heartbeat DECISION hearbeat CHANGE OF DECISION heartbeat...
So. I'm an impulse decision maker. I think. Actually, I'm really indecisive at the same time. I think.
People, this is the problem with being a Cancer. I'm a little bit of this, a little bit of that, all rolled into one crazy human being.
I say the impulse decision maker because I'm sitting here with an Avon magazine someone left at work and I found a ton of stuff I want in it. The more I look through the catalogue, the more I'm like "WOW, that's cute... and so cheap! I want it! Oh, this magazine's cute. That nail polish looks fun. OH MY GOD LOOK AT THE SCARVES!". And this led to me thinking, "Hey, I could sell Avon! I bet they get discounts and just LOOK at that outfit!" I immediately went to the computer and started looking up the Avon and mark. websites to figure out how to become a consultant. And then I said, "Yo, Sam. That's a great idea and all and IMMA LET YOU FINISH, but you know you can't sell nothin' like that!"
And that's when I thanked the good Lord up above for Kanye West (like I always do before every meal and on the strike of every hour) and stopped myself.
Because I may be really bad at deciding which restaurant to eat at or whether or not I feel like wearing boots or flats, but when I get an idea, I FUCKING RUN WITH IT. I'm talking A Sprint For the Finish Line While That Bad Guy From Die Hard Played by Alan Rickman Is Following You and Screaming Halt, You Stupid Bitch run. It's intense shit. And I have to calm myself down. Because I don't know the first thing about what I'm doing with these ideas, I just know THAT I WANT IT AND I WANT IT NOW. GET ME A GOLDEN GOOSE EGG.
But then, maybe it's good I'm like that? Can I call that spontaneity? Reckless behavior? I just don't know. I like that I get so excited about an idea that it almost makes me dizzy and want to poop my pants, but I don't like that I turn right around and get depressed when I realize it won't work.
All I know is that I have an entire world to conquer, people. This all ties in with that debate I have with myself on a daily basis. Is being an actor all there really is to my life? Is that the only thing I want to do?
I want to be an actor more than anything. It's the ONLY thing I've ever wanted to do with my life. When actors say in magazines, "I'm more than just an actor", I've never been able to connect. Why would you want to be more? But I realize now that it isn't that I don't want to be more, it's that I thought I COULDN'T be more. I thought, "Being an actor is all you've ever wanted, so you can't write a novel or learn how to cook or speak French fluently or travel or ANYTHING ELSE EVER UNLESS THERE'S A CAMERA AND DIRECTOR FOLLOWING YOU." And that's dumb. I am going to be an actor. I am an actor. And I'm so much more than that, you know?
I mean, I'm also a potential Avon sales consultant.
People, this is the problem with being a Cancer. I'm a little bit of this, a little bit of that, all rolled into one crazy human being.
I say the impulse decision maker because I'm sitting here with an Avon magazine someone left at work and I found a ton of stuff I want in it. The more I look through the catalogue, the more I'm like "WOW, that's cute... and so cheap! I want it! Oh, this magazine's cute. That nail polish looks fun. OH MY GOD LOOK AT THE SCARVES!". And this led to me thinking, "Hey, I could sell Avon! I bet they get discounts and just LOOK at that outfit!" I immediately went to the computer and started looking up the Avon and mark. websites to figure out how to become a consultant. And then I said, "Yo, Sam. That's a great idea and all and IMMA LET YOU FINISH, but you know you can't sell nothin' like that!"
And that's when I thanked the good Lord up above for Kanye West (like I always do before every meal and on the strike of every hour) and stopped myself.
Because I may be really bad at deciding which restaurant to eat at or whether or not I feel like wearing boots or flats, but when I get an idea, I FUCKING RUN WITH IT. I'm talking A Sprint For the Finish Line While That Bad Guy From Die Hard Played by Alan Rickman Is Following You and Screaming Halt, You Stupid Bitch run. It's intense shit. And I have to calm myself down. Because I don't know the first thing about what I'm doing with these ideas, I just know THAT I WANT IT AND I WANT IT NOW. GET ME A GOLDEN GOOSE EGG.
But then, maybe it's good I'm like that? Can I call that spontaneity? Reckless behavior? I just don't know. I like that I get so excited about an idea that it almost makes me dizzy and want to poop my pants, but I don't like that I turn right around and get depressed when I realize it won't work.
All I know is that I have an entire world to conquer, people. This all ties in with that debate I have with myself on a daily basis. Is being an actor all there really is to my life? Is that the only thing I want to do?
I want to be an actor more than anything. It's the ONLY thing I've ever wanted to do with my life. When actors say in magazines, "I'm more than just an actor", I've never been able to connect. Why would you want to be more? But I realize now that it isn't that I don't want to be more, it's that I thought I COULDN'T be more. I thought, "Being an actor is all you've ever wanted, so you can't write a novel or learn how to cook or speak French fluently or travel or ANYTHING ELSE EVER UNLESS THERE'S A CAMERA AND DIRECTOR FOLLOWING YOU." And that's dumb. I am going to be an actor. I am an actor. And I'm so much more than that, you know?
I mean, I'm also a potential Avon sales consultant.