I'd Still Love To Know How He Managed To Clone Her
Here's the results to that characters/questions meme from the other day.
...Although I can't help feeling, at this point, anything would pale in comparison to ezazahaz's best result, which involved Jayne Cobb and Severus Snape being on a trampoline and then Darth Vader wanting to join.
My list of fifteen characters:
1. River Tam (Firefly)
2. Jayne Cobb (Firefly)
3. Dr. Gaius Baltar (Battlestar Galactica)
4. Number Six (Battlestar Galactica)
5. Lt. Sharon "Boomer" Valerii (Battlestar Galactica)
6. Dr. James Wilson (House)
7. Dr. Remy Hadley/Thirteen (House)
8. Dr. Robert Chase (House)
9. James Norrington (Pirates of the Caribbean)
10. Davy Jones (Pirates of the Caribbean)
11. Sayid Jarrah (Lost)
12. James "Sawyer" Ford (Lost)
13. Shannon Rutherford (Lost)
14. Elle Bishop (Heroes)
15. Glitch (Tin Man)
And the questions submitted, with answers:
From ezazahaz:
If aliens abducted 3, 7, and 10, who would get impregnated with whose baby, and who would be dumped out an airlock to cleanse the gene pool?
Um. Well, this could go either way, depending mainly on the aliens. Either Baltar would seduce Thirteen with his manwhoreish ways and they'd chuck Davy Jones out the airlock in horror of his freaky squid-face...or, if the aliens are nonhuman enough they might worship the sea captain as some kind of paragon of otherworldly beauty, and get rid of Baltar after he inevitably manages to piss them all off (As for Thirteen, eh, we all knew she was kinky).
How long would a relationship between 14 and 11 last, who would break it off, and how many people would die as a result?
HOLY CRAP MOST AWESOME DESTRUCTIVE COUPLE OF DOOM EVER. *coughs* Okay, seriously? Assuming we're talking post-"Economist" Sayid, I suppose he would be jaded enough that he would stay with Elle for a significant amount of time, until she grew bored with him. Or tried to kill him. Or he had to kill her. You know, one of those.
As for how many people would die? Ho shit, whooooole lotta people.
If 2 made a clone of 4, what would 4's reaction be? What would 12's reaction be?
I would...really love to know how Jayne managed to make a clone of anybody, first-off. Actually, that'd probably be Number Six's reaction, considering there's so many of her to begin with: first she'd be all "How did you figure out how to clone somebody??" and then she'd be like "Eh. *shrugs*".
And Sawyer wouldn't care if she was a clone. Or a robot. He'd still want to have sex with her. (Actually, it makes perfect sense, if there was a world where they knew each other, that Sawyer is the first person Jayne would want to call to show off his new hot blonde clone-robot-space-alien woman to.)
What would the offspring (child or grown) of 1 and 9 be like?
I can tell you this much, it would have very pretty eyes. And when full-grown would be very smart and snarky and holy crap, I would not let within two hundred feet of anything remotely sharp or weapon-shaped unless you want your ass handed to you in a spoon.
Who would win in a fight between 8 and 15? What about in a beauty contest?
Glitch would obviously kick the crap out of Chase with his natural rhythm. A beauty contest, however, might be much harder to decide...
From persephone_blue:
Would it be hard for 6 to become a vegetarian? What if 13 made fun of 6 for it? Would a battle result? If so, who would win and would there be a resolution having to do with a barbecue of some sort?
I can't imagine Wilson would have too hard a time if he decided to become a vegetarian; he'd just whip up fancy no-meat foods for himself. But of course Shannon would mock him for it. Because she's Shannon, and why the hell not. Going vegetarian is so last decade, anyway. He'd go back to being friends with House just to get away from her. A barbeque however would not result, since she thinks red meat is totally gross.
What would happen if 7 and 5 got stuck in an elevator or transport unit of some sort with only a plastic of baggie of carrot sticks to eat before a curmudgeonly janitor/mechanic got them out? Would they survive? Would the baggie of carrot sticks?
If this is more recent canon Boomer, her bitterness and general borderline crazy might lead her to snap Thirteen's neck just for the hell of it, then calmly sit there munching carrot sticks until rescue arrived. But then, Thirteen might drive her to it (the neck-snapping, not the carrot-munching) if she starts lecturing her to get on out there and do something worthwhile with her life.
Of course, there is just as good a chance that neither of them is hungry and they'll sit there patiently, bored, until they start playing a game of strip poker. Or, y'know, make out. Or have hot sweaty sex. What? That is a totally viable result of that situation!
From erinm_4600:
Where would #6 prefer to go for dinner?
