatsuya to sigh again in deep frustration.
“Fine. Okay then, Taguchi. If you don’t want to tell me your problems... because I know you have a problem… If you still insist on keeping all your problems and secrets bottled inside then it seems like our friendship will end here. I cannot be friends with a guy who doen’t trusts me...” Tatsuya didn’t finish his words, as he leaves them hanging in the middle of the sentence at seeing Taguchi’s confused expression slowly changing into fear… his body shuddering… shivering.
“Taguchi? Taguchi? What happen?” Tatsuya asks nervously and confuse with the change in Taguchi’s behavior.
Taguchi frees himself from Tatsuya and sits on his bed. Tatsuya could see Taguchi’s body was still shaking. Slowly he once again approaches Taguchi, standing in front the shivering boy, his ‘best friend’.
“Taguchi..?” Tatsuya asked in a gentle tone as Taguchi pulls him closer and places his head on his chest.
“Please... don’t. Don’t, Uepi! Don’t say something like that. Don’t leave me.” Taguchi muttered softly to Tatsuya, his head still resting on the other’s chest. Tatsuya sighs slowly and further pulling Taguchi into his embrace… bringing his head down to meet and rest on Taguchi’s.
“Don’t.... leave me alone, again. Please...” Taguchi still mumbling softly, his body still shaking. He looks like he’s in a trance, causing Tatsuya to become confused at what’s happening in front of him. Awkwardly he removes one of his hand that’s embracing Taguchi, but instead uses it to lightly touch Taguchi’s head, stroking it slowly.
“Don’t leave me, like they did to me, Uepi!!” Taguchi whispers, tightening his embrace around Tatsuya’s waist… As if he doesn’t want to lose him.
“Never, Taguchi. I will never do what they did to you. I will always be here beside you. I will never be like them. Who are they? Can you tell me? What did they do to you?” Tatsuya lifts Taguchi’s face so he could once again face him directly. but Taguchi only shakes his head, snuggling against Tatsuya’s chest again.
“Please Taguchi. You know I will never leave you no matter what. I will always be here for you. Please, tell me..” Tatsuya reassures the other, lightly stroking his hair.
Still in Tatsuya’s embrace, Taguchi sighs just before he starts, “My parents divorced when I was 5 years old.” Tatsuya listens to him in silence. “They got divorced because of my father, he was so messed up, always came home drunk. He always spent our family’s money on gambling. He and Mom would always fight at home. It was so bad that he ended up hitting my mother and after that he left home with whatever money we had. Following that, my mom never let neither my brother nor I to leave our room except for school, because she was afraid that my father would one day come home and take us away from her… I think she mostly feared that he would sell us to the loan shark to repay his debts.
My Mom was afraid that this problem would affect us.. afraid that I would be traumatised by what was happening them, so she told me to smile… she told me that whatever happens I should smile.. she told me that no matter how bad the situation or condition is, I have to keep smiling. If she caught me crying even once even when she was being beaten by my dad, she would hit me… She always encouraged me to smile.
Of course I didn’t want to be beaten so instead I forced myself from back then to get accustom to smiling in front of everyone. I guess that’s why my friends like to be with me, because I’m always smiling, I never rejected them… I never objected to anything they want… even though sometimes they bully me, I never get angry at them. But after a while, they get bored of my constant smiling, saying that I had to be crazy for always keeping up that mannerism… they say I’m annoying and after a while they all leave… they leave me all alone…
Not long after the divorce, my dad passed away. I was told he was hit by a truck while running from debt collectors… he died instantly… even my dad left me alone.
And my mom, she still loved my dad even long after the divorce... she loved him deeply.. I know she did… when she heard the news of his death she was so shocked… traumatized to the point where he ended up having to be admitted into the psychiatric hospital for treatment. Her depression caused by the shock was so severe to the point where she didn’t even remember me or my brother. Eventually, she died when 10 yrs old.