Anywhere, goddammit, if only someone else would pay for a change.
Did #3 and #14 ever meet?
Hmm, let's check: is Gaius still alive? ...Yes? Okay, then no.
Could #7, #11 and #3 co-exist?
If you mean, like, physically on the same dimension, clearly no. If you mean as, say, roomies...again, I think this somehow results in Baltar seducing Thirteen. While Sayid ignores them both. Or possibly Baltar irritates them both so much with his talking at them nonstop about the awesomeness of him and his God and constantly having all those women over for the late-night "prayer circle" meetings (yeah right) and never remembering to do the dishes when it's his turn, Sayid would eventually bump him off while Thirteen looked the other way.
Has the portrayer of #4 been in a movie or on TV with the portrayer of #12?
No. But that would be awesome.
If you were stuck in traffic with #9, what would you talk about?
If he had no chance of escape, I'd probably talk like a pirate nonstop and express my deep-seated love of pillaging, rum and wenches. With over-abundant usage of the word "booty". And just about when he got to the hair-pulling point, I'd be sure to mention my heroic admiration of famous gentleman-pirate Captain Jack Sparrow.
If, however, I actually didn't want to aggravate him, we'd probably spend the whole time mocking other people at their own expense.
You've got a movie night planned with #5. What movie are you gonna watch?
Brave Little Toaster.
...No, god, I'm kidding! Something, I don't know, soothing and relaxing. That doesn't involve violence. Or killing. Or love. Or robots of any kind.
I think this about sticks us with the earlier Harry Potters. Or possibly a marathon of Sex and the City.
#1 and #15 are stuck on a desert island. Who kills who first?
What, are you joking? Before the day is out the two of them have used raw materials available on the island to construct a triple-decker treehouse dwelling complete with patio deck and jacuzzi, a buggy that runs entirely on coconut oil, a telescope, a satellite dish, a solar-powered escape yacht and a private movie theater, and still had time to break for a few hours in the afternoon for a lesson in folk dancing and the waltz.
If #2 and #10 happened to be sitting next to each other in a sports bar, would they cheer for the same team?
I can't see Davy Jones caring much about land-dwelling, mortal sports. Assuming he did, I have this horrible feeling that him and Jayne wouldn't be. And Jayne would be one of those stubborn, ornery fans. And Davy Jones would say to him "Do yew fear death?" And, really, it only gets ugly from there.
#8 knows #13. How?
He's Austrailian. He was visiting relatives and Shannon probably had a fling with him when she got bored at some point when she had free time in Sydney.
Ooh, maybe they met at the airport bar just before she got on The Flight and she decided to do something to piss off her brother.
#10 is put in charge of the rest of the list. Who do they choose as their second-in-command?
Of the choices, either Sayid if he wanted them to be capable or Elle if his sadistic side is showing. Actually, scratch that: Elle, hands (or tentacles?) down.
#4 and #6 find themselves in the Outer Zone (assuming they aren't already there). Who do they meet first?
At the gate to Central City, Wilson somewhat hesitantly pushes Six behind him in an attempt to protect her as they're approached by some clearly unhappy Longcoats. Several minutes later, he's left staring in dismay at their lifeless bodies after his traveling companion takes them all down.
#12 needs to go to the grocery store. Why?
Ran out of Jack Daniels.
#9 just got fired. Why?
*laughs at the horrible, horrible irony*
#2 meets #11 on a street corner. Do they talk?
Nope. Jayne just silently admires Sayid's gun, punctuating with a manly grunt of approval.
#7 is the King of the World. Does the World approve?
As long as the World didn't know about the inevitable Huntington's, I'm thinking probably.
From fishand_chips:
#4 and #11 are on a plane that crashes in Africa leaving them stranded. They run into a herd of wildebeast and #15. Why was #15 there and what happens?
Glitch was out trying to gather specimens of a rare species of insect for an expansion he's making of the Encylopedia Outer Zonian. Unfortunatly, he got lost. Several times. He discusses this with Number Six over tea as Sayid draws a star map to figure out how to get them all home, while bemoaning over the fact that any plane he's on always crashes.
#1 goes to a restaurant that is attacked by ninjas. What happens and why are there ninjas?
River beats them all quite soundly, obviously. The ninjas were the result of yet another ill-suited attempt of the Alliance's part to re-collect her. Afterwards, she finishes her dinner and politely asks for some blueberry pie.
#7 decides run away and be pirate. Why?
Beginning to think that even being a life-saving doctor will make no real impact on the world after she's gone and frantic over the limited time she has left to make a difference, Thirteen decides if she wants everyone to remember her she might as well be infamous...as a legendary cut-throat queen of the sea.
...Although I can't help feeling, at this point, anything would pale in comparison to ezazahaz's best result, which involved Jayne Cobb and Severus Snape being on a trampoline and then Darth Vader wanting to join.
My list of fifteen characters:
1. River Tam (Firefly)
2. Jayne Cobb (Firefly)
3. Dr. Gaius Baltar (Battlestar Galactica)
4. Number Six (Battlestar Galactica)
5. Lt. Sharon "Boomer" Valerii (Battlestar Galactica)
6. Dr. James Wilson (House)
7. Dr. Remy Hadley/Thirteen (House)
8. Dr. Robert Chase (House)
9. James Norrington (Pirates of the Caribbean)
10. Davy Jones (Pirates of the Caribbean)
11. Sayid Jarrah (Lost)
12. James "Sawyer" Ford (Lost)
13. Shannon Rutherford (Lost)
14. Elle Bishop (Heroes)
15. Glitch (Tin Man)
And the questions submitted, with answers:
From ezazahaz:
If aliens abducted 3, 7, and 10, who would get impregnated with whose baby, and who would be dumped out an airlock to cleanse the gene pool?
Um. Well, this could go either way, depending mainly on the aliens. Either Baltar would seduce Thirteen with his manwhoreish ways and they'd chuck Davy Jones out the airlock in horror of his freaky squid-face...or, if the aliens are nonhuman enough they might worship the sea captain as some kind of paragon of otherworldly beauty, and get rid of Baltar after he inevitably manages to piss them all off (As for Thirteen, eh, we all knew she was kinky).
How long would a relationship between 14 and 11 last, who would break it off, and how many people would die as a result?
HOLY CRAP MOST AWESOME DESTRUCTIVE COUPLE OF DOOM EVER. *coughs* Okay, seriously? Assuming we're talking post-"Economist" Sayid, I suppose he would be jaded enough that he would stay with Elle for a significant amount of time, until she grew bored with him. Or tried to kill him. Or he had to kill her. You know, one of those.
As for how many people would die? Ho shit, whooooole lotta people.
If 2 made a clone of 4, what would 4's reaction be? What would 12's reaction be?
I would...really love to know how Jayne managed to make a clone of anybody, first-off. Actually, that'd probably be Number Six's reaction, considering there's so many of her to begin with: first she'd be all "How did you figure out how to clone somebody??" and then she'd be like "Eh. *shrugs*".
And Sawyer wouldn't care if she was a clone. Or a robot. He'd still want to have sex with her. (Actually, it makes perfect sense, if there was a world where they knew each other, that Sawyer is the first person Jayne would want to call to show off his new hot blonde clone-robot-space-alien woman to.)
What would the offspring (child or grown) of 1 and 9 be like?
I can tell you this much, it would have very pretty eyes. And when full-grown would be very smart and snarky and holy crap, I would not let within two hundred feet of anything remotely sharp or weapon-shaped unless you want your ass handed to you in a spoon.
Who would win in a fight between 8 and 15? What about in a beauty contest?
Glitch would obviously kick the crap out of Chase with his natural rhythm. A beauty contest, however, might be much harder to decide...
From persephone_blue:
Would it be hard for 6 to become a vegetarian? What if 13 made fun of 6 for it? Would a battle result? If so, who would win and would there be a resolution having to do with a barbecue of some sort?
I can't imagine Wilson would have too hard a time if he decided to become a vegetarian; he'd just whip up fancy no-meat foods for himself. But of course Shannon would mock him for it. Because she's Shannon, and why the hell not. Going vegetarian is so last decade, anyway. He'd go back to being friends with House just to get away from her. A barbeque however would not result, since she thinks red meat is totally gross.
What would happen if 7 and 5 got stuck in an elevator or transport unit of some sort with only a plastic of baggie of carrot sticks to eat before a curmudgeonly janitor/mechanic got them out? Would they survive? Would the baggie of carrot sticks?
If this is more recent canon Boomer, her bitterness and general borderline crazy might lead her to snap Thirteen's neck just for the hell of it, then calmly sit there munching carrot sticks until rescue arrived. But then, Thirteen might drive her to it (the neck-snapping, not the carrot-munching) if she starts lecturing her to get on out there and do something worthwhile with her life.
Of course, there is just as good a chance that neither of them is hungry and they'll sit there patiently, bored, until they start playing a game of strip poker. Or, y'know, make out. Or have hot sweaty sex. What? That is a totally viable result of that situation!
From erinm_4600:
Where would #6 prefer to go for dinner?
Anywhere, goddammit, if only someone else would pay for a change.