I ended up living with my brother… the two of us lone. He was 12 years older than I was so we were never close… he was never comfortable with me around... he didn’t even bother greeting me sometimes with a simple hello. I, on the other hand, I always wanted to play with him when we were younger but he would always leave me behind at home while he went out with his school friends… to the festivals… he went everywhere without me. He was so clever…. So smart, and soon after he received a scholarship to further his studies abroad… he finally left…. Left me alone for good… I was left alone…. left alone again...
Taguchi’s hug tightens even further around Tatsuya’s waist as he forces himself to continue,“ I couldn’t say anything to anyone, right? Otherwise they would all leave me alone. No one would bother staying with me. No one.
The few friends I have asked me the same question you did but I couldn’t tell them… I couldn’t say it because I didn’t want you guys to leave me like everyone did in the past” Taguchi lifts his face to see Tatsuya’s.
“Uepi, I don’t want to lose you. I was so happy hearing you say I am your best friend and the one you trusts to tell your problems to. I didn’t want to tell you about my problems and about my past, because I was afraid that you too would leave me in the end, like everyone else.” Tatsuya saw a trace of tears in Taguchi’s eyes.
“NEVER.. Taguchi, I will never leave you.. I will always be here for you. I said that earlier right?” Tatsuya said with a soft smile on his face, wiping the tears from Taguchi’s face.
Still in Taguchi’s tight embrace, Tatsuya looks down to see Taguchi smiling up at him… a very different smile Tatsuya notes… different from the painfully forced smile he wore moments before… his present smile is innocent and pure... just like a child’s. Tatsuya felt a sudden urge to hug him and keep him in his embrace, forever.
“Thank you, Uepi. Thank you!!” Taguchi put his head to Tatsuya’s chest again living in the other’s embrace, feeling safe and secure. Tatsuya doesn’t understand why, but he is happy to hear Taguchi call him ‘Uepi’ and not the usual‘Tatsuya’ used by their friends. It makes him feel like he was different… special in Taguchi’s eyes.
“But... what happen to your brother? where is he now?” Tatsuya asks. Taguchi remains silent for a moment.
“He..... after he finished his masters degree in America’s, he got married and is now succesfully running his own company that he pioneered by himself there.”
“And left you alone in Japan?” Tatsuya asks in disbelief.
“Umm... no. I lived with someone that my brother trusted and he [my brother] would come to Japan sometimes as well.” Once again Taguchi lifted his head, only to see Tatsuya’s worried face.
“And I’m not alone, Tatsuya. I’m living in this pavilion with you guys. With you. Don’t worry, Tatsuya!” his hands reaching out and caressing Tatsuya’s cheek, trying to calm him down. Tatsuya smiles softly at Taguchi’s touch on his face.
“Junno.. “ Tatsuya calls hesitately, “Can I call you Junno? I don’t like to call you by your family name, it doesn’t make us seem close. Plus, I don’t want to call you using the same name others use to call you. Is that okay?” Tatsuya asks, his hand still stroking Taguchi’s hair. Under his stroking, Taguchi slowly nods.
“And I will call you Uepi, It’s cute, don’t you think?” Taguchi looks up at Tatsuya’s face again and is greeted by an approving and cheeky smile in response to his question. He smiles back, replacing his head where it belongs… on Tatsuya’s chest, getting use to the slender fingers gently stroking his hair… if it’s Tatsuya’s touch, then he could stay in this position for ever.
“I like to see your smile, Uepi. It makes me happy.” Taguchi mumbles. Tatsuya after realizing that Taguchi is beginning to fall asleep in their embrace moves to lay him on the bed. Tatsuya is still smiling, bringing his face close to Taguchi’s and in a whisper, he utters,“Good night, Junno”, giving a final stroke as his hand now lingers in the softness of Junno’s hair... he leans down and seals their night and deepened friendship with a kiss on Junno’s forehead before slowly leaving the room, for the other was now in a deep slumber.
See, no cliffie for now. But It hasn't finish yet! Because I don't want them remain be just friends XD. I'm sorry for the late update, though >__<