Did #3 and #14 ever meet?
Hmm, let's check: is Gaius still alive? ...Yes? Okay, then no.
Could #7, #11 and #3 co-exist?
If you mean, like, physically on the same dimension, clearly no. If you mean as, say, roomies...again, I think this somehow results in Baltar seducing Thirteen. While Sayid ignores them both. Or possibly Baltar irritates them both so much with his talking at them nonstop about the awesomeness of him and his God and constantly having all those women over for the late-night "prayer circle" meetings (yeah right) and never remembering to do the dishes when it's his turn, Sayid would eventually bump him off while Thirteen looked the other way.
Has the portrayer of #4 been in a movie or on TV with the portrayer of #12?
No. But that would be awesome.
If you were stuck in traffic with #9, what would you talk about?
If he had no chance of escape, I'd probably talk like a pirate nonstop and express my deep-seated love of pillaging, rum and wenches. With over-abundant usage of the word "booty". And just about when he got to the hair-pulling point, I'd be sure to mention my heroic admiration of famous gentleman-pirate Captain Jack Sparrow.
If, however, I actually didn't want to aggravate him, we'd probably spend the whole time mocking other people at their own expense.
You've got a movie night planned with #5. What movie are you gonna watch?
Brave Little Toaster.
...No, god, I'm kidding! Something, I don't know, soothing and relaxing. That doesn't involve violence. Or killing. Or love. Or robots of any kind.
I think this about sticks us with the earlier Harry Potters. Or possibly a marathon of Sex and the City.
#1 and #15 are stuck on a desert island. Who kills who first?
What, are you joking? Before the day is out the two of them have used raw materials available on the island to construct a triple-decker treehouse dwelling complete with patio deck and jacuzzi, a buggy that runs entirely on coconut oil, a telescope, a satellite dish, a solar-powered escape yacht and a private movie theater, and still had time to break for a few hours in the afternoon for a lesson in folk dancing and the waltz.
If #2 and #10 happened to be sitting next to each other in a sports bar, would they cheer for the same team?
I can't see Davy Jones caring much about land-dwelling, mortal sports. Assuming he did, I have this horrible feeling that him and Jayne wouldn't be. And Jayne would be one of those stubborn, ornery fans. And Davy Jones would say to him "Do yew fear death?" And, really, it only gets ugly from there.
#8 knows #13. How?
He's Austrailian. He was visiting relatives and Shannon probably had a fling with him when she got bored at some point when she had free time in Sydney.
Ooh, maybe they met at the airport bar just before she got on The Flight and she decided to do something to piss off her brother.
#10 is put in charge of the rest of the list. Who do they choose as their second-in-command?
Of the choices, either Sayid if he wanted them to be capable or Elle if his sadistic side is showing. Actually, scratch that: Elle, hands (or tentacles?) down.
#4 and #6 find themselves in the Outer Zone (assuming they aren't already there). Who do they meet first?
At the gate to Central City, Wilson somewhat hesitantly pushes Six behind him in an attempt to protect her as they're approached by some clearly unhappy Longcoats. Several minutes later, he's left staring in dismay at their lifeless bodies after his traveling companion takes them all down.
#12 needs to go to the grocery store. Why?
Ran out of Jack Daniels.
#9 just got fired. Why?
*laughs at the horrible, horrible irony*
#2 meets #11 on a street corner. Do they talk?
Nope. Jayne just silently admires Sayid's gun, punctuating with a manly grunt of approval.
#7 is the King of the World. Does the World approve?
As long as the World didn't know about the inevitable Huntington's, I'm thinking probably.
From fishand_chips:
#4 and #11 are on a plane that crashes in Africa leaving them stranded. They run into a herd of wildebeast and #15. Why was #15 there and what happens?
Glitch was out trying to gather specimens of a rare species of insect for an expansion he's making of the Encylopedia Outer Zonian. Unfortunatly, he got lost. Several times. He discusses this with Number Six over tea as Sayid draws a star map to figure out how to get them all home, while bemoaning over the fact that any plane he's on always crashes.
#1 goes to a restaurant that is attacked by ninjas. What happens and why are there ninjas?
River beats them all quite soundly, obviously. The ninjas were the result of yet another ill-suited attempt of the Alliance's part to re-collect her. Afterwards, she finishes her dinner and politely asks for some blueberry pie.
#7 decides run away and be pirate. Why?
Beginning to think that even being a life-saving doctor will make no real impact on the world after she's gone and frantic over the limited time she has left to make a difference, Thirteen decides if she wants everyone to remember her she might as well be infamous...as a legendary cut-throat queen of the sea.